WAL-MART FREAKS OF THE WEEK

The wheels on the stroller…on the cart…go round and round, round and round… yeah, just not as catchy.

Click to visit the TBP Store for Great TBP Merchandise

When you live your life by your own rules and don’t let anyone tell you what you can or can’t do. I hope the splash back on that was worth it.

I get super annoyed by people that are too lazy to walk their stuff to their car and have someone park right out front in everyone’s way. This is just on the next level of that jerk move.

-----------------------------------------------------
It is my sincere desire to provide readers of this site with the best unbiased information available, and a forum where it can be discussed openly, as our Founders intended. But it is not easy nor inexpensive to do so, especially when those who wish to prevent us from making the truth known, attack us without mercy on all fronts on a daily basis. So each time you visit the site, I would ask that you consider the value that you receive and have received from The Burning Platform and the community of which you are a vital part. I can't do it all alone, and I need your help and support to keep it alive. Please consider contributing an amount commensurate to the value that you receive from this site and community, or even by becoming a sustaining supporter through periodic contributions. [Burning Platform LLC - PO Box 1520 Kulpsville, PA 19443] or Paypal

-----------------------------------------------------
To donate via Stripe, click here.
-----------------------------------------------------
Use promo code ILMF2, and save up to 66% on all MyPillow purchases. (The Burning Platform benefits when you use this promo code.)

Bruce Jenner out here inspiring an entire generation of athletes to dress in drag.

Hall Of Fame level on fleek. #AllNatural

Could this be any more accurate of an Elvis Impersonator? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE STOP! Don’t get me wrong, the dude changed the music game. But there are only like 7 people alive that still listen to Elvis. Go away.

Does your body good, but not the company’s bottom line. Hit the road.

Wowzers! Why even bother with the tattoos? It’s like hanging a bunch of those inspirational and motivational posters in the death row section at a prison. It’s not doing anyone any good.

Before we start angrily hurling words at him like “sexist” and “woman hater” and “something about MeToo”, lets take a moment to realize he boldly displays the fact that he is a redneck on his truck so set your expectations right at about the level he is at.

Cruella Deville looking like she bought stock in Botox to try and find the fountain of youth!

Wait, who’s taking a vote on this? Pretty sure for most of us that decision was already made for us and I for one appreciate not having to chose between a sharp object near my junk and having an anteater.

You laugh, but if someone randomly busts out some chow mein at Walmart you’re the one that will be standing there unprepared and hungry.

Woof. Ron Jeremy looks like he fell on some hard times.

4
Leave a Reply

avatar
  Subscribe  
Notify of
Stucky

Why can’t Putin launch cruise missiles on Walmart stores?

LGR
LGR

JOTD…

Good Friends & Golfing Reunions

Two guys grow up together but after
college one moves to Michigan, the other to Florida.

They agree to meet every ten years in Vero Beach to play golf.

At age 30, they finish their round of golf and go to lunch.

“Where you wanna go?”

“Hooters.”

“Why?”

“Well, you know, they got the broads,
with the big racks, and the tight shorts, and the legs …”

“OK”

Ten years later at age 40 they meet and
play golf again.

After golf, “Where you wanna go?”

“Hooters.

“Why?”

“Well, you know, they got cold beer and
the big screen TVs and everybody has a little action on the games.”

“OK”

Ten years later at age 50 they meet and
play again.

“Where you wanna go?”

“Hooters.”

“Why?”

“The food is pretty good and there is
plenty of parking.”

“OK”

At age 60 they meet and play again.

“Where you wanna go?”

“Hooters.”

“Why?”

“Wings are half price”

“OK”

At age 70 they meet and play again.

“Where you wanna go?”

“Hooters.”

“Why?”

They have 6 handicapped spaces right by
the door.”

“OK”

At age 80 they meet and play again.

“Where you wanna go?”

“Hooters.”

“Why?”

“We’ve never been there before.”

Kelly the Deplorable
Kelly the Deplorable

Ooh, ooh, I wanna leave a joke! It’s an oldie, but a goodie.

So this quite elderly lady gets pulled over for speeding by a young, New cop on the beat. Cop goes to get window & asks for her license.

“I don’t have one,” she says.

“Well ma’am, how about your insurance or registration?”

“Nope. I stole this car.”

When the young cop is obviously taken aback & asks who she stole the car from, the lady tells him she stole it from her neighbor, killing him in the process, and his body is in the trunk.

The young cop tells her to wait right there, backs away quickly, and radios a supervisor for back up.

The supervisor arrives, clearly skeptical of the whole story, and approaches the car. “Ma’am, do you have your license?”

“Of course, sir.” And she hands it to him from her purse.

“Well how about your insurance and registration?”

“Yes, sir. I keep both in a box in the trunk, your welcome to grab them,” and she pops the trunk open.

The supervisor opens the trunk, finds the box with the paperwork, and nothing else, in the trunk, and returns to the driver window, seriously confused.

“Ma’am, I’m confused. My rookie back there said you didn’t have a license, that the car was stolen, and that you had the owner’s dead body in the trunk.”

The lady rolled her eyes dramatically & says,
“yeah, I bet that lying bastard told you I was speeding too.”

Tennessee Budd
Tennessee Budd

So now “redneck” is a bad thing?
Oooh, sorry, it took me a minute. Envy. I get it now. I suppose inept, useless Yankee city-dwellers do that a lot. We hillbillies & rednecks don’t really spare the time to learn how, as we’re busy going competently through life.
He does deserve a bit of criticism: why the hell would he let his wife drive his truck? She’s got her own truck, I would think.

Discover more from The Burning Platform

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading