This crap never stops. There’s hardly ever a dull day in the Stucky household.
My mom called yesterday at 9AM … not a good sign since I was just there the day before, and she never calls in the morning. All I got from her hysterics was that dad had a car accident and is in some hospital. I hang up the phone, and thirty seconds later we’re out the door and on our way to the house. There are six cops there. Here’s what we were able to guess happened;
My dad went out to get the morning paper, go home, and pulled backwards into the driveway, when suddenly both his legs went COMPLETELY numb. He doesn’t realize his foot is on the accelerator. We believe, based on past incidences that his blood pressure dropped precipitously. The garage door was open. He smashed into the near-mint condition 1973 Mercedes 280 I bought him about 15 years ago, causing significant damage to the entire rear end.
As a side note, it is the only remaining “thing” both my dad and I love and cherish. I bought it from a doctor’s wife, and we are the second owners. It only has about 125k miles on it. It has “antique” plates which means he can only drive it 2,000 miles a year … and it does not have collision insurance. It was truly a head-turner. Every time dad took the car out for a grocery run or gas people would stop, look, and comment. I doubt he’ll want to spend a few thousands of dollars out-of-pocket to fix it. Such a sad thing to see it all crunched up, really. I suppose it’s God’s way of telling us … don’t be attached to anything this world has to offer, it is ALL fleeting and will turn to dust … or, rust.
So, dad panics. It puts the Toyota Camry into drive …. not realizing that his numb foot has the accelerator floored. We know this because a neighbor across the street and one house over was outside at the time. She heard the clunking of gears and the acceleration. Even though he can’t move his feet, dad is confused and dazed, and does not have the presence of mind to throw the car into “park” or turn off the ignition.
So, he accelerated full speed down the driveway, bottoms out at the dip, bounces across the street, hits the curb, flies airborne through the neighbor’s fence, snaps about a six-inch diameter tree literally in half, obliterates a glass patio table, plows through a row of hedges, smashes through the other side of the fence, and hits the corner of the other neighbor’s house before coming to a stop. Dad’s nose and mouth hit the steering wheel, his head hit the windshield, separating it from the roof. There’s a lot of blood everywhere.
The neighbor seeing this calls 911, and police and ambulance are there in about two or three minutes. When I arrive the car is already towed, and the ambulance took dad to the hospital.
Now, to the people …
The black woman. She’s the neighbor who saw the whole thing and called 911. She’s lived there for about ten years and we never met her, or even waved to her. We don’t like any of our “those” neighbors across the street. When my parents bought the house in 1966 there was about 8 acres of forest “across the street”. In fact, when the realtor showed them the house, we saw several deer feeding. That clinched the deal. Then the owner of that land died, left it to his daughter, she sold it to a developer, and about a decade ago they erected eleven McMansions … destroying our little “Wild Kingdom” in the heart of industrial central New Jersey. So, we hated our neighbors. It seems logical.
As I walk up the driveway I see this black woman with her arms around my mother – who is still in a semi-state of hysteria. I can hear her saying “It’ll be OK dear. It’ll be OK.”, over and over. As I approach her she says, “I’m sorry we have to meet this way, but don’t you worry. When you’re not here I’ll come check up on your mother. I just gave her my phone number. Anything she needs, she can call us anytime. Don’t you worry.”. And then she gave me her number also. And then she hugged me, and told me not to worry. And I fought back my tears as hard as I could, but I couldn’t.
The Mexican woman. It was her property my dad plowed through. We don’t like them either. That’s because her husband owns a landscaping business. Their house is on the corner. And he parks his huge truck and trailer not in front of his house, but on the side of house … right in front of our picture window. So, we hate him. It seems logical. They have three children who play in their large yard all the time. What a massive tragedy it would have been had they been in the yard at the time! I can’t imagine how incensed they must be. Except … they were not. I walk into the yard to survey the damage. The lady comes out. I immediately walk over to her and profusely apologize. She would hear none of it. “No need to apologize. These are just things. They can easily be replaced. I said a prayer to God and thanked Him that our children were inside this morning. And I say a prayer that your father is OK. No, please do not apologize. Please let us know how your father is. OK?”
