Every morning in the smaller dining room, I put my hand on the raggedy old chair — the chair that Hardscrabble Farmer sat in — and I say, “Hi Munchkin! I love you and miss you so much. But, I’m happy for you, because I know you are surrounded by peace, joy, and love. Mind if I read you a poem?” And then I read her the poem below (haven’t yet read it to her without crying …. sometimes tears of sadness, but also of joy), and then I close with, “Smile on me, Munchkin. If you can … blow me a kiss. I’m sure I’ll feel it. I love you.”
I’m sharing this with you because it has meant SO MUCH to me. And who among our little TBP Tribe has not suffered the loss of a deeply loved one? I hope this brings you the comfortable peace it has brought me!
Oh … one more thing. Something phenomenal happened today. So much so that I can not yet write about it. Blew my mind. I’m still processing it. I’ll possibly write about it on Feb 4th, the one month anniversary of Maureen’s trip to The Great Beyond.
I love all of you.
=========================================== =
When Tomorrow Starts Without Me
When tomorrow starts without me,
And I’m not there to see.
If the sun should rise and find your eyes,
All filled with tears for me;
I wish so much you wouldn’t cry
The way you did today,
While thinking of the many things,
We didn’t get to say.
I know how much you love me,
As much as I love you,
And each time you think of me,
I know you’ll miss me too;
But when tomorrow starts without me,
Please try to understand,
That an angel came and called my name,
And took me by the hand,
And said my place as ready,
In heaven far above
And that I’d have to leave behind
All those I dearly love.
But, as I turned to walk away,
A tear fell from my eye
For all my life, I’d always thought,
I didn’t want to die.
I had so much to live for,
So much left to do,
It seemed almost impossible,
That I was leaving you.
I thought of all the yesterdays,
The good ones and the bad,
The thought of all the love we shared,
And all the fun we had.
If I could relive yesterday
Just even for a while,
I’d say good-bye and kiss you
And maybe see you smile.
But then I fully realized
That this could never be,
For emptiness and memories,
Would take the place of me.
And when I thought of worldly things
I might miss come tomorrow,
I thought of you and when I did
My heart was filled with sorrow.
But, when I walked through heaven’s gates
I felt so much at home
When God looked down and smiled at me,
From His great golden throne,
He said;
“This is eternity,
And all I’ve promised you.
Today your life on earth is past,
But here it starts anew.
I promise no tomorrow,
But today will always last,
And since each day’s the same way,
There’s no longing for the past.
You have been so faithful,
So trusting and so true.
Though there were times
You did some things
You knew you shouldn’t do.
But you have been forgiven
And now at last you’re free.
So won’t you come and take my hand
And share my life with me?”
So , when tomorrow starts without me,
Don’t think we’re far apart,
For every time you think of me,
I’m right here, in your heart.
======================
Poem by David M. Romano
Just a reminder to quit procrastinating and never let the day end without telling those you love that you love them. Live in today – not yesterday or tomorrow.
Can’t add anything as that poem kinda says it all. Good to hear from you and God bless.
What Unreconstructed said! (…and still praying for you bud)
Stucky, after awhile you will see UNMISTAKABLE signs that her spirit is still near to you, if you have not already. This will strengthen you as well as bring other emotions.
I am sorry for your loss.
You are so loved by so many angels. I know all of the ones hovering around me have been singing about a new one in their midst!
Like me, she has a special liking for a big lumberjack-looking dude we all call Stucky.
This one is my very bff who died just before Poppa G.
She and Munchkin are surely especially loved for their tolerance of the likes of you and I, Stuckenmeister.
She Walks in Beauty
By Lord Byron
She walks in beauty, like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that’s best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes;
Thus mellowed to that tender light
Which heaven to gaudy day denies.
One shade the more, one ray the less,
Had half impaired the nameless grace
Which waves in every raven tress,
Or softly lightens o’er her face;
Where thoughts serenely sweet express,
How pure, how dear their dwelling-place.
And on that cheek, and o’er that brow,
So soft, so calm, yet eloquent,
The smiles that win, the tints that glow,
But tell of days in goodness spent,
A mind at peace with all below,
A heart whose love is innocent!
is she the one who had “in christ alone” played at her funeral
So nice to hear from you Stucky!
Thank you for sharing that Stucky, glad I’m alone at work right now, damn, made me tear up too.
I love you too, StuckinNJ. And no matter what EC says, that ain’t gay.
What would EC know about gay? He’s a Latino stud, according to my friend Paulita.
At 5’4″ I’m more of a cripple than a stud.
Well, you’ve got Maggie wrapped. ?
and i have a cozy place in my lap for little dogs!
Well I’m 5’4″ too so… we can see eye to eye…..nose to nose…..toes to toes and so on…..
are you telling me its over
It’s just that my memory is shot through and through with lagoons and I can’t remember famous people’s names but one or two words will trigger a song.
you trying to steal ec from me?
you need to try for the shy trucker
I was not aware she is Little Red instead.
