8 Reasons Why It Is So Hard To Find Someone Decent To Marry

Guest Post by Michael Snyder

 

Love And Marriage - Public Domain

It is not easy to be single in America today. If you are a man, it can be exceedingly difficult to find a good woman to marry. If you are a woman, it is literally a miracle if you can find a good man to marry. So is it just our imaginations, or has the process of finding a mate become much more challenging in recent years? Well, it is a fact that fewer people are getting married these days. For the first time in our history, there are more single adults in our country than married adults, and Time Magazine says that 25 percent of Millennials will never get married even once in their entire lifetimes. And of course those that do get married are taking far longer to do so than previous generations. Just recently, I wrote about how the average American woman is getting married 7.0 years later than she did in 1956, and the average American man is getting married 6.7 years later than he did back at that time.

So why is this happening?

Why has finding love become so challenging?

Below, I would like to share 8 reasons why it has become so hard to find someone decent to marry…

#1 The Me-Centered Society

We live in a “me-centered” society in which tens of millions of us are literally in love with ourselves. When pleasing self becomes the highest priority, that doesn’t leave a lot of room for the kind of self-sacrificial love that marriage requires. An astounding 24 billion “selfies” were uploaded to Google last year, and that says a whole lot about where we are at as a nation. So many of us are inclined to stay with our “partners” for only as long as they make us happy, and the instant that ends many of us wish to dispose of them. And that is a lot easier to do if you are “living together” instead of being legally married.

#2 It Has Become Much More Difficult To Find Someone With Good Values

The moral collapse of America is something that I write about extensively.  As a society, we have rejected the values of previous generations, and today most people generally do whatever they feel like doing. But this can become a major problem when you are looking for someone “that shares your values” to get married to. According to the Pew Research Center, more than half of all Americans that belong to the “Silent Generation” attend religious services weekly, but less than 30 percent of all Millennials do.  With each passing generation, we have become less Christian, less “conservative”, and less moral.  Unfortunately for young single adults, these trends do not seem likely to change in a major way any time soon.

#3 A Lot Of Young Adults Are Obsessed With Money And Materialism

A lot of single people these days will not date someone unless that individual has “good prospects” for the future. In fact, one survey found that 75 percent of American women would not date an unemployed man. Of course it is entirely reasonable to want a spouse that will work hard, but many young people are taking their obsession with materialism to ridiculous extremes.

I want to share with you what is going on in China these days, but similar scenes are playing out all across the rest of the world as well…

Parents often provide their male children with a home or car to make them appear more attractive. Women are often encouraged to “marry up” and not to settle for anyone who can’t provide material benefits.

A woman from the southwestern city of Chengdu rejected her boyfriend’s flash mob proposal last December, when she saw the ring and thought the diamond was too small.

She later told a friend that the man had agreed to “buy me a diamond ring as large as one carat,” Soho News reported.

It was reminiscent of a famous line from a 2010 Chinese dating show, when a contestant said, “I would rather cry in the back of a BMW than smile on the back of a bicycle.”

#4 A Lot Of Young Men Of Marriage Age Have Turned Into Bums

Have you noticed that a lot of young men in their twenties and thirties would rather spend all day watching television and playing video games than doing something constructive?

And record numbers of them have moved back home with no apparent intention of moving out. Today, 32 percent of all American Millennials are living at home with Mommy and Daddy. In some cases this is being done out of necessity because there aren’t enough good jobs, but in other cases it is simply pure laziness.

So what are quality young women supposed to do?

Are they supposed to actually consider these unambitious young men that seem perfectly content to indefinitely camp out in the basements of the homes that they were raised in?

#5 Sexual Immorality Is Absolutely Rampant

If you are looking for someone sexually pure to get married to, good luck with that. Everywhere you look in our sexually-hypercharged society, people are behaving like animals.

This is even happening in the wealthiest areas of our nation. The following is an excerpt from a recent Vanity Fair article about what is going on in the Hamptons right now…

Cops put the kibosh on a burlesque party at East Hampton’s Maidstone hotel. A professional orgy-planning outfit is hosting its first bacchanal later in June. Wednesday Martin, the author of Primates of Park Avenue, warns that married, heterosexual women in the Hamptons are conducting steamy affairs with their female fitness instructors. “Female flexuality,” she calls it. A randy rabbi, who blazed through five ex-wives, finally got the ax after running around town with a former flight attendant who was decades his junior. And a Southampton schools superintendent was investigated after one of his X-rated selfies made the rounds on campus.