The cops. First, I suspect that they could have given my dad some kind of citation, but they didn’t. They were exceedingly polite. They did what they could to try to console my mom. They told me if there was anything I needed, or if there was any way they could help, to not hesitate to call. One cop asked me if I needed phone numbers and contacts regarding any social services for mom.
So, around 8PM we’re back home from the hospital, and I hear a knock on the door. It’s that cop. He says, “I’m sorry to bother you folks at this hour. I just got off duty and since your mom was so upset I thought I’d just check up on her. I didn’t know you’d be here. I hope I didn’t disturb you.” I invited him in. We talked for about ten minutes. He said that he and the other officers dubbed my dad “The Miracle Man”. He said he’s seen far less serious accidents where the driver wasn’t killed, or severely injured …. especially considering my dad’s age. So, as he left, he thanked ME, and reached out to shake my hand, and again said, “Don’t forget to call us if you need us.” I closed the door in utter astonishment.
I went to the hospital …. the very same hospital where they took mom after her fall down the stairs just last year … but this time it was dad who was all bruised and banged up, looking so sad and forlorn. The first thing he asked me was, “Why am I here? What happened?”. The nurse told us this short-term memory loss is a common thing, and not to worry. Well, they took x-rays and brain-scans. “Your father is an extremely lucky man. Other than his facial and head cuts (all superficial) he’s just fine. You can take him home in a couple of hours.” Holy crap.
I can only conclude that it’s hard to kill old Austrians, male or female.
A black woman, a Mexican woman, and six cops. I wonder if they all would have been this nice if they read some of the shit I have posted here. Probably. Not everyone is as full of hate as I am.
Placing these people in my life ….. I think God has a wicked sense of humor.
Hey … El Coyote …. peace to you, my friend. I’m sorry for being an asshole.
Great post, Stucky!
I have never been able to hate people as a category, because I’ve had too many black, brown, or gay, or male, or female people, extend themselves for me when there was nothing in it for them.
It never pays to be a hater, and nobody is more damaged by hatred, than the hater himself. Hating and anger are unhealthy, and will ruin your physical health as well as your spiritual well-being.
Well Stucky, how does it feel to be infused with a boat-load of unexpected humility.
Glad your pop is OK, and I like your neighbors.
Thanks, Chicago. I didn’t want to usurp Admin’s excellent “Home is where the heart is article” … but, it’s his website, and I never argue with his decisions.
Anyway, I called Dad this morning. He’s feeling fine. I said, “Why just fine? Why not GREAT?”. He said (really), “I’ll feel great after I have some German beer later.” And he really means it. Ha!
Ms Freud asks “What do you want to do for Father’s Day?” I want a big fat juicy prime rib, and see the new Jurassic movie in 3D. So, later we’ll go to Charlie Brown’s. I hope the movie is worth the fifteen bucks.
” … how does it feel to be infused with a boat-load of unexpected humility” —– kokoda
Pretty much something like this;
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Great post Stucky.
Not to state the obvious, but it sounds like your dad should stop driving. We’ve had to deal with this with several relatives and it is not easy, but is necessary. In each case it was ultimately prompted by a car accident that didn’t seriously hurt anyone but was not understandable or excusable in terms of the cause.
Persnickety
We haven’t talked about that yet with dad. But, my sister, Ms Freud, and myself believe that will be the eventual outcome. Neither parent being able to drive … that loss of mobility and independence … it will be a difficult pill to swallow, and will involve more work for us (not that it matters … it doesn’t) …. but, the alternative,…. killing himself and/or others, is a most horrible one. Life changes. Adjustments must be made. Just the way it is.
Chicago……When my son was young and had developed a negative against blacks (personal incident occurred), I explained to him never hate a race, but you can dislike/hate individuals. Myself, I never hated anyone until Obama. Disliking is fairly easy – there are always people that are just plain no good – just don’t socialize with them and then you don’t develop negatives that affect your daily life.
Stuck
My son saw Jurrasic World and said it was awesome.
I’m glad your Dad is alright. My mom had two accidents in the space of three years. Both her fault. She totaled the car last time. My brother bought her a newer used car. She shouldn’t be on the road, in my opinion.
I fear old people on the roads more than teenagers.