Are you telling me you don’t see the big change in women over the last three decades?
This is about the music, isn’t it?
is me, stucky… not being inappropriate, but bringing up an interesting aspect of the Little Red Riding Hood story.
What if Little Red was looking for the Wolf instead.
(Blessings you big lumberjack-looking dude. Paula means well, as do I. Most of the time.)
…
Am praying blessings in your general direction.
OUTSTANDING
*sniffle*
Hi Stuck – please take care of yourself. I am certain that is what Mrs Freud, and all of your TBP friends would want.
Amen to that.
The earth is flat, says my friend.
And the sky ends just a few miles above
Then my other friend says
There is no limit to love
No flatness there
Or dome to speak of.
The lord put limits to the oceans
The floor below and sky above
And land all around.
But he didn’t put a limit on love
Nor confined life to the ground
Love’s death is never seen
Romeo still loves Juliet
And Nick Maureen
and she, he…
Stucky,
Thank you for sharing. (tears in eyes) You continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.
Thank you for that poem Stucky. It’s a blessing beyond measure to know that the day is coming when we will once again be with those who have gone to be with Jesus ahead of us.
Man, you were just in my prayer yesterday, that HSF, or some other regTBPer had been checking in with you.
Can’t wait to hear what’s coming.
I’ve heard so many, simply unexplainable things from our families, over the years that have brought tears to my eyes…
I’m hoping the same for you.
Thanks for sharing Stucky,we all have been through what you as you mention but tis a individual road for each of us as is the path moving forward.
Will admit a bit intrigued by your teaser of a phenomenal happening and your sharing of it on the 4th of Feb.
Sir:
If interested, coincidentally A/C had a link to this article,
and counts himself as a believer.
Me, too.
And, yeah, good to hear from you.
Like the poem.
A lot.
Peace be with you.
http://endoftheamericandream.com/archives/after-investigating-1000-near-death-experiences-this-author-came-to-the-conclusion-that-life-after-death-is-very-real
Cliche of sorts, but the longing to spend just a lil’ more time with
a significant other who is no longer physically here with us…
Years ago I had a friend who was a preacher at what was then referred to as a “New Age” church, title which shall go unnamed, as not relevant for this.
He was like all in his position, asked frequently about what happened after death. I have come to expand his view a bit, but it is worth sharing for all here.
The laws of Physics, *as we know them now*, are that energy and matter cannot be created or destroyed, but merely change form.
The life force, spirit or soul, as we refer to it with our current understanding, is liberated upon death, and drops off the old worn out body like shedding a old suit of clothes.
This “spirit” must be intelligent as part of the universal mind, which we call God, Buddha, or whatever, is also pure energy, which, as as pure energy, able to travel at the speed of light. Remember the CIA had a multi year experiment,with dozens of people they trained to see distant places and forward in time! Guy in the program for years is on u tube.
Being intelligent and thus able to go anywhere, a realistic assumption is that it would hang around earth, where there are other life forms, water and air, looking for another entity to inhabit, to move a little further up the chain of higher and more interesting experience, when the opportunity came available. Human spirits would not want to move down to lower forms, like livestock, or other animals, for example.
When the fetus gets a heart beat, would seem to be a good time of entry, and maybe the parent selection and the fetus would work out well, or perhaps not so well?
There are numerous examples of out of body experiences at death, the reports of floating above the body, looking down on the body and going back into the body, etc. To numerous to be discounted as wild hallucinations. People coming back and reporting moving into a white light is common. Gary Busey the actor is reported to have been dead for 2-3 hours.
Now, consider the recurring child prodigy phenomenon. Mozart, and now the 12-13 year old girl writing symphony’s, operas, and other math and music talents. Where did that extraordinary skill come from is a proper question.
Blood Sweat and Tears tune: “I’m not scared of dying, and I don’t really care, but if it means the time of dying is here,……….when I’m gone there will be one child born to carry on.”
For sure the only way to know is to cross over.
“In the arms of an Angel you will find some comfort there”
Thanks, Stuck. I, too, am fond of raggedy old chairs.
Stucky,
That was lovely and I am heartened to be hearing from you, keep the faith, we love you too….
I am so glad, Stucky, to see your soul stirring, like a misty breath rising up on a clear cold morning as the sun begins to warm your face.
In a few years I’ll likely be in your shoes Stucky, as the doctors have informed us my husband’s prognosis for long term survival is poor and the chances of his cancer being back, soon, are fairly high. Of course doctors can be wrong but we’re putting things into a trust and getting documents set up, just in case.
Prayers for you during your trial.
God be with you and yours.
Peace brother. Reflection is good for the soul. Never stop remembering the beautiful person that made you happy. A great love is a truly a blessing. We all should be as blessed.
Stucky,
I was moved…no words fit…my very best.
What a beautiful, sweet poem. I’m sure we all wish we could give you a big group hug to help you through the heartbreak. Keep her in your heart ,she has you in hers… it’s all good. BL
Thank you Stucky . A beautiful word to your love one . Take care of yourself . I will be thinking of you in my prayers.
