FRIDAY FAIL

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A Tripod and Automatic Timer Would Not Have Interrupted

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funny fail image Ironically, Elsa Has No Chill

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She never showed up…

A 41-Year-Old Dutchman named Alexander Pieter Cirk was sent to the hospital for exhaustion after wasting 10 days of his life at Changsha Huanghua International Airport in China. Everything was going smooth between Cirk and his 26-year-old girlfriend Zhang, until this happened.

Even though Cirk has sent pictures of his tickets, Zhang says she “thought it was a joke.”

Love does crazy things to people.

atomic bomb oven pizza they told me i could be a - 6104120064

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gifs sports pole vault whoops - 6685394688

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Jeopardy game show uproxx white people fail nation g rated - 8070547712

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See more at the Fail Blog

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522 Comments
nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:24 pm

comment image

Ricky Retardo
Ricky Retardo
  nkit
February 28, 2020 3:03 pm

Sheeeit.

TC
TC
  nkit
February 28, 2020 4:33 pm

Welcome to South Africa

ELF
ELF
  nkit
February 28, 2020 5:00 pm

Like rolling up the window is gonna help !

Gloriously Deplorable Paul
Gloriously Deplorable Paul
  nkit
February 29, 2020 1:51 am

Worked with a guy a few years older than me when I was in high school. Working part time maintaining trucks for a small trucking company. We’d go to lunch in the evening and he always drove (I rode a motorcycle to work).
This guy had a hair trigger temper and didn’t take shit from anyone.
One day we’re heading back to the shop after lunch and he gets into a verbal altercation with a Filipino looking guy driving a van. We’re going down Santa Fe Ave in Long beach and these two idiot drivers are jawing at each other when the Filipino holds up a bullet and shows it to my coworker.
Completely nonplussed my buddy reaches under the seat and pulls out a pistol, lays it on the window sill and yells “To use one of those you gotta have one of these, queerbait!”
Filipino dude left in a hurry.
I had no idea he carried and was a lot more cautious around him after that.

ELF
ELF
  Gloriously Deplorable Paul
February 29, 2020 5:40 am

Laughed hard at that !!! sounds kinda like something my old man would have done .

Mix
Mix
  nkit
February 29, 2020 11:56 am

Road rage 101;
Don’t argue with bazookas.

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:25 pm

comment image

Yancey Ward
Yancey Ward
  nkit
February 28, 2020 2:34 pm

Those shoes are inappropriate for walking along the pier.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
  Yancey Ward
February 28, 2020 8:42 pm

Depends on what you are trolling for.

ELF
ELF
  Yancey Ward
February 28, 2020 11:32 pm

” Oh no , you can’t do that ,
Once you start wearing those shoes ”
The Eagles .

Bob P
Bob P
  nkit
February 28, 2020 3:27 pm

All aboard my dinghy!

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:26 pm

comment image

Cow Doctor
Cow Doctor
  nkit
February 28, 2020 8:11 pm

One person mosh pit?

Yancey Ward
Yancey Ward
  nkit
February 28, 2020 8:18 pm

Aging Van Halen no longer had access to high quality groupies.

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:27 pm

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BL
BL
  nkit
February 28, 2020 5:07 pm

Spiderman ….. Spiderman……go Spidey.

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:27 pm

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Bob P
Bob P
  nkit
February 28, 2020 4:17 pm

Oprah’s lunch break.

just terrible
just terrible
  nkit
February 28, 2020 5:54 pm

I have never seen a black chick eat that many water melons, in one sitting.

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:27 pm

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Bob P
Bob P
  nkit
February 28, 2020 4:18 pm

As the Fed is learning it works till it doesn’t.

Jackk
Jackk
  nkit
February 29, 2020 11:12 pm

Pee Wee found the way back to stardom more difficult than expected.

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:28 pm

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Bob P
Bob P
  nkit
February 28, 2020 4:21 pm

No need for toilet paper with our new automatic wiping toilet!

just terrible
just terrible
  Bob P
February 28, 2020 5:56 pm

you can tell it is fake, cause the water would fall out if the toilet was cut in half. pfft.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
  just terrible
February 28, 2020 8:44 pm

You can see the water droplets on the glass front when the rat comes to the surface. Could be real.

ELF
ELF
  just terrible
February 28, 2020 11:33 pm

Plexiglass

cap'n fast
cap'n fast
  Bob P
February 29, 2020 1:43 am

no, the entire point of this exercise is to destroy all women’s self confidence in the premise that the infamous sewer snake does not exist. once they see the rat surface in the bowl, they will surely believe the sewer snake can also exist.