My sis and I are considering this as dad’s next vehicle of choice;
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I hate to say it but the insurance companies will probably make some choices for your folks, either through policy cancellations or massive rate hikes…
I treat people as I would want to be treated. I have written posts that criticized groups–those groups with a racial or cultural axe to grind. I do not apologize for my posts as they are based on FACT. On an individual basis, I am friends with people of ALL persuasions. Friendship with me ends when anyone attempts to use a “race card”–or to accuse me of having “white privilege”…game over…
About senior driving.. the central tragedy of this country is that we’ve trashed our cities and built so much car-dependent sprawl, that people have no choice but to drive.
I was ready to pay some lowlife to steal my mom’s car and wreck it, so deteriorated were her skills toward the end, which is what a male friend of mine had done with his dad’s car. When the insurance check came, he said Dad, you don’t want another car. Go take a vacation in Florida with the money. Happily, my mother’s newer Caddy was such a lemon that she didn’t trust it, so she had my sis drive her any place more than a half mile away.
Glad to hear no one got seriously hurt Stucky! I’m with everyone else commenting about hating people based on race. I’ve never had a need for that and I’d have missed getting to know some very decent people if I had.
I agree with VegasBob, once the insurance companies find out what the cause was, it will be difficult or expensive to get insurance.
that was a great post, glad everyone is alright. sounds like your parents won the ‘good neighbor lottery’. we should all be so lucky. funny how things change your perspective.
I’m glad everyone is ok. Stuff can be replaced or repaired should you want to. Went through the car thing with my stepfather a few years back, it’s never easy.
It has been my experience that one on one people for the most part are ok. Groups not so much….
I should be the one to apologize. I thought of you a few moments before coming to the site. I thought you are a good son to your parents and I fall far short of your efforts and you write great stuff. I had a sense of humility that made me swallow hard over my criticism of your frank and honest exploration of religion.
As a matter of fact, I thought, if old Stucky dedicated a bit of his learning to a book, folks could learn a thing or two about the bible. I have learned so much from your writing and it hasn’t diminished my faith. I misunderstood your purpose and really fucked up when I addressed that error, sorry.
It’s nice to hear that Americans still cherish some traditional values: nobody in his right mind would fuck with old folks or little kids (which is probably why Mayberry is populated with both types). I don’t really believe I actually know folks here by their comments here but I get a glimpse of people’s lives without peering into windows. Billy offered up a great picture of a charging cavalry that he added smart editorial comments to. That is what I look for here, stranger’s lives shared with editorial commentary.
Keep up the great work, Big Dog, there’s a doggy treat waiting for you upstairs, I’m sure.
Maybe its because I live in the South but how do you go so many years without knowing your neighbors? I’ve known every single one of my neighbors everywhere I’ve lived.
1. The car was not insured, therefore, no insurance increase.
2. They are the parent’s neighbors, not Stucky’s.
Stuck,
Scary and fun read. Yes, as you age your driving skills go away fast. I use to be a A+ driver, now I don’t drive at night, and gladly let the wife drive anytime she wants.
Glad your Dad is OK.
Glad everything worked out so well for your family.As my grandparents got older they lost their driving privileges one after another.. IT was hard for them but They managed ok with family around.
I do judge by groups and I am surprised when people performed about my expectations.It’s hard not to
Lump everyone together. I guess God does have his ways of humbling us
See El Coyote ,I told you Stuck has a big heart and would come around.
It really is nice to hear a real experience showing there is love in the world.
Glad your Pop is dinged and bruised and healing and hopefully a little wiser. The lesson here goes far beyond whether he should stop driving. The whole thing put a big fat dent in your personal animosity toward the world and cop-fucks and bad people living therein.
That second lesson is more valuable than gold as I am firmly convinced that the vast majority of people (of all colors, upbringing, life experience, et al) are, down deep (and sometimes not so deep) really good, caring and honest.
In our community of 500-600 people, over eighteen years, I’ve seen so many more good deeds done for neighbors (including ones you don’t know well – know where they live and their dogs name but not much more) that in any other location we’ve lived in around the world.
Doesn’t mean there aren’t assholes or three mixed in – we personally give everyone a shot at being social and if they don’t reciproicate, we just let them go their way and we go ours.
