Did you know more people seek divorce advice around Valentine’s day than any other time of the year? In a brilliant publicity stunt, this lawyer offered a free divorce of Valentine’s day. His phone’s been ringing off the hook ever since. Lawyers make a nice living preying off the pain and misery of others.
With 50% of marriages ending in divorce, do you feel lucky punk? Do Ya? Getting divorced is easier than buying underwear. The countries and people that still value family and marriage are successful, and countries (like ours) that value divorce and broken homes are failing miserably; turning into social welfare states.
Enjoy Valentine’s day. Spend as much as you can, max out those credit cards, because by tomorrow you may be divorced.
Free Divorce For Valentine’s Day
By ALAN FARNHAM | Good Morning America
Attorney Walter H. Bentley III of Southfield, Mich., will be offering a lucky client a Valentine’s Day special: a free divorce.
He got the idea, he tells ABC News, when one of his students in a night school class he teaches invited him to a party. “She’d just had her divorce finalized,” says Bentley, “and she was celebrating. I’d never thought about that before—celebrating divorce. So, I thought, why not do something special for Valentine’s Day? You can’t find a new love before you close the chapter on the old.”
Bentley’s website gives contest rules: “The winner will be chosen based on the most compelling and convincing story as to why they should be the winner. The divorce is limited to an uncontested divorce with no or minimum child custody issues.” It’s limited to Michigan residents. The deadline for applying is 11:59 p.m. EST on February 12.
Nearly 500 people have applied so far, says Bentley.
As decision hour nears, he his colleagues, he says, will narrow down the list, picking the stories they feel are most affecting. Then, after the contest closes, they will make their decision. “We’re looking for someone truly struggling to move forward,” he says, “maybe someone who’s overcome some obstacle —a foreclosure, say. Maybe they’re struggling to make ends meet, and they don’t have enough money for a divorce.”
An illness also could give them a leg up. “Somebody diagnosed with cancer. Maybe that’s one reason their spouse no longer wants to be with them,” he speculates.
A quick look around the U.S. by ABC News found some other attorneys offering divorce specials for Valentine’s Day, but in them the winner is expected to pay court costs and filing fees. Bentley’s appears to be the only completely free ticket to splitsville.
“They won’t have to take out their wallet for anything,” he says. “All the hearings, all the paperwork. I will pay all the fees and expenses, to the end. What they’re getting would ordinarily cost them $1,500 to $3,000.”
What kind of feedback has he gotten from clients or fellow attorneys? “90 percent positive. They all know I’ve got a big heart.”
A survey in 2011 by Avvo.com, a service that matches attorneys with clients, found a strong uptick in the number of people seeking divorce advice around Valentine’s Day.
But attorneys aren’t the only people to profit from unions being put asunder.
Josh Opperman was jilted by his fiancée six years ago. As if that wasn’t bad enough, he discovered when tried to re-sell the engagement ring for which he’d paid $10,000 that his jeweler wouldn’t give him a dime more than $3,500. He tells this story on the website he since has launched for persons buying or selling slightly-used engagement rings and wedding bands, “I Do Now I Don’t.”
Among the used wedding bands currently showcased is one priced at $1,077. “Ring owned by a real prince!” says the listing. “1 CT diamond/ 14K Gold. I am the only son of the last remaining descendant of the King & Queen of an overthrown monarchy. This was my wedding ring. As you can see, things did not work out as planned; however, the ex-fiancee and I are still close friends and we will always love each other.” The deposed king signs himself “Johnny.”
Pirate Jo says:
Marriage and children are a waste of money. I never did either one, so there aren’t any lawyers getting rich off me.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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14th February 2013 at 1:26 pm
flash says:
Oh shit! Is that today?
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14th February 2013 at 1:31 pm
flash says:
..never mind.It’s on Thursday..scared me there for a minute.I still have two days to get a card,.
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14th February 2013 at 1:34 pm
AWD's girlfriend says:
AWD, sweet honey baby, you gonna let me sit on your face? I wasked out all the shit in my wrinkled folds just for you, honey baby.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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14th February 2013 at 1:57 pm
KaD says:
Q: Why does divorce cost so much?
A: Because it’s worth it!
Seriously, a holiday named after a massacre? What could possibly go wrong with that?
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14th February 2013 at 2:05 pm
Hope@ZeroKelvin says:
I got divorced for $750 in lawyer’s fees from my first husband after 2 kids and 11 years of marriage.
It was the $5K I spent on the private investigator to find the money hiding and girlfriend that allowed me to “save” on my divorce bill as well as keep the house and everything in it, avoid paying him alimony/child support or a tag on my pension/savings (since I made more $$).
Best money I think I ever spent, almost as good as my ammo and gun manufacturer stocks, heh.
That saying, Mr. HZK, my second husband, is a Prince and we will have a very romantic evening planned doing the final inventory on our ammo and gun safes, aha aha, made you look.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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14th February 2013 at 2:43 pm
IndenturedServant says:
I sure wish I could embed this but you’ll just have to click the link.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZzSzu5XS1c
I_S
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14th February 2013 at 2:49 pm
Stucky says:
IS
“For God’s sake, tell him to take his hand off the intercom.”
Fuckin’ hilarious.
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14th February 2013 at 3:00 pm
AWD says:
Stuck, that picture, ugh
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14th February 2013 at 3:08 pm
AWD says:
Anybody need a baby daddy?
