ALBANY, NY—Governor Cuomo announced today that he has secured a multi-million dollar deal to write a second book called How to Respect Women.
“We are thrilled to have one of the foremost experts peel back the mysteries of how women should be treated,” said Alan Rickles, president of Penguin Random House. “This is a case of having the right man for the right moment. In a culture that glorifies machismo, boiling in a stew of toxic masculinity, we need the voice of a hero like Andrew Cuomo to challenge men to rise to greatness. I think women everywhere are going to be touched, really and truly touched, by Mr. Cuomo”.
While some aides worried that Governor Cuomo overextended himself by agreeing to another book, those aides have been fired and silenced with non-disclosure agreements. Mr. Cuomo did admit, repeatedly, that his hands were already full, but remained absolutely adamant that he could aggressively press himself onto even more engagements if he had to.
Mr. Cuomo has promised to reveal his tried and true tactics to honor women in such an incredible way that they can’t even bring themselves to speak about it—unless forced to under oath. While a few details will have to be left out for legal reasons, Mr. Cuomo will also describe how he and his brother worked together as wingmen to help create an environment of respect that women simply could not resist.
President Biden reportedly will write the foreword, where sources say he will urge Governor Cuomo to resign so as to ‘leave some for the rest of us’.
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So there are 20 million people in NY. Half are women. So this loser can’t find one who is willing to haul his ashes??? I know he’s uglier than a pail of snot but not 1 in 10,000,000? And I thought Fredo was the dumb one.
Nicely done but it’s sad when such biting satire is separated from reality by the thinnest of margins.
The Forward written by Bill Clinton
Foreword.
Nazi!!!
jooo luver! ;0
Cuomo’s mass murder of people in nursing homes might be just a little more important….But like all gammas, Cuomo has little attraction for women…
Cuomo’s “murder” of people in nursing homes might not be murder, as that would require proofing in court that they died OF Covid and not merely “with” Covid. Cuomo would mount an aggressive defense if prosecuted, and likely has proof that they DID NOT die OF Covid.
Perhaps the reason why the sexual misconduct charges exist in the first place. The danger that him defending himself in a “murder” case would blow the lid of the fake ‘case’demic. TPTB can’t have that so Cuomo’s now a liability.
How’s that for conspiracy theory?
The people who plan on holding the marionette strings on President Harris don’t want this clod Cuomo thinking he should run against her in 2024. They’re just taking him out preemptively. As a Sicilian, he knows this. I hope he keeps his job. People knew what they were voting for. Fuck ’em.
Gerald Celente showed Cuomo wearing a golf shirt and you could see the outline of nipple rings. In one of the allegations, he asked a lady what she thought enhanced the pleasure in sex. His answer: pain. This is one sick bastard.
The Cuomo nipple-ring thing has been completely obvious for a while.
He makes no effort to…. to keep his hobbies to himself, as it were.
If I were in charge of running Hell I’d make sure that the Guv spends eternity digging graves for all the old people he murdered.
Three Times Not The Lady
BREAKING NEWS
Laurel Hubbard exits the Olympic competition early after failing on all three attempts to maintain a snatch.
Maybe Next Time Laurel!
Maybe next time…
One needs to have a snatch to “maintain a snatch.”
The fuktard Laurel Hubbard should get a nice shiny participation medal for having the balls to try and pass this psychosis off as legitimate sport.
(No question in Auntie’s mind: it is time, once again, to retire the Olympics for at least two millennia.)
Like the Dinosaurs… the Olympics had their time.
Later that evening, alone in his/her/its bedroom, he/she/it did 31 consecutive clean power jerks.
Jealous?
I can’t believe that book hasn’t already won an Oscar.
His Recommendations: # 1, 7, 12, and45, leave no marks. ;0
This fucker is so filled with DJT derangement syndrome that he didn’t take a clue from Trump that if you throw enough money at her you can do whatever you want.