NO KIDS! You absolutely do NOT want to unwrap the present underneath his tree!
That’s very festive. I’d say I was a big fan if I didn’t know that I’d get distracted and run over my neighbor’s reindeer in his yard if I saw you coming down the road while I was driving.
Don’t beat yourself up there Gandalf, every time I end up at Walmart it’s the result of an unexpected journey. Little Hobbit humor there for you guys. “Little Hobbit”…haha, there was a joke inside the joke explanation! Oh my I’m cooking now!
It is at this point that I’d like to pose a simple question to all of you. How much would it take for you to do this for a week? For me, I’m gonna put it around $1,500.
This looks like the worst slumber party ever….why wasn’t I invited?!
So Obama is an evil gay ape? That’s what I’m supposed to take away from your ranting, creepy Winnebago? Has anyone ever in the history of the world changed any belief they had based off of a Winnebago? It would take one hell of a Winnebago for me to take it seriously. Like the one in Spaceballs was pretty dope, but even then I doubt I’d believe Obama was Hitler/Satan from it.
“Who Wears Wedgies Better?” Really? I never thought we’d have this. When I get a wedgie it’s like my world is over for those 8 seconds I try to move with it. Come one people, I’ve personally got like 12 different moves to take care of my wedgie and those are the discrete ones, I’m not even talking about the basic grab and yank. Geeez!
What is it about Walmart that makes everyone think they’re at a tractor pull?
“What The Elf?” indeed. Christmas is right around the corner and your lazy ass is stocking up on OJ instead of building my wooden toy train up at the North Pole. On a side note, do kids still get wooden trains? I’m sure some group of hippies figured wood was too dangerous and banned them or some other type of stupid crap.
No shit Sherlock. Did you think I was under the impression that those sad single mothers I throw dollar bills at somehow get pregnant via immaculate conception? Come on man, I’m not stupid, I can see the c-section scars.
Hey now everybody c’mon, settle down. To be fair, flowers can’t grow if they aren’t subjected to sunlight so she has a valid reason here.
Literally the only smile the back of your head will ever see.
Check out my main man Willy flossin’ that cheetah print. Looks cooler than Chester Cheeto himself. Keep doin’ whatcha doin’ playboy.
Before you rip your eyes out, let me just calm you down and remind you of all the nice stuff to look at around Christmas. It’s not worth never being able to see anything else again. It’s close, but it’s not worth it.
The apple (bottom) doesn’t fall far from the tree…
Looks like Walmart is targeting their Christmas decorations to our pals over at WhiteTrashRepairs.com! Bubba gonna love this!
If there is anything sexier than some old saggy titties in a plain white bra, I haven’t found it….I know it’s tough to chose, but I’m forcing you to pick “Who Wears It Better?” in this Victoria Secret From The 1920′s Edition!
You don’t need to be Sigmund Freud to spot the daddy issues here.
Say what you want about their views on Sunday business, all I’m saying is Chick-fil-a is killing it with their marketing. Love their guerrilla marketing here! Thanks lady, I will go eat more chicken…’cause it’s delicious.