You’ve benefited in insight a lot, Stuck -Growing old sucks in a lot of ways and along with the worry and pain of caring for elderly parents comes insight and growth for yourself. Good luck and best to both your Mom and Dad.
MA
Jesus! This site is becoming a haven for excellent life stories and individual victories…damn I was lucky to find it.
Well this was a great piece and a timely reminder in these crazy days that we need to be frugal with our dislikes; and save ’em for special occasions! 🙂 Obama and his ilk are deserving of our contempt, sure, so no worries there, but it’s heartening to be reminded by experiences such as Stucky’s that the everyday person in our neighborhood may indeed be just that -an everyday good person. And it needs reinforcing that goodness, kindness, and a respect for others is colorblind (mind you, so is ignorance and stupidity – but I digress).
I’m glad I read this piece this morning; it’s put me back on the right track for the week. Thanks Stucky 🙂
Stucky, I had to take away mom’s car years ago. Tried to make it more about her not being able to use it. Explained it did her no good to drive if she could not get out of it on her own. She finally agreed, of course I also agreed to take her out 2x a week if she wanted, and she pretty much held me to that for a few years. Realistically, by the time we got her out she was already dangerous on the road, did not pay good attention, and swerved over lane lines all while telling us how good a driver she was… sigh.
As to hating a race, well, when I was a teen I worked around some black folk. Growing up in a pretty lilly white hood, that was my first real exposure to them on a regular basis. I got to know a woman named Travis well enough to ask her about the word ‘nigger’. she gave me her perspective (as a black woman) that I adopted the rest of my life. She said there are black people, and there are niggers, and good black people want nothing to do with low class, trashy niggers any more than most white people. She also said in her view, whites could be niggers too, just by the way they acted. And I have to agree completely. I’ve known ‘black people’ and seriously enjoyed them, and been around ‘niggers’ and never want to be near any of them.
As to hispanic people, well, I have never had any problems with any of them, and besides the gang stories, I generally seem them as a pretty good group of [people.
It never helps to hate any group, but there are always individuals who deserve hate for their actions. Sadly so…
Sounds like your family dodged a bullet, so to speak. Glad to hear it and that your Dad wasn’t seriously injured. But I agree with the “he needs to hang up his driver’s license” crowd.
d – when I was in 6th grade I hade a black friend who also taught me that niggers could be of any color.
Stuck, my admiration of you goes up every time you write an article. Keep it up!
Stuck – glad all will be ok.
Your dad should never drive again. He left it a day late.
The one thing you have said many times that I always was disturbed by was that whenever you heard of cop being killed, you rejoiced. I always felt that was not good.
I hate cops. Not the people who are cops, but what the job does to them, and what they become. Cops are generally fine folks when they are not being cops, and 90% of the time even when they are being cops. It is just that 10% of the time that causes all the problems. I would never rejoice at the death of a cop.
Sounds like you have had a change of heart. I think that is indeed very positive.
And it is terrific the experience you had with the neighbors. For years they may have not liked the “Germans” across the street. Now it is a neighborhood, not just a bunch of houses.
Again, glad all will be ok. Sorry about the old car. It is just a thing, in the end. Your dad is what was valuable in that crash.
We have a set of black neighbors and a set of white ones. The black kid helped me shovel snow. The white ones have six vehicles, most times partly in front of our driveway, a pack of loud neglected horribly behaved dogs, and a new basketball hoop next to our bedroom window so I can get even less sleep.
Bwt, it might be time for Dad to give up the keys BEFORE he kills someone.
Stucky – I am very thankful that your dad is fine and that what could have been a tragedy is just property damage and a few cuts and bruises. You are so lucky to still have your parents and they are lucky to have such a good son. There is a lump in my throat from your post and I hope all the “Dads” here at TBP had a great Father’s Day.
Oh god! A 1973 280….I had that exact pile of shit…..it was the first car I ever bought with my own hard earned money. It had the M110 engine, and just rusted, and rusted, and rusted….those cars were just awful about rusting all to hell and back. In order to fit the M110 into the compartment originally only designed for a 4 cylinder, the 2 firewall braces were eliminated. If this car was hoisted into the air on a regular lift a few times, you could see creases forming on the inside of the firewall where the 2 frame members were trying to tear away from the firewall. These cars were notorious for killing the occupants when the floor pans rusted (which they always did), and were estimated to have only about 25% of their front end impact strength upon impact. The floor pan underseal concealed the fact that these cars typically rusted severely from the inside out, and in my case, the drivers seat suddenly sagging to the left gave the first clue.
