Thou Shall Not Pass . . .

Guest Post by Eric Peters

This country is painted over with double yellow bars – a sort of rolling-ribbon prison, from which escape is not possible. Legal passing zones – always rare – are becoming almost nonexistent. Painted over – for no readily discernible reason.

Well, actually, there is a reason:

It is the purposeful discouragement of active – as opposed to passive – driving. This to pave the way for automated cars. To acclimate people to soporific transportation. To get them used to being meatsacks.

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Superficially, the effacing of passing zones is justified on the claim that the act is inherently unsafe – and within the straightjacket idiocy of the laws as they exist, this is absolutely true.

Car “A” is moping along at 42 in an (underposted) 45 MPH zone. The driver of car “B” (and cars “C” and “D” stuck in the conga line) would like to proceed at a reasonable speed – at least the speed limit. But – legally speaking – the act of passing car “A” is almost an impossibility.

To do so would require temporarily exceeding the speed limit of 45 MPH – at least, if it is to be done safely.

To perform it legally means attempting to pass car “A” – traveling at 42 MPH – at a pace no faster than the maximum speed limit of 45 MPH.

A difference of 3 MPH.

The passing car – if you can call it that – will need an eighth to a quarter of a mile, at least, to execute this slow-motion maneuver. Not many such straight stretches – free of traffic in the opposing lane – exist.

A legal pass is thus rendered effectively not-doable. Might as well paint it double yellow.

The safe pass, meanwhile, entails risking a ticket for “speeding.” Possibly – these days – a “reckless driving” ticket.

Catch 22.

Most people, therefore, do not even try to pass anymore. Whether nominally legal or not. Rather than risk the ticket, or attempt what is palpably unsafe, they will queue up in a conga, accepting their fate.

This is exactly as intended – the object of the exercise being to make driving a boring, frustrating experience such that most people will not miss it once it’s been eliminated entirely. Give them gadgets to peck, email to check. 

Why bother with driving when you can’t anymore?

This is why the young, especially, are largely indifferent to cars. There’s not much fun involved and very little in the way of freedom. Indeed, the opposite. Cars, to them, are a boring encumbrance. An expensive boring encumbrance.

It is also why the emphasis of new car design has shifted away from what the car can do – in terms of its performance capabilities – to the techno-gadgets it touts. To keep people’s minds off driving.

Which has come to suck – unless you drive like an outlaw. Few are willing.

And so, the slow-pokey.

Log-jammed traffic now exists almost everywhere – even in rural areas. Not so much because there are more vehicles using the road, but because of the soporification of drivers, who have been cowed into such a state of drone-like passivity as to approximate unconsciousness.

The light turns green and they eventually notice. The cars gradually creep forward – each invariably keeping exact pace with the car to its left or right.

None shall pass. Because most won’t.

It only takes one to jam up the works.

The systematic painting over of formerly legal passing zones is just confirmation of a fait accompli. It is of a piece with accepting that you’re 80 and can’t get it up anymore. Except in this case, the wilting is not natural but artificially imposed on a man of 35.

Once upon a time – it is hard to imagine this –  new cars touted their passing gear performance. Drivers were taught to use that performance.

One applied downward pressure to the accelerator pedal. The transmission would kick down – and the car would accelerate.

The object was to quickly – and so, safely – pass the slow-mover.

The slow-motion pass is a modern idiocy, along with the Pilot Car.

Well, idiocy is the wrong word given the intentionality behind it. From the point of view of the “nudging” technocrats behind it – the acolytes of Cass Sunstein, who are determined to render driving as much a part of the past as smoking (but high fructose corn syrup is just fine) it is working exactly as designed and so far from idiotic.

The technocrats are not stupid. They are making people stupid. it is an important distinction.

The corrective is simple.

The double yellow should be the exception, not the rule. Applied to the pavement in blind curves, perhaps. But otherwise? Passing should be legal whenever it can be done safely, which is most of the time – provided the driver is given leave to exercise his judgment, use his skill – this assumes he has some, of course – and is not punished for passing efficiently and safely.

