The Pump Jockey Employment Mandate

Guest Post by Eric Peters

One of the silliest and most obnoxious make-work laws on the books may soon be the law in Illinois. Maybe soon in your state, too.

It is already the law in New Jersey and Oregon  . . . where motorists aren’t allowed to pump their own gas. For saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaafety!

And for other things, too.

The proposed Gas Station Attendant Act – yes, really – reads as follows:

“No gas may be pumped at a gas station in this state unless it is pumped by a gas station attendant employed at the gas station.”   

This isn’t full-service. It’s being forced to pay for services many of us do not want – leaving aside the money.

In addition to being fleeced, you’re forced to let someone you don’t know and likely have no interest in knowing paw your car with his greasy mitts, maybe not-quite-tighten your gas cap (triggering the “check engine” light to illuminate and requiring an OBD scan tool to un-illuminate) while also probably spilling gasoline on your paint.

And it’s illegal to object.

Because it’s the law.

In NJ and Oregon, a motorist can be Hut! Hut! Hutted! by an armed government worker for pumping gas into their own car. There’s very little chance you’ll be burned to death – note that fires at gas stations where it’s still legal to pump your own gas aren’t a problem.

But you might just get shot if you dare to pump-it-yourself in New Jersey, Oregon – and soon, Illinois, too.

Pumping gas isn’t rocket science, of course – which precisely why rocket scientists aren’t hired to pump gas. Instead, a least-common-denominator, minimum wage flunky will do the honors – and maybe some other things, too. Maybe because he’s a lout. Maybe because he just doesn’t care. Maybe because he doesn’t like your Trump (or Bernie) for President bumper sticker.

But chiefly, because you won’t be allowed to say no.

The “service” he provides will be on his timetable – which will likely be more leisurely than yours. There will probably be fewer attendants than cars at times. If you’re in a hurry, too bad. At least it’ll make owning an electric car seem more reasonable.

The best part? You get to pay for it all, too!

Because that’s what government’s all about!

It “creates jobs”  . . . by forcing you to pay for “services.” Or those provided by its crony-clients, like the insurance mafia.

The chief sponsor of the Gas Station Attendant Act, State Rep. Camille Lilly recently Tweeted:

HB4571 is concept legislation that creates safety and convenience at the pump… The bill seeks to create options for self-service, service by gas station attendant, and jobs. Input is valuable to shape into legislation the people of IL desire.”

Italics added.

Leaving aside the maladroit construction, let’s consider the obvious fly in the soup. If, as Madame Lilly says, the Pump Jockey Mandate  “creates convenience” (of a piece with the teeth-grinding  injunction to “look for safety” that appears when you power up the LCD touchscreen in many new cars) then why the mandate? It is not necessary to mandate things for which there is a market – like convenience.

See 7-11. Or Amazon.

But it is necessary to mandate what people aren’t willing to pay for – precisely because it isn’t “convenient.” Like being a “customer” of the DMV’s.

How much will this inconvenience cost drivers in Illinois?

In New Jersey, where this obnoxiousness has been the law for many decades, the cost of a gallon of regular unleaded currently averages $2.48 according to the American Automobile Association. That is about 20 cents per gallon more than Virginians pay for the same thing.

Well, not quite the same thing.

Drivers in Virginia and almost every other state aren’t forced to let a government make-worker fondle their car, which is something many people would pay extra to avoid – in the manner of throwing a buck at the squeegee man to keep him from “washing” your car’s windshield while you wait for the light to change.

In Oregon – which also has a Pump Jockey Employment Mandate – a gallon of unleaded currently costs $2.97 or about 70 cents more than people pay to pump-it-themselves in states like Virginia and most other states, too.

Either way, the Pump Jockey Mandate adds significantly to the cost of gassing up – because someone’s got to pay for it. And you always pay more when you aren’t allowed to say no.

Taking the lowball figure of 20 cents extra per gallon, we arrive at about $3 extra per 15 gallon fill-up. Times four fill-ups monthly times 12 months equals $144 more each year – which is just shy of $1,500 over ten years… for a “service” most people have no interest in paying for.

No matter how many “jobs” it “creates.”

