WAL-MART FREAKS OF THE WEEK

Or #.

“Pretty in Pink” doesn’t apply to the areas sticking out of the pink.

Ahhh yes, St. Patrick’s Day. Where we commemorate Saint Patrick and the arrival of Christianity in Ireland by a bunch of Americans getting piss-drunk wasted on green beer and throwing up some corned beef and cabbage. 

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I feel like this is just the adult version of kids getting stuck in the crane games when they crawl up to get the prize.

Just because “mini” is in the name doesn’t mean it’s going to defy science and magically fit.

You look like you’re trying out to be the mascot for a fictional taco company. Los Pollos Locos isn’t interested brother.

The only life saver I can toss this dude who went overboard is that when you look back at them, there isn’t a single high school senior photo shoot that looks good. They’re all ridiculous; some just more than others.

You know it’s gonna be a good mother trucking day when you get a Willy The Pimp spotting. Let your pimp walk away today everyone!

Sure there may be snow on the ground but it’s still Spring Break bitches!!!!!!

I see someone had a life changing moment after watching the Trolls movie.

The lesser known and even more avoided member of the White Stripes.

Damn girl. We’re about to witness a power squat that might set world records. What those records are for, I’m not quite sure yet, but something is gonna get broke. I can assure you that.

Really? Still in 2017 we have Elvis impersonators? I wouldn’t stop my shopping for the real Elvis let alone some guy dressed like Elvis from the 60’s.

So I’m gonna go ahead and call photoshop….right?

How would you like toupee sir? Cash or credit?

Putting off a very ‘The Dude’ vibe there brother. But ahhh, that’s just my opinion man.

Ohhh no, this is gonna turn out real ugly when I turn the microwave on. Sorry PETA.

Kinda wanna see a Walmart employee pull a Chris Pratt in Jurassic Park and tame these wild dinosaurs with his alpha dominance stance.

See more freaks at People of Wal-Mart