Most would learn how – and those who couldn’t handle it could simply be . . . passed. Without the passer having to worry about a buzzcut government thug extorting a ransom from him.

Traffic would flow. Driving would be fun again.

This fantasy exists in actuality – in many European countries – where, despite the general suffocation of liberty, some remnants of the old ways remain, at least when it comes to driving. Which for the Europeans has ancestral charm.

Most roads over there are “pass at will” – broken yellow rather than double yellow. In these countries, the driver is still expected by custom as well as law to know how to drive.

People here are admonished that it’s “safer” to just sit behind the slow-mover – no matter how slow – and “be patient.”

The automated car is almost here.

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20 Comments
Trapped in Portlandia
Trapped in Portlandia
January 18, 2018 10:45 am

For 11 years I drove an unpowered Honda Civic with a stick. In that car I suffered the fate Eric talks about, i.e., being stuck behind slow drivers because I didn’t have the power to pass. Then in October I bought a BMW 428i with a bit more power. Slow drivers have ceased to be a problem. And about that double yellow line–I view it as a suggestion.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Trapped in Portlandia
January 18, 2018 1:24 pm

Many, maybe most or all, jurisdictions allow passing in a double yellow zone as long as it can be done safely.

Look up your local and State ordinances about it to find out if you are allowed to.

starfcker
starfcker
  Trapped in Portlandia
January 18, 2018 3:14 pm
kokoda the Deplorable Raccoon and I-LUV-CO2
kokoda the Deplorable Raccoon and I-LUV-CO2
January 18, 2018 10:53 am

Road Rage on the rise.

Robert (QSLV)
Robert (QSLV)

Do it all the time. Bagged an 8 point buck as a bonus one time.

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Robert (QSLV)

Conversationalist
Conversationalist
January 18, 2018 10:53 am

I have vaporizing phasers installed to deal with this situation. I used to be reluctant to use them on the three or four followers of the Clover in front, but then I realized that they could be proactive and pass if they had any nads.
Vaporizations have escalated geometrically since then. Sadly, now there are all these other Clovers out looking for the missing persons.
What have I done?

Dave
Dave
January 18, 2018 11:01 am

Maybe it’s just to slow down people who think they’re time is more important.

Iska Waran
Iska Waran
  Dave
January 18, 2018 11:37 pm

Where in Minnesota do you live?

A. R. Wasem
A. R. Wasem
January 18, 2018 11:33 am

I now treat all “public” road signs, etc. as “suggestions” only.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  A. R. Wasem
January 18, 2018 1:25 pm

Including minimum speed signs?

rhs jr
rhs jr
January 18, 2018 11:34 am

While driving about 60 mph on Hwy 90 West about 50 miles from Tallahassee, a car whipped out to pass in clear view about 150 ft ahead and I jerked my car into the ditch just as it flew by. My two passengers said they didn’t see it coming until we hit the shoulder. I began to really pay attention whenever a bad wreck was reported on the news and when the driver details finally came out, it was usually an intoxicated Black at fault. I also believe most accident scenes I’ve passed involved Black drivers. Show me the the statistics: are 13% of the people responsible for 50% of the wrecks?

Brian
Brian
January 18, 2018 11:39 am

If you’re going >5 MPH under the limit, I’m going right around you ASAP.
-5 to +5 of the limit, I’ll pass you eventually. +5 or more I’ll use you as my decoy.

Dutchman
Dutchman
January 18, 2018 12:15 pm

I’m from south eastern PA, near Philly. In the 60’s there were lots of ‘suicide’ highways – 3 lanes – the middle was striped for passing – if the dotted and solid line were on your side – you could pass. On hills they had double yellows in both directions.

Well….. always around holidays (like 4th of July, Labor Day) us guys would read the NY Daily News – to see what horrific pictures they had. There was one trucker carrying pipes – he must have stopped quickly – they had a picture of a pipe right through his chest. Good wholesome entertainment for 12 year boys!