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MrLiberty
MrLiberty

I love the signs saying that nobody under the age of 16 can pump gas legally at a pump. When I was 10 I was mowing lawns in the neighborhood and riding my bike down to the station with the gas can in hand and pumping my own gas (dad showed me how the first time). I will say it once again for those that still haven’t figured it out….GOVERNMENT is the GREATEST EVIL EVER CREATED BY MAN!!!

Down in the holler
Down in the holler

Up until a couple of years ago NJ had the pump jockeys but also the lowest state gasoline taxes in the North East. Back then it was win-win for us to fill-up there traveling from Va. to family gatherings in N.E.. Now, not so much. (they made you pump your own diesel – at least where we stopped.

WestcoastDeplorable
WestcoastDeplorable

$3.30 at independents (cash except Circle K), $3.699 at Chevron. And people wonder why droves are leaving.

Glock-N-Load

I always thought this was a mafia holdover.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty

The only difference between the government and the mafia is their size…..oh, and the mafia can actually get things done.

Pequiste
Pequiste

I suspect the law shall be enacted with the provision that the “Petroleum, Oils, and Lubricants Manager” will be required to have attained at least a M.Sc. to get the gig. Affirmative Action S.T.E.M. candidates will get first crack at the outstanding career opportunity.

TLate
TLate

It is not about jobs Illinois is a taxation black hole. The state will get more money out of this bs law. They are trying to cover for the state pensions that are bankrupting the state. Why the people of Illinois do not say enough is enough is beyond me. I have friends and family there I go back to visit and shake my head at how they just take it year after year. Full disclosure I am in VA where the demos are trying to pull the same sort of bs with guns. At least we told them to f off!
How do you enforce a law when almost every county is a sanctuary for guns? What goes around comes around demo MFs! You can have sanctuary laws for IIs well we have them for the second amendment which we should not have to but demos…making laws that violate the constitution…. what can you do except use the same bs against them !

llpoh
llpoh

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Apple
Apple

Gas is 285.9 here. And its fucking freezing. There is no full service gas here. Any attendant out all day would get frostbite.

Ginger
Ginger

Submitted with no comment:

TC
TC

The first time I passed through NJ, I discovered that *all* the pumps were full service. OK. So I pulled up to a pump and waited. And waited. And waited. I could see the attendants hanging out in the station yukking it up. I remembered full service pumps at certain Exxon stations back from when I was a kid in the South. If you chose a full service pump, it was usually only seconds before someone was pumping gas, and if you wanted, checking your oil, your tire pressure and putting a shine on your windshield, and all that with a spring in their step. The attendants saw me waiting but kept yapping, so I figured this was some special kind of NJ full service pump where you do the work. I have zero point zero patience for bullshit, so I hopped out and started pumping my own gas. The instant the pump went on, the attendant came sprinting out of the building yelling and cussing the whole way. So if you’re ever in that situation, you know how to get them motivated.

Gupatii
Gupatii

In Oregon, if you are in a rural county (and that is most of Oregon), you can pump your own gas. Even if not in a rural county (you can tell by the purple hair loitering on the street corner) I’ve not had any trouble pumping my own gas..

Dutchman
Dutchman

What killed ‘gas station attendants’ was the oil shortage during the Carter administration. That’s when it became self service.

Here in Maple Grove, MN – it’s $2.10 a gallon at COSTCO, and you get a 4% discount (via the COSTCO credit card). It takes 2-3 minutes to fill-up. They have 16 pumps – 2 per island. It’s a breeze.

Contrast this to Minneapolis gas stations. Half the credit card pumps don’t work. There are 4 registers, but only one clerk. People buy scratch-offs, smokes, what ever. And the gas is $2.45.

Harrington Richardson
Harrington Richardson

I believe it was the push to make every station a convenience store which coincided with the end of the “service station.” Combine that with cars going from needing to be tuned up every 12,000 miles to almost never with the introduction of electronic ignition followed by fuel injection eliminating those old carburetor adjustments. Then it went from every 2,000 miles for oil changes to 6,000 and the market for service stations shrunk dramatically. In addition there is huge money for the oil companies in convenience stores. Shell supposedly makes $100,000 average per year on every c-store gas station in addition to the profit from fuel sales.

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