The front left door pillar foot (where it met the rocker panel) had a teeny little piece of pipe welded to it to fit the jack. I remember putting the jack in to jack up the car to see what was the matter, and having the fender about a foot higher, and the tire and not left the ground! Then I discovered the problem…..the Left Front door pillar foot and just dissolved into crumbs. There was no way to tell this from looking at the bottom of the car.
Old Bird should be so glad to be alive!
Did he have the vacuum powered door locks?
Mine had a Solex 4 barrell also: nice engine, but chassis was pile of shit! Power windows were very rare on German cars at time also. I had the ‘locking’ anteannae which required a little key to unlock it and thus prevent vandals from breaking it off.
Fond memories.
I’m sorry, I see now after re-reading that he hit the Mercedes, and was not In it. It still brings back bittersweet memories of my first car bought with my own money. Nothing quite ever compares to that. My second was a 1977 Mk V Lincoln.
So sad about the rear end wreck, there are very few of those cars in existence today. I still recall the little tow ring (on the right side only) welded to the bottom of the spare tire well. It also had a plastic fuel expansion tank in the trunk. It is really amazing just how much of that car I still remember!
Well, we went to see Jurassic THIRTY MINUTES early … and it was sold out. So, we went to Barnes & Noble and I read a book about dinosaurs. Then they closed 30 minutes after we got there. A great day!! lol
k
The Benz has spent every evening of it’s 43 years in a garage. Also, neither the original owner nor my dad drove it when there was snow or salt on the ground. Plus, I used various cleaners, polishes, and waxes annually to make it shine like glass. I also annually cleaned by hand the engine and under-carraige by hand. So, I hope you believe me when I say it didn’t have a single grain of rust … at least none that was visible. Everything work in the interior, and it looked factory new.
No … it had manual locks. The heavy doors had no sag, and closed with a distinctive thud. The engine just purred … nothing sounds like a Benz engine. Thanks for posting your memories. I enjoyed it.
Hey … we have similar tastes! I had a red(ish) 1995 Lincoln Mark VIII …. fully loaded with everything. God, I loved that car. Then some asshole rear-ended me going at least 40mph on the George Washington Bridge … and that was the end of that.
“Sounds like you have had a change of heart. ” —- Llpoh
Your instincts are correct. Neither will I go bat-shit crazy and/or vote thumbs down whenever someone says cops in their town are OK, or similar testimonies. Life changes. One must adjust.
I still reserve the right to use my patented “copfuk” whenever copfuks DO act like … well, … copfuks.
You know that wrap around bumper was only used that one year. I may know a shop (I live down here in dixie) that still may have my old one after I parted the car out. The chrome/nickel plating was still in excellent condition.
Interiors in those cars were TOUGH. MB made some great plastic back then.
It probably actually did have some rust that you didn’t know about….those cars were painted after the plastic interior underlayment was stuck on, so if you life up the carpet, and start peeling back the underlayment, you will see that the steel was not painted Before the underlayment, but After. If you did not get out in rain however, you have have had a very rare specimen.
If you never knew what those giant circular punchouts underneath the back seat (that are glued in with seam sealer) were for, they were drains….MB’s were still phosphotized prior to painting back in those days by chassis dipping. An extravagant operation that would not be practiced today.
I have also seen the little stamped ecoutrement that holds on the accelerator pedal fairly rusted from snow melting down ones shoe as they got in the car. This seemed to be a particular irritation point, as i had observed these repaired (or missing) in many junk speciment.
If yours was like mine, it had Power Sterring by Vickers, and Air conditioning by YORK. It would freeze your ass out. Climate change was completely mechanical, it used a thermocouple driving an expasion valve. It worked so well!
How I miss those days!
I should also mention that those doors would never sag because the hingers had such broad surface contact. The 77 Lincoln doors were heavy, and hung from 2 teeny little piece of shit bronze bushings on 5/16 rod stock…Ford never could figure out a door hinge.
