Maybe you two should meet and have some babies together. Their profanity-laden rants could be stuff of legend!
“Hello, can I get these dollar bills changed out for a few twenties? If you could just jam them into my thong that would be great! Kisses.”
I think the question that everyone wants to ask is: “Do the carpets match the drapes?” If the answer was “Yes” then I’m not really sure what my next question would be. What would yours be?
Ohhh what’s up sellout!!! You’re like that guy that breaks up with his girl and just talks mad shit on her for a week straight to all of his friends and then gets back together with her at the drop of a hat. Punk.
What is going on (or how little is going on) in your life that you hit a point where you decide to grow your fingernails this long? Who wants fingernails that curl like ram horns? Fricking weird as hell and literally serves zero purpose.
In this edition of ‘Who Wears It Better’ the secret ingredient is shit. Who wears shit better? Not really anything else I can say about that. Besides that it’s gonna be the shit.
This long hair thing is becoming an epidemic around here! At first I wasn’t sure how it could get worse, then I see you’ve turned your stinky gross hair into a lion’s tail and now it’s even weirder.
Obama is giving away cars now too?!?! Damn I thought I was missing out by not getting an Obama phone but now that I see this I’m actually kinda glad I don’t get anything.
When your hair resembles something that grows wild in a forest I think it’s time to re-do the ‘do!
Looks like the worst game of pool in this bottom biscuits edition of ‘Who Wears it Better’! So, are you playing stripes or solids?
Life lesson for you all out there: Never mess with a chick that looks like she curls Harleys for fun.
Santa always says “Make 7 Up Yours!” – seriously though, this is sad display of promotion. However, it does remind me of a game we played in school called Heads Up 7 Up. Anyone else play that as a kid? Anyone else peek under their desk to see the shoes of the person putting your thumb down?
Let me introduce you to Walmart’s other vision for America, SAM’s Club – where the quantities are larger and so are the parenting failures.
Ohhh! Check out Al Borland’s mother over here. C’mon lady, a picnic area would think you have too much flannel on!
Dear every girl with stupid long hair, your prince is not coming. Rapunzel found the one dude in the world who likes extremely long hair. You are shit out of luck. The only guy that might sing out for you is an excited barber trying to cut that off.
Ok, so here is a story I’m not even creative enough to make up. Here is a pleasant photo of a woman giving birth in Walmart on Black Friday (because that is where every pregnant lady needs to be). Turns out she named the baby Wally, which I like because it’s a mix between Willy the Pimp and Walmart. So ya just to recap: pregnant woman, Black Friday, baby Wally born. America.
Ahhhh yaaaa it’s Cyber Monday everyone, you know what that means! Anyone interested in jumping on AOL Instant Messenger and having cyber sex with me hit me up!…What’s that? That’s not what Cyber Monday is about? People don’t use AIM anymore either? Chat rooms? Nothing? Damn. Well in that case, make sure you buy our new book and new 365 page-a-day calender.
Twins, bikes, condoms, yes yes yes you don’t even have to tell me what it is, the answer is yes I’m in!
Ass cracks and $2 DVDs…that’s what Black Friday at Walmart is all about! If you braved the elements, please send us your pics to info@peopleofwalmart.com.
Hollow man says:
This group of pics are very disturbing to me. More so than normal.
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1st December 2012 at 10:11 am
Administrator says:
I wonder how many of these freaks voted for Obama?
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1st December 2012 at 10:42 am
MuckAbout says:
@Hollow: I don’t know.. Just seems like a normal group of people of walmart to me.. Weird and wild and perfectly normal.. And mostly sickening..
MA
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1st December 2012 at 10:43 am
harry p. says:
Is the baby of the woman giving brith in the walmart, now a citizen of walmart?
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1st December 2012 at 11:38 am
GOD says:
And I proclaim, before Judgement day, I have allowed Lucifer to open the gates of Hell and let the damned, the sinful, the soulless to walk the earth in plain view. They are to live off the just, the moral, those that will produce, as human are programmed to do, and do my work. Some will renounce their sins, but most will not. They will consume until there is no more to consume, like locusts from Hell, the will practice their sexual deviance, including necrophilia (see above picture), and they will be used by me bring about the end of the world, at which time I will pass judgement. They are serving my purpose, as does Wal Mart. It won’t be long now.