The CDC says that there are 20 million new STD cases in America each year, and our young people are being corrupted at younger and younger ages. In fact, I just came across a headline earlier today about a “sexy school teacher” that got pregnant by a 13-year-old boy

The Aldine Independent School District Middle School teacher accused of having a sexual relationship with a 13-year-old student turned herself in to Montgomery County police Wednesday after a warrant was issued for her arrest.

Prosecutors said Alexandria Vera had a sexual relationship with one of her students and also got pregnant by the eighth-grader.

#6 An Increasing Percentage Of Our Young People Don’t Even Want Someone Of The Opposite Sex

According to the Daily Mail, the percentage of men and the percentage of women that have had sexual relations with a member of the same sex has approximately doubled since 1990…

Researchers from San Diego State University, Florida Atlantic University and Widener University in Pennsylvania, analysed data from the General Social Survey – a nationally representative survey of more than 30,000 adults that has asked Americans about their attitudes toward same-sex sexual behaviour since 1973 and about sexual partners since 1989.

They found that between 1990 and 2014, the percentage of men who reported having had sex with at least one man increased from 4.5 percent to 8.2 percent.

In the same time-frame, the number of women reporting having had sex with at least one woman increased from 3.6 percent to 8.7 percent.

#7 Sexual Immorality Is Running Rampant Even In The Church

Did you know that the rate of teen pregnancy is about the same for Christians in America as it is for society as a whole?

Very few of our churches like to talk about sin, commandments, holiness or eternal judgment anymore, and as a result many people in the church are going just as wild as people in the world.

Let me share with you one example that comes from an article authored by Dr. Michael Brown

Well, during an I Love New York celebration at a recent women’s conference hosted by Hillsong in New York City, a Hillsong youth pastor was onstage, dressed up as the Naked Cowboy, meaning that he too was wearing nothing but a cowboy hat, cowboy boots, briefs and a guitar.

But hey, after all, what’s wrong with that? We don’t want to get religious now, do we? What’s wrong with a youth pastor standing onstage in his underwear during a women’s conference? (Sarcasm fully intended.)

#8 A Large Percentage Of Our Young People Are Not Marriage Material Because They Are Addicts

You definitely do not want to marry an addict. In America today, millions of young people are addicted to alcohol, millions are addicted to illegal drugs, and millions are addicted to legal drugs.

But for this piece, I want to talk about pornography addiction in particular. As I have mentioned before, there are more than four million adult websites on the Internet, and collectively they receive more traffic than Netflix, Amazon and Twitter combined.

According to a recent Charisma article, 68 percent of all Christian men watch pornography on a regular basis, so even if you go to church “to find a man”, there is still a very good chance that you could be getting an addict.

And of course all of these sick images are resulting in an explosion of very bizarre “alternative lifestyles” in America including “puppy play”, “ecosexuality” and “polyamory”. Everything about sex, marriage and relationships is literally being turned upside down, and the United States will never be the same from this point forward.

Before I finish this article, I want to leave you with one final thought…

In May 1961, President John F. Kennedy announced that we would put men on the moon.

In May 2016, Barack Obama announced that we would put men in women’s restrooms.

The very foundations of our society are being systematically destroyed, and yet very few people seem upset about this.

If we continue going down this path, is there any hope for the future of our nation?

*About the author: Michael Snyder is the founder and publisher of The Economic Collapse Blog. Michael’s controversial new book about Bible prophecy entitled “The Rapture Verdict” is available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon.com.*


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42 Comments
Anonymous
Anonymous
June 1, 2016 9:11 pm

#1 For me: I see no reason that the government should setup another corporation involving a three-way “relationship” between myself, another human, and the government as the primary party. I refuse to agree to the government dictating yet another aspect of my life, telling me I have to give everything I owned to the other party in the case of a separation, taking control over children, etc. I will remain “single” as far as they are concerned. Any “partnership” will involve only myself and another human and responsibility for all related life decisions will remain between us.

http://www.usavsus.info/MarriageLicenses-TheRealTruth.htm

Yes, I know…good luck holding that line. So far it has worked out just fine, though.