I keep a protective wall around me so no one can see me cry. I try to be other people’s emotional rock. No that’s not entirely true. I feel like I have lost control when I cry. I’m glad no one is around.
MC
You’re not alone.
The strongest among us have the softest centers.
That’s a beautiful poem, Stucky. I’m glad it brought you comfort. I hope you’re pain is easing a little. Still praying for you.
Can’t wait to see what you present to us on Feb 4.
Thank you. Thank you for sharing all of your grief & agony with a bunch of internet strangers. I had heard the other day that part of loving is also putting down your “load” and allowing others to help carry it. I suppose you are showing love to strangers by sharing your burden.
I am flying this weekend. The weather is not supposed to be good. I don’t fear flying, or death I suppose, but I know those around me would be sad. I am preparing a “just in case” envelope with accounts and passwords so that everyone will be ok. I will include that poem as well.
I hope you have great flying weather, dirtboy.
Safe travels
We all love you back, Stucky.
So very glad to hear the good vibe in your words.
Praying you will bask in God’s comfort during these hard days, Stucky.
Love from Gayle.
Beautiful.
Looking forward to your February news, if its awesome to Stucky, I’m sure it will be a life affirming revelation for the rest of us.
hey big guy,
we only met but you made me care in a big way
in tribal culture when you pray for someone you dont know but you actually do it like mags made me do it means more
its a covenant oath thing in indian lore
i am not in the picture but that kid at the dentist could be my daughter! theres a lot of blond indians in my family
just letting you know oklahoma is here
That is nice. Thanks…if he ever visits anywhere nearby we will Thelma and Louise our way to meet him.
I will hang onto the cash and the guns.
Maybe we will pick up Mary Christine and let her drive, hold on to the cash and the guns, as well.
You get me in trouble, Paula. Nick walked by and saw that old picture we used for your moniker here and now, I have to lay low until he forgets where he saw it.
“wuz that paula?”
No, honey… you only thought you saw our old network sys admin…
Hang in there Stuck.
Damn……….is it dusty in here? Reading that made me realize I need to make some changes…cause you never know….
Stuck, please forgive us for hanging out with you and bantering so. I know this time is filled with what my sister called – thoughts going everywhere. Being here for you also means being here with you, whatever you want to talk about or not talk at all. We are standing by.
What he said. No bickering on this one.
Unless you want us to bicker, in which case, it is EC’s fault, not mine.
Further to my previous comment, which those that did not read perhaps should, this just came out today. 1,000 folks surveyed.
http://endoftheamericandream.com/archives/after-investigating-1000-near-death-experiences-this-author-came-to-the-conclusion-that-life-after-death-is-very-real
Praying for Peace and comfort for you Stucky.
Know your lovely lady will watch over you until you can be together again.
Never fear your angel is near.
Outstanding, thanks for sharing.
I’ll write later, just got something in my eye
Stucky,
Thanks for posting this,it’s a comfort to me.
Early on the morning you posted this,Tuesday,the nurse at my dad’s rehab center went in & found him unresponsive.
The ambulance guys shocked his heart & got him to the hospital alive but even once the hospital got him on life support he got steadily worse.
The last sibling got into town & was able to sit with him for awhile so we had the plug pulled yesterday at 1:45 am & he breathed on his own until 5:15 am. I got home from the hospital too tired to sleep so I got onto TBP & saw your article.
Right choice,right time.
Thanks
Stucky, I’m glad you can find solace in such a beautiful poem. I lost someone close 10 years ago, and this song got me through the dark days. I still can’t listen without tears.
The maudlin men of an ex-people reminisce and turn their eyes and hearts to heaven. I understand the need to grieve, but this digital communal circle jerk is true art for the ongoing enormity. It may be necessary for a few as a few, but to make this virtue signalling is to make a social inculcation that is a death sentence to the younger men who will freeze in fear before the murderous enemy red hot. I ask the proprietor to limit his facilitation of this emotionalism so it’s value is not cheapened into defeat for kin. ‘Tis better to have loved and lost. Some of us have never had stable, certain, proven intimacy, and never will. Do you give a crap about us? Is winning on earth beneath your consideration? Your own religion says marriage is temporary. If a man does not have intrinsic meaning in himself, if he does not define his purpose or mission, what is he? You people following the feelz for the feelz is how the enemy took over our institutions and our lives. They drink your tears and will piss on your graves. We don’t need less experience with death but more. We are soft bitches. Enough already. To down vote this is to sign the death warrant on your so-called people. I’m not against the necessity of grieving, but some of us are still alive, and many will outlive us. We might want say in who that is. The biggest bleeding heart is the best heart? Not in this world. I am disgusted at the signalling feedback loop to ever greater heights. Do any of you folks have any sense of self-possession? Fake it when the impressionable youth are watching. Could you at least do that? Churchianity makes soy boys.