Elon Musk Vows To Reveal Government And Media Collusion Once He Figures Out Where These Red Dots Are Coming From

Via The Babylon Bee

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AUSTIN, TX — The world waited eagerly for further information on the Hunter Biden laptop story suppression from Twitter owner Elon Musk, who had vowed to reveal the details of potential government collusion with the media as soon as he can figure out why he keeps seeing little red dots hovering around on his body.

“I have every intention of being as transparent and straightforward in this matter as possible,” Musk said on a Zoom call interview as a trio of red dots swirled around on his forehead. “All will be known very shortly. I just have to determine why I’m suddenly covered in these little, red laser dots.”

Witnesses close to Musk said the dots first began to appear shortly after he tweeted his intention to provide details about Twitter suppressing the Hunter Biden laptop scandal in the fall of 2020, shortly before the presidential election. “Within minutes of writing that tweet, we noticed the little dots appearing on the walls of every room Elon was in,” said Adrian Haj, a member of Musk’s inner circle. “We didn’t think anything of it at first, but now they’re everywhere. Weird!”

Musk seemed undeterred. “I understand that there are very powerful forces in this world who very much do not want this information made public. But I bought Twitter to stir the pot, and this really is quite fun.”

At publishing time, the news was still pending and only a few members of Musk’s entourage had fallen victim to apparent sniper fire.

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21 Comments
Iska Waran
Iska Waran
December 3, 2022 7:24 pm

Not about Musk, but… (from Barnhart.biz)
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boron
boron
  Iska Waran
December 3, 2022 8:28 pm

Y’ mean like Elon Musk, Bernard Arnault, Gautam Adani, Jeff Bezos, Bill Gates, Warren Buffett, Mukesh Ambani. Keep stirring up the anti-Semites; we’re watching you, Muhammed.

Iska Waran
Iska Waran
  boron
December 4, 2022 12:00 am

LOL. Who’s “we”? The 3 letter guys? For the record, not all the bad guys are Jews, and not all Jews are bad guys. Most are decent, I’m sure. Feel better now? Most black folks aren’t criminals, either. Doesn’t mean I want to buy a house on MLK Blvd. It’s not my goddamn fault if 80% of the time I see someone advocating open borders, replacing current Americans with new “better” ones or some globalist project the fucker’s usually named “Jonathan”.

eraser
eraser
  Iska Waran
December 4, 2022 5:22 am

Right on!

overthecliff
overthecliff
December 3, 2022 7:34 pm

Musk did not become arguably the most wealthy man in the world because he was a loose cannon. He is on a mission and is not our friend.

BabbleOn
BabbleOn
  overthecliff
December 4, 2022 10:17 am

I agree. I also disagree. His wealth is his payoff just like anyone else who gets up and goes to work. He is just doing his job. Is he any different than the Dr. vaccinating(killing) people for $220 an hour? People need to be raptured at some point don’t they. So even if the Dr. is killing people, aren’t these people thus “raptured”? Is the Dr. actually performing “Gods” work? Then is Elon paid too, for preforming “Gods” work? All compensation for doing Gods work is equal. Just some do more important work for God than others. Why do People care how much monopoly money the next guy has or how he got it? Envy is Evil. Don’t like your lot? You wanna get paid? Find some “Gods” work to do.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
December 3, 2022 7:38 pm

People laugh, but our government is pure evil.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  MrLiberty
December 4, 2022 4:00 am

You could leave out “our” for greater accuracy.

Anonymous
Anonymous
December 3, 2022 9:02 pm

Elon Musk is Bruno Tattaglia. He is Bruno Tattaglia invading the territory of the Corleone’s without the backing of Don Barzini.

Those factions in govt which enable Musk’s existence are the “Barzini Family”.
The “Corleone Family” is those aspects of the intelligence complex that own and operate the Psy op known as “Twitter”.
Or, was Musk so dense that he didn’t realize that Twitter was a CIA shop? (or FBI, or NSA, or ….)

I give you, Elon Musk:

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Anonymous
Anonymous
  Anonymous
December 4, 2022 11:29 am

That’s Phillip T (the father), not Bruno (the son)

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Anonymous
December 19, 2022 6:19 pm

Thank you for the correction.

Hadley
Hadley
December 3, 2022 9:46 pm

One thing I can say about all three South Africans I have either known, interacted with, or observed: they all are pretty bright chaps, are rather unconventional, and are more than willing to stand up for what they believe. In case you forgot, Elon was born in Pretoria.

Iggy
Iggy
December 3, 2022 10:23 pm

Man I could go for some Sauer braten.

Iska Waran
Iska Waran
  Iggy
December 4, 2022 12:08 am

Genau

James
James
December 3, 2022 10:41 pm

I am enjoying the new:

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Feed the fire!

Leah
Leah
December 3, 2022 11:55 pm

Your mom is doing better? Hope so.

Iska Waran
Iska Waran
December 4, 2022 12:13 am

Your mom? Reminds me of this classic. “Letzte Versuch. Ohne Heil Hitler. Nur Prost”

Anonymous
Anonymous
December 4, 2022 3:08 am

The wireless Neuralink™ communications uploads have a glitch, apparently. The Red Dots are similar to tracer rounds.

Even Neo had to be hardwired for upgrades.

Better get it fixed soon, aj may appear before groundhog day. And that orange dude, IF he can get out of the non-compete clause. he made with himself.