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14th February 2013 at 3:17 pm
AWD says:
I lost it all for the nookie…
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14th February 2013 at 3:19 pm
Stucky says:
Living in a state of permanent sexual arousal might not sound like such a bad deal for many of us, but for Amanda Gryce, 22, it’s no laughing matter. The 22-year-old says her life is being ruined by constant multiple orgasms which can be triggered by just about anything imaginable, including loud music, car journeys and even ringing mobile phones. And it can happen absolutely anywhere – when she’s with her friends and even while she’s at work as a sales associate in a baby products shop. Amanda sometimes has to masturbate up to 15 times in one day to get relief. ‘I can have 50 orgasms in one day and five or ten within an hour of each other. It happens when I’m with my friends or out in public and it’s very embarrassing.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2277430/Being-permanently-aroused-TORTURE-Shop-worker-22-50-orgasms-day-turned-mobile-phone.html#axzz2KaXpVuFe
This is she …. the 15x a day masturbator …. a girl that can keep up with AWD
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14th February 2013 at 3:40 pm
Stucky says:
Another Happy Valentine story. Maybe Admin knows these people? Stabbed in the neck for just looking at porn?? Holy shit, I hope Ms Freud doesn’t see this story.
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The wife of a former University of Pennsylvania basketball star is charged with murder after allegedly stabbing her husband to death in bed, according to court records. Matthew White, 53, of Media, Delaware County was asleep in bed when his wife, Maria Rey Garcia-Pellon stabbed him in the neck in the early hours on Monday, the records say.
According to the records, Garcia-Pellon went in the kitchen in the couple’s home sometime around midnight. There, she retrieved a glass of water and two knives. She returned to the bedroom and slipped the knives under her side of the bed. She took one of the knives out as her husband was asleep. She stabbed him in the neck, the records allege.
White awoke and the two struggled briefly before he collapsed of his wounds. “I’m dying, I’m dying,” he said. Garcia-Pellon then changed her clothes and left the house. She went to the home of a friend and told her White had allegedly been viewing pornography on a computer and she killed him. The friend called 911. “I caught him looking at pornography, young girls, I love kids,” Garcia-Pellon told investigators. “I had to do it.”
========== =
I think the dead man is the pic on the left. But I could be wrong.
http://www.philly.com/philly/news/breaking/20130212_Ex-Penn_basketball_star_stabbed_to_death_allegedly_by_wife.html
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14th February 2013 at 3:50 pm
ThePessimisticChemist says:
IS’s video is awesome.
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14th February 2013 at 3:53 pm
Stucky says:
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14th February 2013 at 3:54 pm
Administrator says:
Stuck
There is only one solution to this tragedy. We need to ban porn.
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14th February 2013 at 4:01 pm
Eddie says:
Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome (in women of course, because this condition is normal for all men) is apparently not a great thing to have. Women have committed suicide over it.
But….what guy wouldn’t want to date a woman with that problem? At least for a couple of weeks, until she wore your ass completely out.
Reminds me of MASH…the book, not the crappy TV show. In the book Hawkeye and Trapper were always in search of an epileptic whore.
I’ve been married for over 30 years. My last divorce cost me $250 and a high mileage VW Beetle.
Valentine’s Day…the one day of the year we never go out to dinner. The restaurants are way too crowded.
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14th February 2013 at 4:27 pm
AWD says:
Two days left, I recommend this nice item for your sweetie:
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14th February 2013 at 6:16 pm
Administrator says:
I hope you shit throwing monkeys clicked that nice Valentine’s day Amazon button I’ve had up for two weeks.
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14th February 2013 at 7:29 pm
ThePessimisticChemist says:
Sorry, been going to the same florist for years.
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14th February 2013 at 7:49 pm
AWD says:
It’s hard to believe two people thumbs up’d Stucky’s disgusting fatty picture. We got a chubby chaser problem here.
I shoulda hired these guys
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14th February 2013 at 7:52 pm
KaD says:
I didn’t click on that BUT you should have my donation my now.
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14th February 2013 at 11:38 pm
Administrator says:
KaD
I received it. Thank you very much.
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14th February 2013 at 6:53 am
KaD says:
And I don’t even have a job right now bichez! If I can do it you can do it.
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14th February 2013 at 11:27 am
KaD says:
Here’s my menu for tomorrow: 10 oz ribeye bison steaks, chipotle lime sweet potatoes, broccoli cheddar au gratin, and blueberry peach panna cotta for dessert. Saturday morning I’m going to make fresh off the grill belgian waffles with choice of raspberry and or chocolate sauce, maple syrup, and whipped cream with bison breakfast sausage and gourmet coffee.
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14th February 2013 at 6:27 pm
Anonymous says:
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14th February 2013 at 6:58 pm
Anonymous says:
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14th February 2013 at 7:05 pm
Anonymous says:
What a stupid fucking holiday.
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14th February 2013 at 7:07 pm
AWD says:
Maybe Admin will repost this at the top again.
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14th February 2013 at 11:42 am
AWD says:
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14th February 2013 at 11:59 am
AWD says:
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14th February 2013 at 12:24 pm
AWD says:
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14th February 2013 at 12:27 pm
Dan says:
Today is Valentine’s Day. Or, as men like to call it, Extortion day
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14th February 2013 at 3:08 pm