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It is my sincere desire to provide readers of this site with the best unbiased information available, and a forum where it can be discussed openly, as our Founders intended. But it is not easy nor inexpensive to do so, especially when those who wish to prevent us from making the truth known, attack us without mercy on all fronts on a daily basis. So each time you visit the site, I would ask that you consider the value that you receive and have received from The Burning Platform and the community of which you are a vital part. I can't do it all alone, and I need your help and support to keep it alive. Please consider contributing an amount commensurate to the value that you receive from this site and community, or even by becoming a sustaining supporter through periodic contributions. [Burning Platform LLC - PO Box 1520 Kulpsville, PA 19443] or Paypal
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Finally, it’s Friday Fail which heralds the start of the weekend…
. . . especially if you live in Europe or “work from home” on the American Continents, that is.
Inspired by this man, I told a bully at the pub, “Yes, you’re 6’5″ with muscles of steel, but I can kill you with my Snicker’s bar, pussy.” I should be out of the hospital by mid-month.
Yeah, lot’s of peeps miss or ignore that one little word.
“… almost always…”
If you had ‘dirted’ your hands with a bud the outcome may have been different, or not.
Which month?
FTW …
Well now who will try and diddle the kids?
No, you.
The future of that relationship will depend entirely upon how long Dad stay’s on the other side of that door.
1 minute = ass whuppin deluxe
10 minutes = raise in allowance and a hearty slap on the back.
And yet it might be totally innocent. He might’ve told the women, “Worry not, ladies, I identify as a woman, and I just need to take a huge shit.” I’m sure the women would iunderstand.
I have no idea about any of this. Holy shit, I guess I am retarded.
I only recognize Elendil.
That it is hard shows how bad this is…
Tolkien characters:
Celebrian
Cirdan
Elendil
Finarfin
Haldir
Close: Bergil (Beren), Elronin (Elrond).
Missing psychoactive drug names: Melkor, Morgoth, and Ungoliant
What’s a “Tolkien”?
He doesn’t have a 38 lodged. Fixes lots of problems
We call this pizza the WEF Special.
One star is way too generous.
Limited government as defined in The Constitution. Which really should have included term limits for these grifting career politicians.
They made way too many assumptions about who would want the power.
if they’re not a crook going in they will convert in quick order! everything is about money/power and they will have both before leaving. the first thing after election they attend a course given by their elder statesmen on how/where/when to obtain from lobbyists and elites and mostly how to stay quiet.
If they don’t convert, most have some embarrassing emails/texts/phone calls or even private jet flights to a well known island. All recorded by the NSA and stored per the “Patriot”Act to be used when needed.
Seems to me our founding fathers placed too much trust and/or faith in the voters.
Seems to me they only envisioned voters as being White Male Landowners…..
Not necessarily White, but yes – landowners (or at least those wealthy enough to have a significant amount of skin in the game).
The 17th Amendment was a huge mistake.
Germany is in a league of its own when it comes to shooting itself in the foot. . . and letting others shoot its other foot: “You vant to explode ze piepline and destroy ze German economy, Joe? Sure, go right ahead.”
That is a fact. They are shutting down all their nuclear reactors with no good way to replace that power. France has about 70% of their power generated with nuclear power. They have been doing it for decades with no serious accidents. Germany decided to shut them down after Fukushima, that disaster was completely avoidable if the plant had been engineered correctly.
Not really.
The main cause of the accident was that the design base did not extend to an unprecedented 9.0+ earthquake in a location that would both generate a huge tsunami and lower the protective wall enough to allow it to pass over it. (The wall’s original height would have been enough to block the tsunami.)
You can’t design to cover every possible event, only those with a reasonable probability (even a really small chance) of occurring. Otherwise you would be designing to survive such things as a nuclear strike or a meteor hitting it right in the reactor. They do design for a 747 hitting the reactor building (2ndary containment) and a steam explosion of the entire water inventory in the reactor inside the primary containment. Those are the US criteria – the Japanese criteria may be even higher, since they are understandably a bit paranoid on the subject.
The generators for emergency power were below sea level. A really REALLY bad deisgn.
We ALL KNOW who has ALWAYS been shooting them in the foot. A certain short unappreciated artist knew.
Not sure that’s a correct reading of the Nordstream destruction by the US …
Recall 2014 when Victoria Nuland had our CIA and others overthrow a legitimately elected government in Ukraine because Ukraine wanted to start importing oil/gas from Russia …
Fast forward to 2022 when Germany, after all of the nonsensical sanctions against Russia by order of the US (and the same Nuland plus Blinken), also tried to start importing oil/gas directly from Russia via the Nordstream pipeline … and, next thing we all knew, the US sabotaged that project … hoping to teach Germany a lesson about who’s got the bigger balls …
…a lesson about who holds the leash.
Mornin’ SOH; BP. Get the party started.
One of these things is not like the others! lol.
at my age, salt is a big concern.
For today’s loony world: Play with her boobs not her balls.
LOL.
If he has boobs and balls, don’t play with it at all.
Yeah. Play time is pretty much over at that point. It’s all eye bleach and Ajax from there.
A swissarmy knife may some what help, but after that, no boob play
Always keep the crabs and galvanized washers on separate plates.
Don’t worry, sheople, you can still get the bivalent shots (original and omicron BA.4/BA.5 strains) if you want to feel even less okay, and be optimistic that one day the shot will kill you so you won’t feel sick ever again.
That depends on where you end up.
Failure?!
I would personally say time well spent!
Groot got’s da Gout!
…for when YAJ checks in…
I’ll allow it
Waiting for your approval, Joe.
Karen ain’t got nothing on a pissed off cat
This one is so bizarre I just had to include it…
Word of advice guys: Never try to pick up a gal with, “Hey, darling, let’s get out of this dump so your vagina can take a screenshot of me,” unless you like to get kneed in the sack.
“I want to put a baby in you!” doesn’t always work either.
“I want to glaze your tonsils” flies like a lead balloon too.
and, “would you like to lick my sack”?
“Hey, baby! You want to blow this joint? Or…we could leave instead”
My favorite pickup line from Jethro Bodine,
“Boy, you sure don’t sweat much for a fat girl!”
Awesome.
I’m gonna use that.
every time I do that they also piss all over my hand. is that good or bad?
Whatever floats your boat …
So what? Who gives a shit what WHO thinks? If you do, I need a new doc.
the Who has a lead singer who likes to play with little girls?
Best smoked brisket is Whole Hog in Little Rock.
nkit swears by it. “I took Intellifuck this morning and fucked a rhino fast while acing my calculus final, with no sign of bone rot whatsoever! Every other time I did this I shit myself, but not with Intellifuck. It’s a godamn miracle drug!”
LOL again. Reminds me of George Costanza trying to hit his trifecta of simultaneously 1) boning, 2) watching TV and 3) eating a pastrami sandwich.
I do, BobP, my fuck speed increased 10X, though my fuck time dropped. At least my boner didn’t rot, and I didn’t shit the bed..
Hey fren. Let’s not bring up the subject of how efficient we are with our abilities, or lack thereof, to clutch our mud.
It’s a subject matter for another time.
Perhaps after tumblers filled with ice and Woodford reserve, with a Coors light backup.
On a backyard patio.
In a tropical like environment.
Sworn to secrecy.
“Well, Depends…”
word is all of our brainwashed scientists have been overdosing on this stuff since the new Webb telescope has proven the “big bang” to be total Bullshit!
Calm down, dear. Here, let me press on your clitoris and G-spot. You’ll feel much better.
yeah, because that always calms shit right down. You’ve taken a few shot to the head in life, haven’t ya?
TCS
:o)
According to memes, we can’t find the clit much less the g spot
Sure hope Bill Gates likes hot coffee.
Two young brothers, in a stunning example of our nation’s divide,
where the younger, emotional one reflects the ways and means of the woke.
That pretty much nails the difference.
A good big brother would next slap little bro up the side of his head. Set him straight before it’s too late.
Husband: So long. I hope you and your 10 cats will be very happy.
Can you imagine the smell with just four???
not if they’re trained to go outside?
Just keep em outside
I take the neighbours cat coyote shooting, someday he’ll realize who is the bait
We had 4 at a time … smell was not an issue if you actually, you know, empty their litter box every day …
Sounds like heaven
Had a friend with 7 indoor cats in a small house. Her husband put the boxes in an accessible location under the eaves and installed an exhaust fan nearby. Worked great.
no problem. all he has to do is reach inside and pull the damn thing out?
I realize we’re early in the thread, but don’t get squirrely and go nuts w/ DV’s, mmk?
From Poland, Ms. Marta Kowalczyk, courtesy of The Hostages.
Dubja, dubja.
.
Looks like my dog……but not my wife.
hey, I’m Polish. I’ll gladly shoot that squirrel!
Trans Richard greerer wet dream
I think Cow Doc came back as a squirrel.
Lucky squirrel.
