‘Never Has America Faced A Greater Threat Than Donald Trump,’ Says Guy Who Started Two Wars And Shot A Dude In The Face

Via The Babylon Bee

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WILSON, WY — Former Vice President Dick Cheney, who famously started two wars in the Middle East and shot a dude in the face while hunting, now says Donald Trump is the greatest threat America has ever faced.

“Donald Trump is an evil reprobate and a big meanie, and a danger to our Constitutional rights,” growled the retired politician who orchestrated the brutal torture of hundreds of detainees who were held without trial. “We must make sure he never gets elected to office again. And also, vote for my daughter, Liz.”

Political consultants applauded Liz Cheney for her brilliant move of tapping one of the most hated politicians in history to help boost her political chances. Initial polling indicates her approval has climbed .0000002 percentage points since Dick Cheney’s statement.

“If there’s a singular figure universally adored by every hard-working American, it’s Dick Cheney,” said a spokesperson for the campaign. “We are grateful for his endorsement, and look forward to seeing her represent the citizens of Wyoming.”

Trump was quick to respond to Cheney’s statement, saying “Poor little Dick Cheney! He’s so mad that I got elected president instead of him. Boo hoo! Maybe he should stop shooting dudes in the face! Sorry, Dick!”

At publishing time, Liz Cheney’s approval dipped again after her Dad accidentally shot another dude in the face.

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13 Comments
MrLiberty
MrLiberty
August 6, 2022 2:47 pm

I can’t even think of a punishment severe enough to cover what this genocidal war criminal has done to America and the world. That he currently exists without a human heart says so much.

another Doug
another Doug
August 6, 2022 2:49 pm

Says the LAST man I would listen to regarding anything.

Iggy
Iggy
August 6, 2022 3:00 pm

Can’t believe this evil.cocksucker is still alive. Didn’t he have his first heart attack over 40 years ago ? It’s true the good die young but this evil fuck Gordon forever.

Anonymous
Anonymous
August 6, 2022 3:56 pm

I thought Cheney was dead. Something to look forward to, I guess.

Ginger
Ginger
  Anonymous
August 6, 2022 5:13 pm

‘I thought Cheney was dead. ‘
No, he just smells that way.

Colorado Artist
Colorado Artist
  Anonymous
August 7, 2022 12:41 am

Satan can always wait for his due. Dick is going straight down no matter what.

John
John
August 6, 2022 4:03 pm

Big swingin’ Dick is a lifetime member and former director of the globalist Council on Foreign Relations (CFR), which is once again running the show. CFR members on the “Biden team” include the secretaries of State, Treasury, Defense, Commerce and Homeland Security. Also the CIA director, Fed chairman, UN ambassador and dozens more.

Aunt Acid
Aunt Acid
August 6, 2022 6:45 pm

And this is sarcasm? How?

TampaRed
TampaRed
August 6, 2022 6:53 pm

look who else is trying to help her,mr i like to hunt & i play tough gun toting guys in the movis but we need gun regulations,mr kevin costner–

Liz Cheney Turns to Famous ‘Gun Control’ Supporter to Help Her Stay in Power

Colorado Artist
Colorado Artist
August 7, 2022 12:39 am

If you want to know the character of this demon,
don’t look at the piles of dead American soldiers he built,
over his lifetime of duplicity and venality,
just look at the daughter he raised. Another minion of Satan.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Colorado Artist
August 7, 2022 5:33 am
Jdog
Jdog
August 7, 2022 12:52 pm

Cheney deserves his place in history right beside Stalin, and Mao, as one of the biggest mass murderers in history.

ottomatik
ottomatik
August 7, 2022 2:12 pm

Now there is sumpin i never thought I’d see…
Dick Chenny champion of the left.