I’M HIP

I knew if I just kept using my LG flip phone long enough, I’d eventually become hip. I’m now a trendsetter. Suck it iMorons!!!

Via SFGate

Forget smartphones — dumbphones are now hip

Smartphones have gained so much significance in our lives that choosing one is a little like choosing a religion. Our preference for either an iPhone or an Android model seems to suggest something fundamental about who we are.

By the terms of this analogy, Tamar Beja would be a nonbeliever.

Beja, a 34-year-old Oakland artist, is a low-tech holdout, the owner of a “dumbphone.” She can use her Samsung Intensity II to talk and text, but that’s about it. And she has no interest in an upgrade — Beja savors the ability to disconnect.

“People always ask me what my relationship with my phone is,” she said. “And I’m like, ‘I don’t have one.’”

Resisters like Beja make up a small portion of U.S. cell phone users — less than 30 percent of mobile accounts (only 13 percent in Beja’s age bracket, 25 to 34), according to Forrester Research. And nearly half of those dumbphone users have incomes under $49,000 a year, suggesting the choice had to do more with economics than preference.

But for those holdouts who resist on principle, their phones represent a decision to opt out of the connected culture. It’s an almost unimaginable — and enviable — luxury. Beja doesn’t regularly check her e-mail. Nor is she tempted to waste time scrolling through Facebook and Instagram on her phone.

“I’m not a complete Luddite,” said Beja. “I just don’t want to be connected all the time. Maybe I’ll try a new restaurant without finding out what Yelp says first. It’s like finding a treasure in a thrift store. There is a lot of adventure missing when you use a smartphone.”

The dumbphone has even acquired celebrity acolytes. Vogue editor Anna Wintour, a one-time iPhone user, was recently spotted clutching a $15 flip phone. Shailene Woodley, the 22-year-old star of “Divergent,” uses one. And Indianapolis Colts quarterback Andrew Luck extolled the virtues of his flip phone in an interview last week on NFL.com.

“It’s just a nice way to not be connected 24/7 with what’s going on in the world,” he said.

As smartphones have become ubiquitous, a growing body of work has attempted to reconcile the consequences of constant connectivity.

In Nicholas Carr’s 2010 book “The Shallows: What the Internet Is Doing to Our Brains,” he argues that constant Web browsing has diminished the brain’s ability to sustain focus and think interpretively. (Carr uses a dumbphone.)

Researchers have found that smartphones can cause stress and make it harder to sleep.

David Meyer, a University of Michigan psychologist who studies multitasking, has seen first hand the downsides of the smartphone: he started using one a year ago, when a frustrated friend bought one for him.

Meyer agrees with Carr’s assessment of the repercussions of those habits: “Your smartphone has turned you into a dumb organism,” he said.

Even so, he often finds himself seduced by the device.

“You get sucked into wanting to do it all the time,” he said. “There is now a pressure to always respond immediately. People literally take their phone to bed.”

“When I retire, I will at least go on iPhone breaks,” he added.

Sara Pritchard, a historian of technology at Cornell University, says her dumbphone helps her to be more productive and forces her to be more thoughtful about how she spends her time. Like most dumbphone users, she feels like it allows her to be “present” — rather than spending dinner with a friend splitting time between the real world and the screen.

But she said there are other advantages. She has a dirt cheap pay-as-you-go plan. AT&T offers a $40 per month plan, half the price of a similar contract for a smartphone. Her phone is 7 years old and works perfectly well, she said, although the logo has worn off and she has no idea who manufactured it.

For Laura Taylor, a 32-year-old Noe Valley nanny and graphic designer, one perk of her flip phone is its sturdy build.

“I could probably use it as a weapon,” she said. “It charges in five minutes and I can go days without charging it again.”

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12 Comments
Billy
Billy
October 6, 2014 7:53 am

“Suck it, iMorons!”

BAHH-HAHAHAH!!

Awesome… just outstanding. I got a 20 buck burn phone with some minutes on it. Makes phone calls and texting is so damn difficult with it, I don’t bother. Let the iFags have their shiny toys, blow staggering amounts of cash on stupid shit and walk around like a goddamned zombie… they’re too stupid to know they’re stupid. Just being milked like a bunch of cows – the next several generations of iShit is already waiting in the wings. They just release them slowly enough to make loads of profit and the iTards don’t know that their cutting edge iShit is outdated the day it’s released…

Meanwhile, I got my several years old black phone that keeps plonking along… and that I ignore most of the time.

Stucky
Stucky
October 6, 2014 8:14 am

It’s hard to be hip, even talking on a flip phone, while shopping for adult diapers.

Lysander
Lysander
October 6, 2014 11:12 am

I still have a console TV (which is not in use), so I’m figuring that some day I may be hip with the hipsters, too.
You know what else I have (he-he)….I gots me a portable 8-track player and a sh*t load of tapes. Soon I could be the Prince of Hip.

TE
TE
October 6, 2014 2:55 pm

I was a long time hold out, finally had to break down and go “smart” because my dad has no internet access but he has a Kindle. I need to be able to check his amazon account and he always waits until I come visit.

Plus work. When I’m at his house I don’t have the ability to log into my network without my “smart” phone.

Thanks to TMobile canceling the cell tower in dad’s town, within 3 months of my signing a two-year contract, I paid for a phone I barely used for far too long.

Then dad was put in the hospital and I had NO SERVICE when I was there helping. So I went forth and bought a $40 phone on a $60 plan, which I dramatically under-utilize but was the cheapest option I could find.

Once dad goes, so will the “smart” phone.

It is bad enough our gubment is monitoring us, I’ll be damned if I’m going to pay $60 for the privilege.

Bostonbob
Bostonbob
October 6, 2014 3:10 pm

TE,
4 T-Mobile lines for $100, no contract. I refuse to get contract mobile plan, it is a huge ripoff. I told my kids they could get whatever phone they chose to buy with their own hard earned money and I would generously pay the mobile phone bill, but would not subsidize the cost purchase of their phones with an over priced plan. I have no problem with someone buying a decent phone, but the idiots I saw at the T-mobile store purchasing crap that they really do not need boggles my mind. I would never have even gone to a T-Mobile store but for my wife. I purchased my phone unlocked on line and did all of my work setting it up on line without talking to a person. Just the way I like it.
Bob.

John the bruce
John the bruce
October 6, 2014 3:11 pm

Wifi only tablet, magic jack, and a corded phone

I want you all to picture that combo
It works, and it is way cheaper a year than a month of any type of cel service

If you live close enuf to your neighbors, you can share a net connection via a central wifi, and lower your bills substantially
I am at under 15 bucks a month for imitation cel, phone, net, and tv

whatever
whatever
October 6, 2014 7:36 pm

The only phone I have plugs into the wall in the living room. I never answer it anyway. I hate the phone.

Iska Waran
Iska Waran
October 6, 2014 9:46 pm

My unwillingness to switch from dumb to smart phone really pisses off my wife. I don’t get it. I like to use things until they’re worn out – cars, shoes, phones, etc. I’m like a Lakota using every part of the bison. Besides, all smart phone users will eventually get run over in a crosswalk.

Chen
Chen
October 6, 2014 10:54 pm

If you accidentally place your flip phone or any cellie next to the alarm clock you can hear it chirp didit da, didit da, brrrrrrp, all night long as your snitch phone tries to silent fart up to big brother.

NoEffingWay
NoEffingWay
October 7, 2014 8:53 am

I have had my LG VX6000 since April of 2004. It makes phone calls, can text in a pinch and takes really awful pictures.

I am not hip.

flash
flash
October 7, 2014 9:14 am

one for super sleuth …made me laugh…have another doughnut Nancy…you’re looking fine.

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flash
flash
October 7, 2014 9:15 am

15 bucks a pop at Wally World..takes care of the occasional jabber jones..and that’s enough for me.

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