WAL-MART FREAKS OF THE WEEK

6579

If you don’t like cleavage then you can just get the hell out! Stop being so picky, that’s all I’m saying.

6575

What is this, The Emperor’s New Groove here? You gotta cart your goat around in his chariot?

6572

I’m not sure what Wild West Walmart you think you’re at, but I highly doubt they allow horses in their store. Can you get a D.U.I. on a horse? I hope so.

6571

Don’t forget to pick up them zuckaretas at the store dear. I love me some zuckaretas.

6568

Hunny, there is no way to cover up your bottom biscuits when you leave the entire oven open for people to see.

6569

It really annoys me when I’m shopping around Walmart and see people sticking grocery items they don’t want in places they don’t belong. I’m not even sure how I’d react if I found an entire child just thrown up into a shelf.

6562

You know, with great marketing and sales pitches like this one it’s hard to believe Satan doesn’t have a larger following around town.

6561

Shiiit, I can’t blame her. Every time I venture into the wild world of Walmart I feel like I need a nap to recharge my batteries too. I just happen to wait until I get home, but whatever floats your boat.

See more freaks at People of Wal-Mart

 

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12 Comments
Mr. Chen
Mr. Chen
August 2, 2014 1:07 pm

the beautiful blonde said folks used to drive their horses into the bar at one time, maybe this is the Rosamond Walmarts

IndenturedServant
IndenturedServant
August 2, 2014 4:47 pm

Hey Chen, are you in or near Rosamond?

I ask because I’m looking for help in finding a guy I used to know down there. I suspect he has died or is permanently hospitalized. His name is Dennis Bishop. He liked to call himself The Lone Sidewalk Astronomer of Rosamond. Last I heard some asshole ran him over with a car or truck which damn near killed him. He was already in poor health after surviving a beating by a bunch of gang bangers.

There are actually quite a few people in the amateur astronomy community looking for him. He was an old veteran and we suspect he had some kind of mental disability but he was a great guy despite his health and being dirt poor. He just disappeared and no one has heard from him in years.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  IndenturedServant
February 27, 2018 12:54 am

Dennis is alive but in a vegetative state at a West Covina Rehab facility following his accident (hit by a pickup truck).

Rob in Nova Scotia
Rob in Nova Scotia
August 2, 2014 5:35 pm

Found this on local online wanted listings. Maybe one of these freaks would be interested.It made me laugh!

I have tenants moving out of a 3 bedroom basement apartment in August, the apartment is for rent September 1st. This apartment has not been maintained or cared for in any way whatsoever, and is quite frankly disgusting. I don’t know how anyone could possibly live in this much filth; however, after 5 years in the rental business I know that MANY people do. So instead of me investing a bunch of money into this unit and then running the risk of renting to someone who’s going to destroy it again, I’m looking to rent to someone who lives a similar lifestyle as my current tenants. I know there are alot of you out there, so lets be honest with one another up front. I’m not going to ask you to keep the place clean, or be respectful of my property; afterall you’re not going to listen anyhow!

Ideally the new tenants would have very little motivation to do anything in life except lay around their apartment all day. You will likely shower 1-2 times a week, but week long stretches are certainly not out of the question. You have a tendancy to use every last piece of dishware you own before even thinking about doing dishes, and in the meantime, the dirty plates, cups, pots and pans etc. will pile up on your countertop and attract ants and fruit flies.

There is coin op laundry in the building but you likely won’t use it often, instead you’ll choose to wear dirty clothes day afer day until even your own stink is too much for you to bare. You likely own dressers, and the apartment has several closets, but you won’t use any of them. Instead, your clothes will be spread out across all the floors throughout the apartment, so even if you did have clean ones, you would not be able to find or identify them.

You likely have at least one pet, likely a cat, because like most people I’ve met who can’t even take care of themselves, you for some reason have decided it would be “fun” to own animals that you also neglect to take care of. The litter box, if you even bother to have one, will hardly ever be changed and the apartment will wreak of cat urine and feces.

You likely have a kid or two, not because you neccessarily wanted any kids, or thought you could provide a solid foundation for raising children, it’s just that your sexual desires were frought with the same reckless abandon as your day-to-day life, and therefore you have had a “mistake” or two along your splendid journey through life.

You smoke too right? Of course you do, why wouldn’t you, you’re on a fixed income and cigarettes are expensive. Not a problem, the walls haven’t been painted in a decade, and your bad habit is going to be my reason for not painting them now!

Never held a broom, mop, or vacuum cleaner? Well that’s perfect because these floors have never seen any of these cleaning devices, it’s a match made in heaven!!

Ever heard of Windex, Comet, or Spray 9? No? That’s great too, I won’t even bother telling you why, just trust me when I say we’ll have no trouble getting along.

Of course there is no security deposit required, no landlord references, and no lease. We’ll just take it month-to-month. As long as you pay rent, you can stay as long as you like and I will NEVER increase the rent on you! Heat, lights and hot water are included. I’d even have cable and internet hooked up for you and add it on the rent if you’d like.

If you’re interested in viewing this disgusting apartment please contact me for a viewing. I won’t enter the apartment with you because I am not a fan of the smell of ammonia, but I will direct you to the door. I haven’t taken any pictures for the same reason, sorry to disappoint.

N8
N8
August 3, 2014 1:33 am

Rob that’s classic haha omg love it. As for the Wal-Mart pictures anyone else seen so many of them and they are still just hard to believe… good Lord

Mr. Chen
Mr. Chen
August 3, 2014 3:12 pm

IndenturedServant says:

I’m looking for Dennis Bishop.

I will ask the beautiful blonde, she lives there.

IndenturedServant
IndenturedServant
August 3, 2014 3:21 pm

Chem, if it helps, he used to live in a trailer park.

IndenturedServant
IndenturedServant
August 3, 2014 3:21 pm

And thank you to you and the beautiful blond.

Mr. Chen
Mr. Chen
August 3, 2014 3:53 pm
IndenturedServant
IndenturedServant
August 3, 2014 4:26 pm

Thanks Chen. I’ve seen all that and more. I’m trying to find some current contact info for him or a family member. I was thinking of helping him out with a little cash and if he’s up to it, a new telescope. I traded email and snail mail with him for a time but none of that works anymore. He was a Vietnam vet and I think he suffered some scrambling of brain cells over there so he may be under the care of the VA which increases his chances of being dead. I’ve called the VA and a hospital I know he’s been treated at but no one is willing to give him my address or phone #. It’s been about three years since I had any concrete info about him and that was fleeting.

He had quite a few people in the amateur astronomy community looking out for him and donating equipment and even a computer after his was stolen. Poor guy……if it weren’t for bad luck he’d have no luck at all. I think perhaps his suffering may be over.

I think he has a brother from HI. From what I can gather his brother might not be the friendliest type to Dennis or anyone else.

Mr. Chen
Mr. Chen
August 4, 2014 8:59 pm

I-S, his reported ph.# is disconnected, I drove to the trailer park, it is about 500 feet north of Avenue A and 20th west in Rosamond. The trailer is painted a primary blue color, it is the only one that is painted, all the rest are their original off white. #23 has an old subaru station wagon parked in front, and some kids toys in the yard. It sounds like Dennis is no longer the resident. the sign outside says the manager is in unit 6 ph.661-256-2175.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Mr. Chen
February 27, 2018 1:05 am

Dennis is at the Covina Rehabilitation Center.
261 Badillo St., Covina, CA
(626) 967-3874
He remains in a vegetative state since being hit by a pickup truck.