Buster Cherry
Buster Cherry
June 1, 2016 9:24 pm

“Researchers from San Diego State University, Florida Atlantic University and Widener University in Pennsylvania, analysed data from the General Social Survey – a nationally representative survey of more than 30,000 adults that has asked Americans about their attitudes toward same-sex sexual behaviour since 1973 and about sexual partners since 1989.”

I think the researchers would find those statistics very different if Texas alone were surveyed.
(well, for sure if they would overlook Austin)

Jim
Jim
June 1, 2016 9:25 pm

I gotta tell you, this article is right on. Am in my mid 50’s and would not want to be anyone faced with this dilemma today. I had my fun in my teens and twenties, but then settled down. Not sure today’s generation will have the same chance. Snyder is usually a conspiracy leaning writer ,but there is no denying what’s in his article. This country is so screwed. I actually feel sorry what these young folk are and will deal with. Out.

General
General
June 1, 2016 9:32 pm

I am divorced, and after going through a divorce, I will never marry again. In fact, I tell every man, that I know, to absolutely not get married in this country. The reason? The legal system is totally out of control when it comes to divorce in this country. The end result will likely be a complete destruction of the concept of marriage. I will date and have girlfriends, but marriage, hell no.

Jim
Jim
June 1, 2016 9:43 pm

General–at least you had the chance. What’s the old saying better to have loved and lost than never to have had the chance or something to that effect. While I generally do not have a lot of sympathy for the millenials, this is one area that they have walked into, courtesy of the libs for the most part and the silence of the rest–are all culpable. There is a compet and total collapse of any semblance of moral values taking place in this country–as Kunstler observes so eloquently– a land of tattooed freaks and zombies with no moral compass, and I for one lay it at the hands of the boomers (including myself) who have let things get so out of hand.

Anonymous
Anonymous
June 1, 2016 9:48 pm

Exactly, General. I never have been married and don’t intend to be, as I stated above. I have seen way too much from not only the divorce-side of things, but also the state kidnapping children for “medical” reasons, the forcing the parents to, for instance, vaccinate the children against their morals and better judgment, and the list goes on to be interested in agreeing to that kind of arrangement.

You can read the story at the link I posted which touches on the legal reasoning for what they do. Suffice it to say, though, that your interests and well-being are of no importance to them in the matter, apart from scamming you farther. Of course, the attorneys et al love the process so that they can make bank off of you, too.

IndenturedServant
IndenturedServant
June 1, 2016 9:49 pm

The number one reason is that most men think with their dicks and too many wimmens misinterpret that as love.

Don’t get me wrong…..I’m a man and I think with my dick plenty but not when it comes to life long decisions.

NickelthroweR
NickelthroweR
June 1, 2016 10:15 pm

Greetings,

Call me selfish but these are very difficult times and if my competitors choose to remove themselves from the race by hiding in mommy’s basement or spend their day looking at porn then I’m all for it. Those that can adapt will survive and those that cant will perish in the basement. After all, one only needs to be out of the workforce for a few years to develop habits that become impossible to overcome. The same is true for dating and relationships.

Just look at the people on welfare and disability. Once on, they seldom leave and it will be true of the basement generation.

Anon
Anon
June 1, 2016 10:24 pm

Too many fat bitches

Roy
Roy
June 2, 2016 12:01 am

Addiction to credit cause of many divorces.

EL Coyote
EL Coyote
June 2, 2016 12:06 am

And Reason # 1 is that your a fucking asshole. If it wasn’t for alcohol you’d never get laid, even if you picked up a tranny.

bb
bb
June 2, 2016 1:39 am

That’s right El Coyote ,assholes and they’re ugly. Probably fat .No woman in their right mind would marry such losers.

James Cruiser
James Cruiser
June 2, 2016 4:39 am

Lessons from others is that it is really hell going through divorce especially here in America. I had a relationship with a blonde girl for 5 years years back in my college days, but then we broke up. Subsequently i got posted to Tokyo from my company.