Mix
Mix
  nkit
February 29, 2020 12:06 pm

Proof you can never really truly flush Washington DC.

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:28 pm

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nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:29 pm

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Bob P
Bob P
  nkit
February 28, 2020 3:25 pm

That’s not all that’s making cream right now.

Cow Doctor
Cow Doctor
  nkit
February 28, 2020 8:12 pm

Berries and cream…it’s dessert

Anonymous
Anonymous
  nkit
February 28, 2020 11:33 pm

and a cherry on…bottom

Gloriously Deplorable Paul
Gloriously Deplorable Paul
  nkit
February 29, 2020 1:56 am

I’m just glad the no nipple rule is being observed. (snicker)

Mix
Mix
  nkit
February 29, 2020 12:10 pm

Dirty girls are the best, kinky girls come in a close second.

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:30 pm

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nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:30 pm

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nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:31 pm

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nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:31 pm

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ILuvCO2
ILuvCO2
  nkit
February 28, 2020 4:18 pm

What an asshole.

ELF
ELF
  ILuvCO2
February 28, 2020 5:04 pm

Democrats should not own guns !

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:32 pm

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nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:33 pm

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Bob P
Bob P
  nkit
February 28, 2020 4:22 pm

Yancey just took off his pants.

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:34 pm

comment image

Cow Doctor
Cow Doctor
  nkit
February 28, 2020 8:15 pm

TGIF nkit…you always make my week. ?

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:40 pm

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Anonymous
Anonymous
  nkit
February 28, 2020 5:30 pm

Say hello to my leeeetle fren

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:40 pm

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nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:41 pm

comment image

Bob P
Bob P
  nkit
February 28, 2020 4:23 pm

It’s a fixer upper.

BL
BL
  nkit
February 28, 2020 5:19 pm

Chinese new construction.

Gloriously Deplorable Paul
Gloriously Deplorable Paul
  BL
February 29, 2020 1:58 am

New Wuhan corona virus hospital.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
  nkit
February 28, 2020 8:46 pm

The house that FED built.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  nkit
February 29, 2020 2:11 am

Still, all it needs is a coat of Kilz.

nkit
nkit
  nkit
February 29, 2020 9:14 am

the question is : what happened to that guy in the second window from the left on the second floor?

Vixen Vic
Vixen Vic
  nkit
February 29, 2020 9:24 am

Looks like he’s a goner.

nkit
nkit
  Vixen Vic
February 29, 2020 12:33 pm

Well, Vic-Vic, there’s always hope. Not sure, but to me it looks like as the wall around that window falls forward the man appears to drop straight down. Perhaps if that didn’t maim him he had time to get up and run. It doesn’t seem like he was crushed, though. (Says the eternal optimist) I’m saying that he lived..NOBODY dies on FF!. :^)

Vixen Vic
Vixen Vic
  nkit
February 29, 2020 5:26 pm

OK, we’ll settle with maybe a broken leg and he lives.

Mix
Mix
  nkit
February 29, 2020 12:15 pm

Never regretted leaving Detroit.

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 2:42 pm

comment image

Unexpected
Unexpected
  nkit
February 28, 2020 4:34 pm

It appears they, literally, meant to do that.

Bob P
Bob P
  nkit
February 28, 2020 4:49 pm

You’re supposed to drive forward, not sideways, dummies!

ELF
ELF
  nkit
February 28, 2020 5:07 pm

Too many Illegal Aliens , not enough seatbelts .

just terrible
just terrible
  nkit
February 28, 2020 6:01 pm

another fake, no engineer would shave his head to do a stunt like this, let alone 4, nor would they all where the same colored shirts and pants. total fake news.

nkit
nkit
  just terrible
February 28, 2020 7:18 pm

ELF
ELF
  just terrible
February 28, 2020 7:49 pm

Dude ! You are my Hero today !!

Yancey Ward
Yancey Ward
  nkit
February 28, 2020 8:24 pm

I was lucky to survive this. I should have known something was wrong when I noticed I wasn’t the only dummie in the vehicle.

ELF
ELF
  Yancey Ward
February 28, 2020 11:35 pm

Was Bob P with you ? ( sorry Bob ) LOL !

Vixen Vic
Vixen Vic
  nkit
February 29, 2020 6:17 am

They all look like dummies. If that a bulldozer pushing the vehicle over?

Vixen Vic
Vixen Vic
  nkit
February 29, 2020 6:18 am

The dummy landing closest to the camera lost a part of its leg.

Hardscrabble Farmer
Hardscrabble Farmer
  nkit
February 29, 2020 9:44 am

That’s just how they roll.

Mix
Mix
  nkit
February 29, 2020 12:23 pm

I never thought watching libiots leaving the demoncratic party could be so much fun.

