In Brazen Act Of Aggression, Iran Deploys Its Country Right Next To Our Aircraft Carrier

Via The Babylon Bee

PERSIAN GULF—In what’s being called a dangerous act of aggression, the country of Iran has deployed its country right next to the USS Abraham Lincoln Carrier Strike Group, which was just minding its own business in the Persian Gulf.

“It is clear that Iran wants war,” said National Security Advisor John Bolton. “Our carrier strike group was just off on a pleasure cruise on the other side of the world, and Iran insisted on placing its country right next to it.”

“We will not stand for this kind of saber-rattling,” he said.

Bolton says the U.S. tried to use diplomacy. He stated that a diplomat was sent to Iran to ask nicely if they would consider moving their country away from our military forces and hundreds of bases around the world. Iran then claimed they couldn’t find any space on the globe that was a safe distance from the U.S. military.

“So as you can see, we tried to be reasonable,” said Bolton, shrugging. “This means war!”

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Southern Sage
Southern Sage

LMAO. Them durn furriners! How dare they threaten out peaceful warships!

Iska Waran
Iska Waran

We had the Axis of Evil. Then a month or two ago, Bolton declared Venezuela part of the Troika of Tyranny. Really. I think they should keep up with the alliteration theme. I’m thinking Duopoly of Demonism. That could be, maybe, Burma and Bhutan. We could have the Quadropoly of Queers: That’d be Canada, France (I’m thinking of their leaders), Key West and South Bend, Indiana.

overthecliff
overthecliff

War with Iran? If so we must take the glove off and kick their asses good. Kill a few million muzzies and devastate their land. Bombing mosques to the ground and bulldozing entire cities is a good idea. Never engage in a half assed war and make them afraid to even look in our direction for 7 generations. Since that won’t happen we should not go to war with Iran.

Anonymous
Anonymous

True, we should not go to war with Iran, and you should not be allowed within ten yards of pen and paper.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty

Again the Bee is more on top of the attitudes of our worthless government than anyone else in the media. I am sure that this is EXACTLY how the albino walrus and his orange-haired puppet are thinking.

gatsby1219
gatsby1219

The USN sends ships to the Med. every 6 months, nothing new.

I went in the early 80’s, under Reagan.

Anonymous
Anonymous

Those dirty bastards. Why is everyone always picking a fight with America? Too many haters, I guess.

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