In Tokyo Japan i made friends with many cute hot japanese girls from nearby tokyo women only college. After a few date i took Ayumi Katano a final year japanese student major in english literature. She was always warm friendly,l vivacious and sexy too. So last saturday i took her out for a binge drinking at Hilton Tokyo at Shinjiku districts to celebrate my birthday. After some glasses of beer and japanese sakae she asked me what do i want for my birthday, i jokingly told her i want her in my bed. Surprisingly she said OK !

Next we quickly finished our drinks and headed to the receptionist book a premium high floor room. The room was great sumptuous and cozy. I lay her on the bed kiss her, rubbed her breast and slowly undress her, began pulling her short skirt off then her tiny asian bra and panty, words cannot describe. She’s a asian virgin yes really enjoyed. For videos on our secret kinky affair click on this link

This where we had our super rendezvous
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For videos on our secret kinky affair click on this link http://goo.gl/EvLQVb

Llpoh
Llpoh
June 2, 2016 4:55 am

There are just too few decent folks. End of story. A decent young person would have to sift through a haystack to find the needle. Very sad.

harry p.
harry p.
June 2, 2016 5:20 am

Puppy Play?

WHAT.IN.THE.FUCK?

danubian
danubian
June 2, 2016 5:42 am

what a load of bullshit … the real reason men cannot find women is that women don’t need men anymore ‘cos they get the fucking state mafia to steal from the good hard working men. And where I live – in the frigging extermely rare event that a woman is pretty – she can become prostitute which is legalised. Is this the same M . Synder who predicted finacial apocalyse on 23 September 2015?. Stop wasting my frigging time will ya

IndenturedServant
IndenturedServant
June 2, 2016 5:53 am

Man! The freaks come out at night. I bet bb clicks on that link!

hardscrabble farmer
hardscrabble farmer
June 2, 2016 6:51 am

This reminds me of one of those articles about why you can’t eat wholesome, seasonal, organic food- it costs too much, gardening is too time consuming, the payback isn’t worth it, blah, blah, blah. Yes, there are obstacles, the best things in life are like that. The streets are not paved with gold, you have to put in the effort, but if you have your head screwed on straight and are willing to wait for the right one, there are plenty of perfect matches out there to choose from.

There is nothing in life that offers a bigger reward than to be in a happy marriage, nothing. It may be the single best bet for a stable and happy life, especially if you have traditional values.

The single greatest hope we have for our children is that they marry well.

starfcker
starfcker
June 2, 2016 7:17 am

Think about how much better our society would be if they promoted marriage the way they do college.

SpecOpsAlpha
SpecOpsAlpha
June 2, 2016 7:52 am

Altruism and mysticism are held up as ideals, then we wonder why the majority of humans act like demented monkeys?

An ethics that teaches that personal happiness is somehow an affront to a mystical version of God is insane. People who devoutly follow that idea become insane btw(like radical Muslims). An ethics that teaches that one should follow their heart and not their mind is insane. A religion that tells you to ignore your mind and accept ideas without proof is putting a time bomb into your head.

As an aside, this may explain why Hillary can commit all sort of crimes and vile acts and still be leading in most polls. The society has become sick, from ingesting altruism and mysticism.

IGOR
IGOR
June 2, 2016 7:55 am

What does attending church services have anything to do with morality? Organized religion is total bullshit!

indigentandindignant
indigentandindignant
June 2, 2016 8:14 am

I was raised aetheist. We were never taught biblical morals. I consider it criminal of my parents. I didnt learn christian morality until I was over thirty. My coming around to christian morality and finding my savior in Jesus Christ is the best thing that has ever happened to me personally. It has gotten me through much pain and suffering. I am better for it. Believe what you must. For me, it is everything. I love my in laws and their beliefs and the way they are with one another. It is so different from the aetheist family I was raised in. It makes a difference when the most important person in the room is not yourself, and everyone feels that way. Aetheists, you dont know, until you know. You cant know.