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 3:26 pm

comment image

ELF
ELF
  nkit
February 28, 2020 5:08 pm

Good work Dad ! ( building your kid a rollercoaster )

Vixen Vic
Vixen Vic
  nkit
February 29, 2020 6:19 am

I would have loved that as a kid.

nkit
nkit
  nkit
February 29, 2020 12:35 pm

I nominate that man for Dad of the Year!

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 3:27 pm

comment image

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 3:28 pm

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Ricky Retardo
Ricky Retardo
  nkit
February 28, 2020 3:41 pm

He dead.

Unexpected
Unexpected
  Ricky Retardo
February 28, 2020 4:35 pm

And now the bike is flooded.

ELF
ELF
  Unexpected
February 28, 2020 5:09 pm

DAMN ! I hate when that happens !

Mix
Mix
  nkit
February 29, 2020 12:29 pm

Darwin Award #4271

nkit
nkit
February 28, 2020 4:52 pm

comment image

BL
BL
  nkit
February 28, 2020 5:10 pm

All in a day’s work, shot his monkey ass.

Mix
Mix
  BL
February 29, 2020 12:34 pm

but now he’s a demoncrat forever.

just terrible
just terrible
  nkit
February 28, 2020 6:05 pm

did you see how he rolled away to avoid getting hit, that was epic.
the guard murdered him with the last shot, he was leaving there was no need to fire that last bullet, I mean, what was he thinking? just terrible.

YourAverageJoe
YourAverageJoe
  just terrible
February 28, 2020 6:36 pm

I’d say he was defending himself like any average joe would.

mark
mark
  YourAverageJoe
February 28, 2020 7:58 pm

Average Joe, my friend…

There is nothing average about what that white haired old guard did…and there is nothing average about decisive life and death action.

When it is time to act…there are acts that have no time to wait.

He who hesitates can not only be lost…he can be dead.

Being an ‘Average Joe’ in the lost Republic today is like ‘Common Sense’…it once was everywhere, but now it is a rare and a valuable condition.

Donkey
Donkey
  mark
February 29, 2020 4:31 am

I’ve never been in a firefight (thank the Lord) so, I’ll have to agree with those who have.

mark
mark
  just terrible
February 28, 2020 7:14 pm

Pthhhtttt…Come on ‘just terrible’…you have never, ever been in an adrenalin fueled gun fight…or any serious death threat split second reflex live or die situation…or seen a seemingly dead man kill in a last gasp…go back to your TV…and safe, smug ‘know nothing’ judgement.

“The guard murdered him”…you are the worst kind of puffed up moralist…the false self-prideful lecturer who would fold like a cardboard box in the monsoon if ever faced with a split second real life or death move.

But, don’t you feel so ‘superior’ watching the safe video…and letting everyone know…you could never ‘do that’.

ELF
ELF
  mark
February 28, 2020 7:53 pm

Well Said Mark . VERY WELL SAID !!

troy
troy
  mark
February 29, 2020 12:20 pm

Can’t shoot a person in the back fleeing from the building. Fact

mark
mark
  troy
February 29, 2020 7:11 pm

Yes you can, didn’t you watch the video troy?

ELF
ELF
  troy
February 29, 2020 11:36 pm

Yes you can ! See my answer below .

Anonymous
Anonymous
  troy
March 4, 2020 4:28 am

Good thing I was not there. I would have went outside and pumped in a few more shots. It’s the only way to be sure.

Jimmy
Jimmy
  troy
March 21, 2020 1:25 pm

Only in libtard run shit holes.

ELF
ELF
  mark
March 1, 2020 1:54 pm

To the two FuckTards who downvoted Marks comment .
You two aren’t even worthy to lick his shoes !

Yancey Ward
Yancey Ward
  just terrible
February 28, 2020 8:28 pm

What was he thinking? He might have been thinking this idiot won’t be robbing no more banks.

Pequiste
Pequiste
  just terrible
February 28, 2020 9:03 pm

jt,

P.S.A: Round here you may need to use the “//SARC OFF// disclaimer on occasion.

My take on this gunfight- a real happy ending.

ELF
ELF
  Pequiste
February 28, 2020 11:39 pm

I couldn’t agree more !
I love a happy ending .

ELF
ELF
  just terrible
February 28, 2020 11:37 pm

I’m gonna hope you’re being sarcastic here .
Because if you’re not , you are WAY outta line !

Anonymous
Anonymous
  just terrible
February 29, 2020 2:28 am

He shot him in the back like a coward as the guy was running away. Charge him with murder and let jury decide before the civil suits strip him of everything.