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1st December 2012 at 11:42 am
TeresaE says:
Dammit, my feces-vacation has been rudely ended.
Ever since I recruited for a living, my mind co-opted the Nat/Natalie Cole song, “Unforgettable.” Whenever I meet someone named, Porshe, or TyShauda, or Java, my mind plays the tune to Unforgettable with the word, “Unemployable, that is what you are….” Now, when I meet someone with neck/face tattoos, it plays on.
When I look at these people, I hear my song. Isn’t it pretty obvious to all productive, that people that CHOOSE to look like this have ZERO motivation to work for a living.
Our de-evolution continues unabated.
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1st December 2012 at 12:24 pm
Me No Likey says:
Re: Ram Horns Fingernail Girl/Man/It/Thing. Hater. It can out pick you in a Nose Digging Contest any day of the week. So there.
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1st December 2012 at 12:28 pm
Me No Likey says:
@ harry p.: No, but her child is now a U.S. citizen…
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1st December 2012 at 12:30 pm
AWD says:
New baby born, chaching, instant SNAP benefit increase, instant increase in direct deposit welfare cash, more free stuff: diapers, formula, you name it, given out in addition to everything else. Bingo! Wait a week, time to find another baby daddy and do it again!
I had a talk with one of my patients. He was complaining because a contractor gave out 40,000 free Obamaphones in S. Illinois, the only problem was they didn’t give out instructions on how to use them. He works (as a state employee, of course) for the 911 service for several counties. 911 had recieved more than 500 calls from the FSA Obamaphone recipients because they couldn’t figure out how to use their new, free Obamaphones, so called 911 for instructions. And, they the contractor didn’t ask the FSA members if they wanted a phone, they just gave everyone that qualified (from the welfare rolls) a free phone. This took place about 2 weeks before the election, of course. At least now they can also call 911 for an ambulance to go to the ER when they have a sore back, a hang nail, or a rash or cough, which they do every day anyway.
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1st December 2012 at 1:09 pm
SAH says:
@TeresaE – YES, to your comment. People can only look like this if they don’t have to work for a living. I don’t care if you work in a professional office environment or at McDonalds – there are hygiene, grooming and appearance standards set by every employer – and these people have literally made themselves ineligible for any job that I can think of (except maybe carnival side show freak?).
But I would go so far as to say that they are not only displaying a lack of motivation to work, but rather deliberately making themselves unemployable. Unemployment benefits? You have to prove you are looking for a job, but only keep getting benefits if you don’t get hired. FSA solution? Show up to the interview with TeresaE looking like this and you are guaranteed ‘unemployable’ and the free checks will keep rolling. SS Disability hearing coming up, but you are able bodied and trying to slide into lifetime disability checks for a ‘mental condition’? Show up looking like this and it proves you are either a complete retard or batshit crazy, and you can go on a cruise with Admin when your lifetime of checks start rolling in.
@Admin – ‘People of Walmart’ posts always make my heart soften toward the world-depopulating, elitist Banksters. Maybe they are right and a whole lotta people need to indiscriminately die or be quarantined in work camps from which they will never emerge. The types who shop at Neiman Marcus, Saks, and on Savile Row might be financial criminals but they don’t give me the heebie jeebies and make me reach for my bottle of hand sanitizer.
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1st December 2012 at 1:10 pm
sangell says:
The health department should send inspectors to Walmart and order people with a pants load of feces, floor length hair, filthy clothing and or bodies out of the store. For god’s sake they sell produce and meats in Walmarts and if any of these grotesque things were found in a commercial kitchen or food service they would be fined.