Seems people never learn not to pass on a hill.

Martin brundlefly
Martin brundlefly
January 18, 2018 12:17 pm

Friends always comment about me passing on double yellow lines. I swear people are driving 43 in a 55 because the road winds. I drive it at 72 in cruise control. And thats a rural road with zero police. The main drag past all the shopping is 45 mph, and everyone drives that 30 because of all the lights. It takes me 20 minutes to get to wegmans. At 4am with no one on the road i can round trip, and shop and be home faster than the normal one way journey. I hate people. Part of the problem is shitboxes that wont accelerate at all. I had a rental last week that you had to floor to get moving. Junk cars and stupid people.

Miles Long
Miles Long
January 18, 2018 2:06 pm

Most people cant drive worth a shit these days. Many shouldn’t be behind the wheel of a car. Traffic laws are devised to keep the rest of us safe from the lowest skilled. I drive faster than most as a rule & have little good to say about those 35 in a 55, brake thru the curve, cell phone talking, non-driving motherfuckers as much as the next guy.

Check it out. Driving on public roads is a privilege rather than a right. No shit… really. Speed limits are maximum limits. Only on limited access highways are there minimum speed limits. Cross streets, high traffic areas, as well as vision limitations affect the dreaded double yellow. If you dont like it build your own roads.

Mr. Libertarian confuses his “right” to dance wildly while spinning around with outstretched arms and the end of my nose. Apparently asshole Eric has never been hit head on in his own lane by someone driving left of center when there’s either no time to react or nowhere to go to get out of their way. Trust me, at even 25 mph it ain’t fun. It’s exponentially worse at 55. Some days I’m very grateful for the simple action of being able to walk again. Making a mental note to not move anywhere close to Copper Hill… or check out getting some of those vaporizing phasers.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Miles Long
January 19, 2018 7:45 am

Peters is a special kinda super duper guy who really, really knows how to drive his Mustang really, really fast. Everyone else is just a really, really bad driver.
$100 says Mr Libertarian ass-clown will end up being impaled on his shifter before all is said and done.

Vodka
Vodka
January 18, 2018 2:49 pm

My state allows you 10 mph over the speed limit while passing. I suspect most other states allow the same. So it’s not a ‘catch 22’ to legally pass someone, but it is certainly not an allowance that law enforcement wants to highlight or promote.

garyb
garyb
January 18, 2018 3:04 pm

vote with your right foot!!!!

TC
TC
January 18, 2018 3:26 pm

I usually do 5 over and will pass at any opportunity. Sometimes in double yellow if I have to. I have noticed that a lot of the passing zones get changed to double yellow when the road gets repainted or paved, but I figured it was just safety nazis rather than conspiracy. Or maybe it’s easier therefore cheaper to just paint a double yellow.

Coalclinker
Coalclinker
January 18, 2018 7:19 pm

When driving on a 4-lane, I like the people who move quickly to the left lane so they can “pass” you. Then a long time later you decide you need to move to the left lane and you nearly side swipe them because they got and stayed in your blind spot.
Another kind of people I like are the ones that pass you while you’re driving on cruise control, and once they pass you immediately slow down causing you to either slow down, or speed up and pass them so you can get away from them. Then a short while later they do it again.
I love the people who move into the fast lane on a steep hill so they don’t have to be behind that
bogging-down semi, like everyone else, then drive along side the semi never passing it, damning the rest of this.
If you’ve ever driven on I-64 in West Virginia-bingo!
The ones you really got to watch are the ones who merge onto I-64 at 35 mph. You read about deaths up there all the time because of this curious habit. They also like to merge onto a 3 lane interstate at the same speed, then move immediately into the center lane. This is when you read of multiple car pileups and deaths.
You have to wonder that if cars could be only built with standard transmissions, no automatics, how many of these dangerous drivers could be kept off the road?