New Law Allows Parents To Abort Non-Viable Millennials

Via The Babylon Bee

RICHMOND, VA—A new law proposed by representatives in the Virginia state legislature would allow parents to abort their non-viable millennial children.

“Any child who’s 30 years old and still living with their parents is obviously a non-viable life form, and that’s between the parents and their doctor to discuss options,” said one representative defending the bill in the assembly. “The millennial can be kept comfortable in the basement while the mother decides if she wants to keep them. But that’s between her and her doctor.”

“Her basement, her choice,” he added.

Medical professionals can use early detection methods to try to spot signs of non-viability in the millennial’s development, like getting a useless college degree, eating quinoa and avocado toast, and wearing a man bun. But sometimes, parents just aren’t sure until very late in gestation, like by the time they are 30 or 35 years old and still haven’t gotten a job.

“At that point it’s a humane option,” a medical doctor who has performed dozens of millennial abortions said. “It’s a quality of life issue, not an issue of morality or murder.”

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11 Comments
22winmag - Q is a Psyop and Trump is lead actor
22winmag - Q is a Psyop and Trump is lead actor
February 4, 2019 8:23 am

Funny and not so funny.

There is hope for many Millennials and Gen-Zers.

If nothing else, many of them are well aware they are being lied to 24/7 and exploited financially.

They may have their issues, but knowing those two things is a solid base to build on, in order to free one’s mind.

TampaRed
TampaRed

what does your guru think about abortion?

TampaRed
TampaRed
February 4, 2019 8:33 am

a couple of years ago i was at lunch w/several guys & the subject turned to abortion–
an old retired atty in his 70s said”…i generally don’t believe in abortion but i sure as hell believe that a do over should be allowed between the ages of 14 & 22,it would sure as hell change those kids’ attitude.”

Pequiste
Pequiste
February 4, 2019 9:40 am

New York’s Governor Cuomo, thinks this a grand idea and will be mustering all the forces necessary; Liberal, Democratic, Demonic, and Republican; to get this legislation rapidly passed in The Vampire State.

avalon
avalon
February 4, 2019 9:53 am

Sorry, but this cracked me up ?

jimmieoakland
jimmieoakland
February 4, 2019 10:00 am

Finally, a sensible abortion law everyone can agree on.

Mangledman
Mangledman
  jimmieoakland
February 4, 2019 11:21 am

This is still a slippery slope if the progeny is white, male and masculine it HAS to go!! The cord to the kitchen may have been cut, and no longer living in the loving warmth of the basement, but suffering through life with such a debilitating mental illness, it would be the only humane thing to do. Besides this kind of insanity brings with it love of life and firearms, and protecting life. Let’s vote!!

overthecliff
overthecliff
February 4, 2019 10:31 am

When the SHTF,Mr.Darwin will start the abortions.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
  overthecliff
February 4, 2019 1:23 pm

Technically it will be a retro-active abortion.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
February 4, 2019 11:51 am

Once again the Bee is right on the money.

ConcernedCitizen
ConcernedCitizen
February 4, 2019 6:35 pm

Does this mean we can finally convince liberals that the dirt bag on death row convicted of rape and murder is not a viable human life and have him aborted retroactively?