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1st December 2012 at 1:23 pm
AWD says:
“people with a pants load of feces”
It’s a new fashion statement, and a new fragrance, just in time for Christmas,
“Eu d’Wal-Mart feces”
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1st December 2012 at 1:43 pm
Kill Bill says:
Now now Obama voters are supporting the worlds largest business, they are capitalists and globalists because the also promote jobs in China, Mexico and Canada unlike Romney,
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1st December 2012 at 2:21 pm
Appalachian Trail Deblazer says:
@ Admin: All voted for Obama and some more than twice!
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1st December 2012 at 5:03 pm
AKAnon says:
It’s not often I disagree w/ SAH, but there are several career paths besides carnival sideshow freak that these “people” can enter. You can get away with some pretty weird looks in the tattoo/body piercing/body modification industry. Also working in BDSM nightclubs (or so I’ve heard).
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1st December 2012 at 5:11 pm
Llpoh says:
How come when I say stuff like TeresaE and SAH I cop shit by the tons (admin – that includes from you), but when the ladies say it they get cheered?
I point out I would rather rip my nose hairs out with pliers and set my hair on fire with a blow torch than hire thumb ring wearing pussies and I get brayed at by the resident donkeys.
Seriously, these idiots are unemployable. They are clueless fuckwits who refuse to alter their appearance for any reason – especially not to get a job. And I have had them tell me so – “I will never give up my purple hair – employers have to accept me for who I am”. They do not get it – employers do not like who they are, and if they want a job they need to hide their true selves from prospective employers.
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1st December 2012 at 6:45 pm
AKAnon says:
llpoh-It must be your charming personality.
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1st December 2012 at 6:50 pm
AKAnon says:
The price you pay for being a big dog.
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1st December 2012 at 6:50 pm
Llpoh says:
AKA – it is sexism, pure and simple. I feel so violated.
I am charming, tho, aren’t I.
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1st December 2012 at 7:03 pm
Administrator says:
LLPOH being charming
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1st December 2012 at 7:18 pm
Llpoh says:
Admin – I gather that is sarcasm!
I learned everything I know about being charming from you. Your tolerant and benevolent disposition is a beacon of light in an otherwise dark and vicious world. The way you calmly instruct the Fultons and DPs of the world is truly inspirational. I can only hope but to follow your example.
Snort.
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1st December 2012 at 7:54 pm
Administrator says:
Llpoh
Fulton is lucky I was in a good mood today.
I’ve been heeding your advice that I should be nice to newbies.
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1st December 2012 at 8:09 pm
Muck About says:
@llpoh: Keep the standards you have and fuck ‘em all. One out of ten (or is it twenty now?) will walk in clean shaven, short hair with a name like Harold and be ready to work to your standards. You’ll fire three others you thought would work out and didn’t, but that’s your job.
Been there, done that.
We’d have enjoyed working for each other.
MA
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1st December 2012 at 8:48 pm
Llpoh says:
Muck – no doubt. Birds of a feather flock together and all that.
One thing I notice is how people object to how work “interferes” with their lives. They do not want to work more than X hours a day or week, they do not want any overtime, the do not want emergency work situations messing with their weekends. They trot out that old gem about not wanting to live to work but rather to work to live. But they do not understand they actually need to work – that in the short run, work has to be an absolute priority – if people do not make sure their business is healthy, they will not have work, and thus will not be able to live.
Everything takes second place to their desire for leisure and fun. I do not need those sort – they are too short sighted to be of value.
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1st December 2012 at 9:05 pm
SAH says:
How threads where Llpoh and I battle usually end after the topic of abortion inevitably gets worked into it:
But I can’t and haven’t disagreed with anything Llpoh has to say about business and industry in America, throughout his numerous posts and comments. He is typical of any intelligent employer who will ABSOLUTELY discriminate based on appearance and grooming – hell, those are some of the last things we are legally allowed to discriminate against people for.
And specifically on the subject of ‘appearance’ and work – regardless of the industry you are in, reputation and the perception of reliability and integrity are how you get your foot in the door. The company is projecting an image to attract clientele, and prospective employees have to project a compatible image to employers. Just as manners might have to be ‘faked’ but they are a form of social communication which indicates your respect for others and your level of class, so too does appearance indicate to others your level of respect for yourself, your reputation, and your competence.
This is one of the reasons I personally take my appearance so seriously – maintaining my weight, and also dressing and grooming myself in a way that is both modest and feminine. For women especially, it is a difficult note to hit – how to simultaneously project attractive femininity but also NOT project any overt sexuality. Many women choose to just look butch, others choose to flat out dress like sluts, still others don’t strive beyond slob. But if a woman can appear identifiably feminine, but simple and not ‘overly fussy’, and attractive without the slightest hint of sluttiness or disrepute, she will move up in the world much faster than either the butches or the sluts. Truly image is so much, if you can appear clean, polished, polite and positive, and then back it up with even mediocre work you are golden. If you can appear clean, polished, polite and positive, and then back it up with high quality work, you’ll get scouted for management.
I’m full of gloom and doom, I hate most people, love to argue with old boomer men, occasionally curse and drink bourbon – but by god I never show that side to my kids or my boss.
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1st December 2012 at 9:42 pm
Llpoh says:
SAH – i seriously do not want to know what my employees do when not at work – i shudder at the thought. But I do expect them to look like reasonable folk at work, and I expect a hell of a lot more than that at an interview.
Social norms have a place in society, whether those morons believe it or not.
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1st December 2012 at 9:52 pm
crazyivan says:
Nail on the head LLPOH,
” and if they want a job they need to hide their true selves from prospective employers”
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1st December 2012 at 10:01 pm
Kill Bill says:
He is typical of any intelligent employer who will ABSOLUTELY discriminate based on appearance and grooming -SaH
Wait. Just wait. You once posted here that you were lucky to have a job where you could use your phone and socially network at work
If that wasnt you then I would propose, not marriage, but that you get a gravatar that is encrypted and tied to your email address.
Such as I have done to stop Stucky from doppelganging me
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1st December 2012 at 10:24 pm
Kill Bill says:
We have a free market, you can buy whatever you want but you cant be the freak that buys it and the nutjob that produces it!
Sheesh, this is America, we have to have morals and drones.
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1st December 2012 at 10:29 pm
ron says:
Must be an east coast thing.The main thing i see is people wearing incredibly tight clothes.No matter how fat they are.We figured out that hispanic women figure if theyre clothes are tight they are sexy.
Oh yeah,the pajamas thing.I actually laugh out loud and ask people if they are just to lazy to get dressed.Always makes the wife cringe.
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1st December 2012 at 10:45 pm
Kill Bill says:
Ivan, often your crazy [imo], but sometimes you make a good point.
Cheers (“)__)
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1st December 2012 at 11:36 pm
AKAnon says:
I have a couple hires coming up-can’t wait to interview. But even at a gov’t job, I can discriminate against the guy with “I want to fuck your corpse” sleeveless T. It turns out that you cannot say “fuck” in any context in which it does not constitute sexual harassment-or so say the lawyers. Fuck that.
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1st December 2012 at 12:05 am
Kill Bill says:
I have a couple hires coming up-can’t wait to interview. -AK
What if one of them is me?
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1st December 2012 at 12:17 am
John A says:
This comment thread is one of the most COMICAL that I have ever read at TBP.
Regarding the above Walmart photos: I am of the opinion that most of these folks look out of place above ground. As such, my jaded perspective is one that rests squarely between disgust and morbid fascination.
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1st December 2012 at 1:03 am
AKAnon says:
KB, come on down. But leave your thumb ring at home. And any clothing with the F word, or political statement. Pushing politics is also verboten.
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1st December 2012 at 1:33 am
Grim Reaper says:
Ah, so much meat, so little time…………
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1st December 2012 at 11:38 pm
Mi Naem says:
Really disturbing.
I couldn’t figure out where one would get a shirt like that first pic with “corpse”.
It’s a promo shirt for a band called Wolfpac which plays something that is supposed to resemble music.
Many of these people are not in prison.
I’ve been naive.
I gotta get more guns!
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1st December 2012 at 12:04 pm