KANSAS CITY, MO — A local mother expressed relief and finally sat down to rest from her marathon session of doomsday preparation, confident that her family was now ready to endure the upcoming outbreak of World War III because her tomato plant had sprouted.
“I wasn’t entirely sure we were ready for the new War to End All Wars,” said Lacy Smith. “But now that the tomato plant has officially sprouted, it’s pretty safe to say we’ve got things covered. We are now a self-sustaining family and can face the coming nuclear holocaust with the knowledge that we won’t starve! I love homesteading!”
Families across the country have begun taking the necessary steps to prepare for everything from food and gasoline shortages to attacks on the energy grid and open war in the streets. Dedicated homesteaders are supremely confident that their skills in gardening, fire-building, rainwater collection, and sourdough bread baking will allow them to withstand the horrible scourge on humanity the next World War is sure to bring about.
“There’s a lot of uncertainty in the world these days,” Lacy said with a calm and resolute tone. “Thankfully, we’ve spent years preparing for what’s coming. We now have enough tomatoes, sourdough starter, and egg-laying chickens to get us through. To think where we’d be if I hadn’t bought those cute little gardening gloves at Aldi and started gardening all those years ago!”
At publishing time, Lacy was researching methods for trapping and preparing wild urban squirrels as an additional food source for her family and making sure her strategic essential oil reserve was fully stocked to treat any potential physical ailments caused by nuclear fallout and radiation poisoning.
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Feelz count as nutrition and safety.
Don’t forget to stock up!
*Squirrel stew is a fine meal.
*(pressure cooker recommended)
Ironic that the E-p-s-t-e-i-n Psyop came out right before the news went public confirming the greatest public child molesting campaign in the history of the world.
100,000 white male children molested by homo. EVERY day the news stated how important it was to have homo in boyscouts.
But americans would rather obsess about dating service with youger women for elites. 2 jewish people taken down and a smiling 17 year old with her family getting a huge payoff.
Sick country
https://www.ranker.com/list/stephen-king-car-accident/erin-mccann
Good for Lacy!
Tis baby steps but once the prepper bug bites folks get better and better in goals towards becoming at least a little more able to sustain themselves,would be nice to see more Lacy’s getting started and growing skills/food/preps ect.
Someone needs to introduce the Lacy’s to firearms and get them proficient with their use,so…..,be a patriot and help out a Lacy!
On a side note,prepper duck has a interest in getting to know Lacy better!
Lacy has all she needs. Brawndo! Plants crave Brawndo. Brawndo has Electrolytes.
Mom Confident Family Has What It Needs To Survive WWIII Now That The Tomato Plant Has Sprouted
….as long as KANSAS CITY, MO is not in the blast or radiation zones!
Were that a marijuana plant, she could have staved off depression for a couple of months…perhaps enhance her creative thought process in the bargain. Maybe even eat it. Plant wisely.
Seems this one went over people’s heads.