The lincoln was loaded with automatic headlamp dimmer and all! It went up and down the road dimming at stop signs, reflectors, and all.
” …. sorry.” ———– El Coyote
OK. No problem. Let us speak nor more of it. It is water under the bridge.
Neither shall I again “un-friend” anyone else here whom I consider a TBP friend …. not over the bullshit or even good shit we argue about. When I think about it, I’m embarrassed about the silliness of that. lmfao.
Nevertheless, I reserve the right to get into a good shit-fest with you, Llpoh, and anyone else who dares to question my beloved opinions. I am NOT throwing out a damn fine TBP tradition!!
Oh I remembered the Benz had the little knobs that opened the vent windows via wormscrew regulators, and the Lincoln had Power Vent Windows! Damn I wish I could go back to those days….
Stuck – the problem with your beloved opinions is that, well, they are so often wrong. We will keep edumacating you as required.
“Maybe its because I live in the South but how do you go so many years without knowing your neighbors?” —- Stephanie
It wasn’t always like that. When we first moved here we knew practically every neighbor in a three block radius by name.
What happened? My guess is that as the State of New Jersey, as well as our township, became;
— 1) more crowded,
— 2) more integrated (my high school graduating glass of 400+ had only two blacks),
— 3) AND as this joint turned into a bedroom-community for the NYC crowd,
— 4) and as a result people moved in and out much more frequently (I don’t think there’s another family within 10 blocks that have lived in their homes for 50 years as my parents …. or, actually, even ten years) …….
… well, I think all that contributed to folks just retreating into their own four walls …. a typical Noo Joisey “just leave me the fuck alone” attitude.
To all who made so many wonderful comments … (except the Injun @9:59PM) … thank you very much. Good stuff. Good stories. Good advice.
I got to keep my dad at least one more day …. the best Father’s Day ever.
Be back tomorrow. Have a good night!
Yes, my Mom had 5 wrecks in 8 years. It was really a bad deal to get the keys pried away from her.
Really, what books on Christanity and Existentialism are there between the TD Jakes and Richard Dawkins aisle? You oftentimes are the middle ground between two extreme opinions expressed on TBP – it’s a wonder this site hasn’t broken out into a holy war.
That is a good vacuum to address. It would be a shame to let your personal account and enormous learning go to waste as far as the greater public. Yours is the balanced approach so lacking between these two extremes. In a way, you have been writing this book on the installment plan here.
k says:
Yes, my Mom had 5 wrecks in 8 years. It was really a bad deal to get the keys pried away from her.
_____________________________________
My grandfather, on my dad’s side, loved to drive. As he became old and feeble in his late 80’s, he would drive very slow. One day a cop pulled him over, deemed him unfit to drive anymore and took his license. It broke his heart.
Stucky …. Glad your dad is fine. Your family has some decisions to make about him being behind the wheel. I think the most poignant and valuable comment in this thread for everyone on TBP is the very first one from Chicago999444.
“It never pays to be a hater, and nobody is more damaged by hatred, than the hater himself. Hating and anger are unhealthy, and will ruin your physical health as well as your spiritual well-being.”
I honestly believe that, True hatred is corrosive to your health and will in fact often make the hater mentally unstable.
But there ARE healthy outlets for hatred. Let me give you an example ……..
Admin’s choice of songs he posts on this site. These songs are generally so awful, they are beyond contempt. He has a tin ear. This is not fit material for a grade school website. We must stand united in opposing and hating this trash.
SSS
I’m filled with the Holy Spirit this morning, so I won’t kick your ass. Learn to love Green Day. Learn to love wacky weed. Learn to love shooting 20 over par. I thought of you when Dustin Johnson choked on the 18th hole last night at the Open.
Stucky……glad your Dad is OK, and your experience with his neighbors and the cops was pleasant despite the circumstances. It also restored my faith in people, too. Thanks for sharing with us TBPers.
Stucky, let me remind you of why you hate copfuks.
https://youtu.be/u8mortvncDc
That was a great story. Thanks for sharing it.
Stucky – Prayers to your family and father. One thing about NJ, we have us some great hospitals and caregivers. Sorry your family lost those beautiful woods to McMansions. After work today and chemo for the wife I will drink a shot of Jamieson for you and your Dad.