Joe Biden Appointed As Head Of TSA

Via Babylon Bee

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Amid a flurry of accusations of inappropriate touching and crowding people’s personal space leveled at former vice president Joe Biden, President Trump announced Friday that Biden is his appointment to the Transporation Security Administration.

Biden will be tasked with showing TSA agents how to violate people’s personal space and privacy in their daily groping of American citizens. He already has “dozens” of charts and infographics he began to hand out to TSA workers all across the country, creeping up on them and gingerly setting the files in their hands as he whispered his instructions in their ears.

“Based on Biden’s skill getting inappropriately close to people and making unwanted physical advances, he is the perfect man for the job,” Trump said. “We’ve had our differences in the past, but I’m glad Creepy Joe and I can work together on this one.”

“He’s a very good toucher, one of the best.”

Trump reportedly considered himself for the position before choosing Biden, calling himself an “expert groper,” but he was informed he can’t be both president of the United States and the TSA Administrator.

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m.
m.

if jb can’t do the job, the genital groping agency can recruit from the pedo-appeasing-pope church

bob
bob

…when compulsion becomes a career.

Anonymous
Anonymous

sounds like some “from each according to his ability” BS … i prefer to abolish the TSA altogether tho ….

m.
m.

after abolishing, former tsa-types could apply to be priests…already trained, etc.

KaD
KaD
Anonymous
Anonymous

Does the Democrat Party have a branch in England now?

AC
AC

We could start sending his campaign HQ pairs of blue TSA gloves.

It might be possible to convince the media that Biden events will have TSA-style security screenings, conducted by Joe himself. Might make a good cartoon, too . . . .

Anonymous
Anonymous

Can’t wait to buy the T-shirt with Uncle Joe wearing his thin blue gloves.

I wonder how much coercing he had to do before Jill finally caved and gave that wacky interview of how he stirred her innermost feelings when they were dating.

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