Anonymous
Anonymous
June 2, 2016 8:23 am

Here’s a prime woman for a marriage, someone should go for her: http://www.breitbart.com/milo/2016/06/01/bizarre-milo-protester-throws-trashcan-screams-video/

Bea Lever
Bea Lever
June 2, 2016 8:40 am

The owners want to destroy the family unit, looks like they are “winning”.

I have observed that the breakdown of the church is a large part of this problem, preachers don’t preach morality, they preach tolerance of gays, trannies etc. Only we can keep society on track by teaching our children/grandchildren right from wrong. I believe we are still the majority, but fading.

TPC
TPC
June 2, 2016 10:07 am

What a crock of bullshit. The answer is easy:

We’ve made it too easy for individuals to avoid the responsibilities of life, and the consequence of their own mistakes.

Part of marriage is facing down adversity together, and when you remove that common bond you destabilize the marriage.

Add in a shitty economy which forces two parent households, no fault divorce, EEO, state-run schooling, few jobs…..the list goes on.

People do not forge emotional bonds with each other when they have it easy. A life bereft of hardship is no life at all. You don’t learn anything, you don’t feel anything, and you don’t value you anything. Without hardship you live in limbo, mindlessly consuming and endlessly chasing your next “high”.

TPC
TPC
June 2, 2016 10:13 am

Damnnit all to hell. When I type emails at work I give myself a “5 minute rule” before I send it off to make sure there are no mistakes. Clearly I need to do that here. “and you don’t value anything.” There is no second “you”.

Bob
Bob
June 2, 2016 10:34 am

Relax, TPC. Your meaning came through loud, clear and right on, as usual. Typing skills are much more prevalent than thinking ability.

Stephanie Shepard
Stephanie Shepard
June 2, 2016 11:41 am

I’m not married and a lot of my friends aren’t married either. There’s too much risk associated with marriage in my opinion. And if you do get married at anytime the other person can decide on a whim they no longer want to be married or it’s too hard to stay married.

BUCKHED
BUCKHED
June 2, 2016 1:04 pm

Kinda’ hard to get married when you’re 25,living in your parents basement and working at a McDonalds because you have a degree in French Romance Lit that pay zilch in the public arena . What little free time they have is spent at $15.00 an hour minimum wage rallies.

Their parents reap what they sow. They are part of the trophy for participating gang that believes that every snowflake is special.

I have a friend who is an only child. His mom waited on him and his dad hand and foot. He became an adult that ZERO women wanted as a life mate. Why…because he wanted a slave not a wife .

Aquapura
Aquapura
June 2, 2016 1:59 pm

“A lot of single people these days will not date someone unless that individual has “good prospects” for the future.”

And amazingly statistics say that you are most likely to marry someone from a similar socio-economic strata. Most people do not marry up or down. I know a single woman who is 30yr old and constantly experiencing failed relationships. Why?? Probably because she will only date successful men, i.e. ones that will buy her shit. Asked her why her type is the “rich guy.” Her response – I’m hot and rich guys can afford to date hot girls. Didn’t bother to notify her that she’s NOT THAT HOT.

evan logan
evan logan
June 2, 2016 2:10 pm

Why would I marry someone who’s fake from head to toe, who’s religion is money, who hasn’t a clue how to treat a man, is sexually retarded, has the IQ of a houseplant, and voted for Clinton and oreo twice? Rather live alone thank you.

Vodka
Vodka
June 2, 2016 2:51 pm

A debauched American slut who has had a half-dozen hook-ups by the time she’s 18 and a dozen more in college? To be the mother of your children? Um…..no.

The best bet for a twenty-something American male would be an old fashioned farm girl from one of the former Soviet bloc countries or one of those strong Catholic Filipinos. Leave the modern American women to the Pick-Up-Artists in the bars. Or to their dildos.

Muck About
Muck About
June 2, 2016 2:58 pm

@Steph Shepard: Once again, your vision is too short sighted. Read HS above for the straight scoop.

I was married at 19, my wife was 18. We have been married 59 years now and have worked _together_ for everything we have earned and enjoyed in life.

So if it takes until you’re 30 to find the right guy. So what.. Date and have fun and don’t commit until sparks and commitment blossoms on both sides. Then _get_married_ which seals the compact formally and makes you partners in the journey of life.

A joining of one man and one woman in a partnership (we call it marriage) took many of thousands of years to develop into the very best system known to insure that genes are carried forward (our only claim for immortality) and a partnership with shared duties, kids and all, insures the most pleasant and prosperous life that one can enjoy (even those not as far up the evolutionary tree as we are – such as apes, and other species that mate for life).

People do change. In fact, we all change a bit or a lot as we continue to age, grow up mentally and experiences change us. Just do it in partnership and if the other person won’t tolerate the changes, then it’s a fresh problem to handle. It will inevitably work itself out, in human cases, _perhaps_ by divorce or separation and perhaps if you both work together, the problem can be solved.

This is provided neither of the partners happen to be crazy in which case, sometimes it’s better to pack a bag and vanish, kids and all and worry about the legal aspects later.

MA

Muck About
Muck About
June 2, 2016 3:02 pm

Damn I hate that RATING WIDGET!

MA

marty
marty
June 2, 2016 3:16 pm

First off if your a white male getting married is the last thing you want to do . Your life will be a living hell especially if you impregnate any of these sluts. Your will be divorced paying out the ass for kids you rarely see while your ex whores it up on your child support payments with other men. And got help you if you cannot make good on those payments due to job loss etc. you will lose your license, and probably end up in jail . Good luck american white males looking for that special someone LOL.

Stephanie Shepard
Stephanie Shepard
June 2, 2016 3:19 pm

Muck

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not against marriage. I just think it’s risky. Very true what TPC said, ” We’ve made it too easy for individuals to avoid the responsibilities of life, and the consequence of their own mistakes.” It’s risky because there’s plenty of people who don’t want to work and resolve problems, instead it’s easier for them to throw the other person away. We live in a very disposable culture.

Diogenes
Diogenes
June 2, 2016 6:34 pm

A question for those who are married; If you could go back in time would you do it again? Also If women didn’t have vagina would you even talk to one? My answers no and no

razzle
razzle
June 3, 2016 12:47 am

@Diogenes – If men don’t talk to people without vaginas… then why are women working so hard to invade every male dominated space?

What you mean is if women didn’t have vagina would men give them attention just for existing. The answer is of course no, as you said. Because they would expect them to prove their worth through action like they do people without vaginas.

Muck About
Muck About
June 3, 2016 8:39 am

@Step: Gave you a thumbs up on the last comment…
@Diogenes: My answer is _yes_ . Baack in the day anyhow…. Now,, still yes, but I’m more choosey now. The old saying. “Can’t live with ’em, can’t live without ’em!” sometimes applies.

But I’m old fashioned and don’t like the world I live in much anymore anyhow..

MA

marty
marty
June 3, 2016 2:43 pm

My buddy Jim Veasey told me years ago if women did’nt have that thing between their legs we would hunt em like deer !LOL!

EL Coyote
EL Coyote
June 3, 2016 2:56 pm

Stay classy, McFly.

jamesthewanderer
jamesthewanderer
June 5, 2016 4:24 am

Modern society tries to ignore the fact that it takes not just sperm and eggs, but family, commitment, dedication, sacrifice and determination to create a human being.
You can mix sperm and egg in a test tube, implant it in a surrogate mother, bring it to term and delivery, slap it in an empty room and leave it there for 18 years, with sufficient care to prevent diseases and food / hygiene / creature comforts to keep it alive. What you have will NOT be a human being, it has never known what civilization is truly like. Anyone who calls such an unsocialized, untaught creature human is lying to themselves – and to it.
THIS is largely what we have been doing – reproducing without civilizing, raising animals in human form. We cannot claim that the typical ghetto dweller, street rat, gang member or teen addict is human: they have been denied humanity by being raised in single parent, subsidized, unguided ignorance. And then we are surprised when these animals in human form lie, cheat, steal, rape and murder each other.
Humanity is tough to achieve, much tougher than birth and neglect. It’s going to be really sad when the Crunch comes and the EBT cards quit working: then all these animals will take it out on each other, and only the most animalistic will survive – until the supplies they can loot / steal run out. Then after the fires burn out, the survivors can come dig for raw materials. I want a real stiff drink right about now.