So God made a banker
Commentary: A commercial for the next Super Bowl?
By Brett Arends
To be read in the voice of Paul Harvey.
And on the eighth day God looked down on his planned paradise and said, “I need someone who can flip this for a quick buck.”
So God made a banker.
God said, “I need someone who doesn’t grow anything or make anything but who will borrow money from the public at 0% interest and then lend it back to the public at 2% or 5% or 10% and pay himself a bonus for doing so.”
So God made a banker.
God said, “I need someone who will take money from the people who work and save, and use that money to create a dotcom bubble and a housing bubble and a stock bubble and an oil bubble and a commodities bubble and a bond bubble and another stock bubble, and then sell it to people in Poughkeepsie and Spokane and Bakersfield, and pay himself another bonus.”
So God made a banker.
God said, “I need someone to build homes in the swamps and deserts using shoddy materials and other people’s money, and then use these homes as collateral for a Ponzi scheme he can sell to pensioners in California and Michigan and Sweden. I need someone who will then foreclose on those homes, kick out the occupants, and switch off the air conditioning and the plumbing, and watch the houses turn back into dirt. And then pay himself another bonus.”
God said, “I need someone to lend money to people with bad credit at 30% interest in order to get his stock price up, and then, just before the loans turn bad, cash out his stock and walk away. And who, when asked later, will, with a tearful eye, say the government made him do it.”
God said, “And I need somebody who will tell everyone else to stand on their own two feet, but who will then run to the government for a bailout as soon as he gets into trouble — and who will then use that bailout money to help elect a Congress that will look the other way. And then pay himself another bonus.”
So God made a banker.
AWD says:
God didn’t make banksters, Obama’s dad did
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6th February 2013 at 11:13 am
Muck About says:
Reading this, one would almost think that nothing has happened to improve banking ethics since – oh, say 1000 BCE or so.
MA
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6th February 2013 at 11:28 am
Hope@ZeroKelvin says:
I thought that banksters were actually proof of the existence, and ascendancy, of SATAN.
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6th February 2013 at 11:46 am
KaD says:
Someone made a banker-I’m pretty sure it wasn’t GOD though.
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6th February 2013 at 11:46 am
AWD says:
“I thought that banksters were actually proof of the existence, and ascendancy, of SATAN.”
Here’s some more proof…
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6th February 2013 at 12:05 pm
AWD says:
The economic collapse blog ran yet another article about banksters:
Who Controls The Money? An Unelected, Unaccountable Central Bank Of The World Secretly Does
http://theeconomiccollapseblog.com/archives/who-controls-the-money-an-unelected-unaccountable-central-bank-of-the-world-secretly-does
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6th February 2013 at 12:08 pm
underfire says:
This strikes a nerve because it’s so true, a very succinct statement about much of what has brought this country to it’s knees.
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6th February 2013 at 12:43 pm
KaD says:
Luke 16:13- “No servant can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money.”
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6th February 2013 at 2:06 pm
Maddie's Mom says:
@KaD,
We know of a man who was a banker and a preacher. Seriously.
It has not worked out well for him apparently.
The last we heard he is doing neither, cannot find work, and his son is helping him financially.
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6th February 2013 at 3:04 pm
KaD says:
I guess my big question would be WTF was he thinking and how does a preacher reason that out?
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6th February 2013 at 4:14 pm
Kill Bill says:
The last we heard he is doing neither, cannot find work, and his son is helping him financially. -KaD
So now he is a con-man.
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6th February 2013 at 6:41 pm
Kill Bill says:
Sorry, I meant to attriibute that to MM.
Me bad.
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6th February 2013 at 6:41 pm
KaD says:
That explains alot.
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6th February 2013 at 6:53 pm
So God Made a Banker says:
[...] is a blog post making its way around the blogosphere by Brett Arends. It is a play on the Ram Truck commercial where Paul Harvey praised the American [...]
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6th February 2013 at 11:32 pm
eugend66 says:
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6th February 2013 at 3:46 am
[UK-911-Truth] MarketWatch Columnist Brett Arends: So god made a banker…..(well, the writer should have said So Lucifer made a banker…… – Alex James | says:
[...] So God Made a Banker [...]
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6th February 2013 at 9:52 am