ELF
ELF
  Anonymous
February 29, 2020 5:49 am

Anonymous , you are a BLIVIT !
That’s 10Lbs of SHIT , in a 5Lb bag .

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Anonymous
February 29, 2020 8:47 am

That guard should have let him live so he could come back and try again. Not! He came in looking for trouble now his troubles are alllll over.

mark
mark
  Anonymous
February 29, 2020 12:23 pm

Did you ever think that – if not stopped for good that wounded bank robber would have abducted the first person he saw and who knows how that would have gone for the innocent person abducted? Or the wounded robber would have gotten into another shoot out and killed an innocent CC citizen defending his or her family? Or he could have killed a LEO responding???

The only way your comment would have had the best ending possible is if was YOU who would have been the innocent person abducted or shot…then your high and mighty attitude would be flipped over on your idiot frigg’in head.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Anonymous
March 4, 2020 4:34 am

F//k you chic//n shyt SOB. You know less than nothing.

Jimmy
Jimmy
  Anonymous
March 21, 2020 1:27 pm

Guy comes in to rob bank, starts shooting……American rules – Save the taxpayers money and dump his ass however it gets done. No do overs….pussy

troy
troy
  just terrible
February 29, 2020 12:19 pm

Yeah, the last shot would land the guard in jail and i see by the down votes that there are 28 clueless people that dont know you can’t legally shoot someone in the back that is running away from the conflict

mark
mark
  troy
February 29, 2020 7:50 pm

troy boy,

Hmmm…Possibly judged by 12 or possibly carried by 6???

Decisions…decisions…decisions…

Let him get away because of some sick bird? An ill eagle??? And risk some innocent (or more than one innocent) possibly then carried by six at his lunatic hands….and the guard has just been shot at, gallons of adrenalin are pumping, and he has .00001 of a second to weigh the decision.

Hmmm…

Yep…bring on the 12.

End Game Shot.

Annnnnnd he’s gone….

Sorry troy boy you are a legalist…lawyer…future carried by six victim?

All three?

(Good thing it wasn’t me or Flea on duty…we spit shine our dum-dums)

ELF
ELF
  mark
March 1, 2020 1:51 pm

Spit shine . I haven’t thought of that term in years . LOL !

mark
mark
  ELF
March 1, 2020 11:12 pm

ELF,

I like my dum-dums bright and shiny!

ELF
ELF
  troy
February 29, 2020 11:11 pm

Ummm, Sorry Troy Boy , but it’s YOU who are totally WRONG .
1st , guy’s robbing a bank , FELONY . While armed – 2nd FELONY .
2nd , guy shoots at guard while committing FELONY , 3rd FELONY .
3rd , guy trys fleeing ,4th FELONY .
The law says that ANYONE , LEO or citizen may stop a DANGEROUS FLEEING FELON .
The idea being that it prevents said FELON from harming other INNOCENT people .
And you may use whatever means necessary to STOP said FLEEING FELON .
So you are shooting to STOP , not to kill . But if said DANGEROUS FELON
dies while being LEGALLY stopped , that’s just the price he paid
for being a DANGEROUS FLEEING FELON .

NOW , if you doubt what I have just said . Show that video to ANY LEO ,
and see what they have to say about it .
And , LEOs do just the same – ALL THE TIME !
AND , there isn’t a District Attorney ANYWHERE who would even
think about filing charges against that guard .
They would probably give him a medal .

So it’s back to law school for you , Troy Boy .

Jimmy
Jimmy
  troy
March 21, 2020 1:28 pm

Again only in lefty run shit holes.

Hardscrabble Farmer
Hardscrabble Farmer
  nkit
February 29, 2020 9:43 am

This is why you always have a round chambered. Had he simply had a magazine in and had to chamber the first round he would have lost the initiative. He was already a little slow to react to the teller (that kid knew what to do) and he lost his footing twice; the first time when he reached for his weapon (his feet were crossed and he was leaning on the counter) and then as he reacted to the perps first shot- he instinctively retreated and almost fell on his ass. But once he understood the threat and recovered his bearing he turned into a regular hero. Those counters aren’t made of steel, they only offered concealment and he pressed the fight forward. Those guns weren’t more than two feet apart and both pointed at each other.

I don’t care what anyone says, for an old timer he did and solid job of defending himself and the other people in that bank at great risk to his own safety. And that last shot was defensive. The perp was still armed and could have easily used the vestibule as cover.

Great illustration for always being on your guard, especially when that’s your job.

Mix
Mix
  nkit
February 29, 2020 12:32 pm

Where’s a road rage bazooka when you need it.

ELF
ELF
  Mix
February 29, 2020 11:13 pm

My thoughts exactly !

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