Maybe he’s a tranny detector and is just going for the nuts.
Maybe he just likes going to the place where you first met. It’s very romantic of him.
They are not women.
From what I hear, all real women have nuts. The rest are just posers
All I see are signs of a matriarchal cuntocracy.
More men die from prostate cancer than do women from breast cancer.
I know what you do. I’m dying, and I want two chicks at the same time before I go, dammit! You and you sister will do just fine.
But you need more cream in the middle.
Try our improved double stuffed. Twist and lick. Dunk it in milk. We don’t give a shit.
Yes…yes I would…
My kind of girl!!
well okay, stop real fast and you’ll get rear-ended!
Sure w/ the vw you take anal frequently
“I wonder why my girlfriend likes anal so much?”
“Did you check for a vagina?”
Ya beat me to it, James.
Credit where credit’s due.
Also a good summation of US foreign policy.
Need the drugs and oil, why else would we attack? Also the kids ‘ cause reasons
On the No Left Turn with traffic obviously going in that direction ahead; I’ve encountered that before. All you can basically do is turn right, go down and turn around somewhere and get back into traffic, or just break the fuckin law. But if you choose the former, do the stupid maneuver, go where you gotta go, then go home and get hammered. Not Paul Pelosi style.
And why should we listen to Caitlyn Jenner’s testicles?
if nothing else, to remember they banged against each other during a decathalon many, many years ago. Survived, but are most likely shriveled up raisins at this point with a disheartening loss of testosterone.
Now. The commenter going by that tag line?
The platform thrives on various degrees of wit and vulgarity.
It speaks volumes of the hypocrisy and irony of the woke.
Let’s allow it.
Cue up the meme where an old photo has Howard Cosell on the sidelines of MNF, flanked by O.J. and Bruce…
“I’m Howahd CoSELL, and have just had a glimpse into the future.
Yore not going to believe the shit I’m about to reveal.”
“Down Goes Frazshuh! Down Goes Frazshuh!”
okay.
Sure hope Fauci hates the accordion.
hat tip, TFI.
Yeah, but doesn’t it warm your heart to know we’ll all die together as one?
But our drag show will be fabulous! Also china Russia Iran and n Korea willi kick our ass
…just…wow! Good thing the buried wasn’t out there alone.
Black dude in same situation. “Oh, free snowboard! And if I come back in 20 minutes, free wallet!”
Hah! da Troof!
“Don’t axe me wut happened to Biff.”
Some lucky soul just found a new best friend … forever …
Next to the word fortuitous in the dictionary is a link to this video.
I’ve taken some deep dives on my board in back country powder but this is a cake taker.
Hold on! I don’t see any beer.
It’s in the fridge that’s plugged into the generator.
My camping includes a 38 foot travel trailer, a generator, and Directv dish.
Billy Boy Gates will deal with you!
And NASCAR
Well, turn off the news.
Yikes!
Get married and won’t be a problem
However, you will now have a whole new set of problems.
This was brought up by Anne Barnhardt a couple of years ago when Jamie Dimond of Chase came down with throat cancer.
Hmm…
Think about this: California is banning Priuses because they’re not “green” ENOUGH.
https://www.cnbc.com/2022/08/25/california-bans-the-sale-of-new-gas-powered-cars-by-2035.html
Has a recycle sticker on a vehicle that has a huge battery that cannot be recycled.
Missing the “Nuke The Gay Whales” sticker.
Nothing a little C4 won’t solve.
An old school Bolo will trip them right up
Until there is a new breakthrough in battery technology, bots like those will not be effective. My worry is a swarm of thousands of armed flying drones. Need a good EMP gun to deal with that.
300 win mag
#8 birdshot (drones)
Like a forensic expert discovered after the nasty fires in Santa Rosa a few years ago, those towers basically microwaved the houses into flames … yet the trees immediately adjacent to those same houses were untouched by the flames. The expert said the houses burned from the inside, out and from the top, down … totally unlike a normal fire.
Good man. We hereby make you an honourary white.
For a day.
And when you’re 67 you go a to g simultaneously.
That’s some messed up shit right there!
This kind of shit will be destroyed as soon as half the population has nothing to eat.
If you gotta wedge a cat in there? That’s the way to do it.
I was upvote #3.
That is disgusting.
Boogers are tasty
I can’t even count how many times I’ve seen crap like this, but I cannot ever remember eating a booger, ever. Not even a nose scratch and lip rub.
I’m starting to wonder if it some kind of weird Masonic/Illuminati thing…