There’s a dozen fresh roses on the dining room table.
So, after telling Ms. Freud all about my adventures in NYC yesterday with TBP’s Finest, we went to bed.
This morning she told me about her Stucky-less day. I asked about the roses.
She went to the indoor Farmers Market. She pays for her fruits and vegetables. The cashier hands her the bouquet; — “The man in front of you bought them for you, and he said, ‘A lady like that deserves flowers’. Reluctantly, she takes them. She goes outside, and he’s there.
He’s probably in his 60’s. He gives her a story about his wife recently dying. Says that he’s afraid he’ll never fall in love again, because his wife was so wonderful. Said that Ms. Freud reminded him of her.
He gave her his business card. Then asks her if they can “get together in the next week, just to talk“. No questions from him at all regarding Ms. Freud’s “availability”. Ms Freud says, “No, I’m not available for that!“, and attempts to pay him for the roses (which he refuses), and she hurries off to her car. “Please call me!“, he cries out after her.
He’s a motherfucking lawyer … a Joo lawyer judging from his last name … right here in our town.
I am so MOTHERFUCKING LIVID right now that I could literally beat the shit out of this turdfuk just short of his life. It’s a goddamn good thing today is Sunday.
But, tomorrow is Monday. I have his office hours. I haven’t yet decided what I will do …. but I will do something. I’m a relatively quiet guy … but, I’m not a pussy. He’ll find that out tomorrow. I just don’t know to what extent.
Ms. Freud bought plenty of cucumbers. I’m thinking of shoving them up this fuckers ass … sideways.
.
What would you do?
A wee bit ironic having the cops handle your business, no?
starfcker
Very very very much so. lol
I’m guessing you won’t use the term copfuk today. 🙂
Iska Waran
We’re good. Looking back, I see the humor … and it IS funny. I’m not just saying that.
AT THE TIME of the first reading, my internal “humor meter” was at absolute zero. That’s on me. Keep ’em coming … I greatly enjoy your posts.
A real man would walk right down there and kick him in the fuck ( to quote an infamous line I read somewhere). Everyone else would ask “what would you do?”
@Stucky
— “When the guy accosted her…”
You sound like a tumbler feminist.
If your revision to the original phrasing is true, then fair enough regarding why the roses made it home. Your original phrasing doesn’t paint remotely the same picture but I won’t pick it apart.
Stucy- In the future, you just need to keep the “dishy” Ms Freud on your arm everywhere you go. You do plan to take her to the TBP get together at HSF’s next year ?
You are not exactly the most popular resident down at the Chatham Police Dept. which would be reason enough for me to stay the hell off their radar. Just imagine how much pleasure the CPD would have smashing your head into a wall and then swear that you fell down.
Shoulda brought her along Stucky. Just sayin!
Stuck –
First, life is too short for this bullshit. You do not have time to file creep charges on every creep.
But do call his office. If he is not head swinging dick, maybe speak to head dick and mention how one of their shysters is hanging around stores creeping out women and passing out business cards while so doing. The head swinging dick will love to know that is happening. Maybe go stand at the guys office passing out fliers telling the patrons what happened. Etc.
If he is head swinging dick, threaten to report him to the bar. Or maybe do so. Pass out fliers. Visit his office and make a scene. I once walked into a big accountants office, into the boardroom where he was giving a proposal to a board, right past his secretary, and abused crap out of the guy. He turned white as a sheet and started drooling, and I kid you not.
You guys are amateurs. Ever so often I have gotten real pissed at someone and decided to get them fired. Each someone has gotten fired. But you gotta mean it. To fuck someone over takes time and effort. It takes a slow, steady burn. It takes creativeness and a mean streak.
Venting is one thing. I think Stuck s just venting.
But if he really wants to fuck the guy over, then fuck him over. There are many ways to get it done. Being really mad does not get it done, though. You gotta to be more dedicated than that.
If I ever need someone fucked over, I’m hiring Llpoh.
Stucky says: The day she says “Hey, I found a better Austrian.”, is the day I leave, without fanfare. So, “jealousy” is bullshit.
Whose the pacifist pussy now?
Even the most pacifist of pussies (me) will stare down an incursion on his woman.
Which reminds me of the time I went to see some financial guy. His secretary had a rack like Mt Rushmore, monumental. He had to shove the papers in my face to get me to unlock my lasers. All this time I have considered him an asshole but after reading your story I think that was his old lady.
Admin – I rarely go feral. But when I do, folks do not even know I am pissed off. You have to be calm to really fuck over someone.
A long time ago, I beat shit out of a guy for doing something similar to what Stuck describes above. I took a few licks in the process. An old friend of mine, veteran of Korea, asked why I had not just kicked him in the head if I was so pissed off. He was right – I was not that pissed off after all. I was just a little pissed off, and screwing around got me hurt a bit.
So now I walk away, almost always. But if I get really pissed I kick them in the head, or equivalent, by getting them fired, etc.
If you are serious, be real serious. If you are just kinda mad, but not so mad you would kick them in the head, get them fired, see them lose their house, etc., then walk away.
I do not think Stuck is real serious. If he is, he should leave the cops outta it. And he should definitely not touch the guy, given he has put it in writing.
Do a background check on the guy, (Llpoh could help I bet) if he is telling the truth send him flowers with a note to look elsewhere.
If he’s lying, I bet you won’t need any help in a proper course of action.
Stucky, to Mrs. Freud’s tormentor you can recite this wonderful verse penned by TS Eliot:
“The rats are underneath the piles. The Jew is underneath the lot.”
Since he is a romantic kind of guy, surely he likes poetry.
Note to self, don’t fuck with llpoh.
Normally I would say that if you don’t start any shit there won’t be any shit. But in this case it is pretty obvious from your description that his ultimate goal is to tap Mrs. Frued. He gave her his digits and wanted hers in return. Were these the actions of a desperate grieving man or the practiced calculated routine of a predator? Fuck him up. If he turns out to be a griever you can always say sorry. This guy sounds like a Bill Cosby type predator or the Bill Paxton character in ‘True Lies’.