Cops: Pantsless Motorist Killed In Crash Was Masturbating While Watching Porn Flick On His Phone
A Detroit man who died early Sunday in a one-car crash was pantsless and masturbating while watching a pornographic movie on his cell phone, according to police who investigated the accident.
The rollover crash occurred around 3:40 AM as motorist Clifford Ray Jones, 58, was driving a 1996 Toyota on a freeway near Interstate 75.
Michigan State Police officials report that Jones became “distracted” while watching the film and lost control of the car, which overturned. Jones, who was not wearing a seat belt, was partially ejected through the car’s sun roof and died on the scene,
Accident investigators discovered that Jones, who was alone in the Toyota, was not wearing pants at the time of the crash.
We need tough Cell Phone Control laws, like ShitCago.
Sometimes you have just got to rub one out!
He was ejaculated through the car’s sun roof…
But did he get off before he got offed?
Penn Head ,where is the empathy .Put yourself in his place.
What a bad ‘stroke’ of luck…..
puts a whole new meaning to…………. cliff diving
I suppose there are worse ways to die……
Was it a 2 stroke or 4 stroke ?
@Dutchman: he had a wankel, so it was probably a Mazda.
When the attending Highway Patrol Officer was asked if this was a particularly bad accident, he replied: Comme si, comme sa…
whew…thought that was going to be a New Jersey story, there for a minute.
The Police Report says the accident was caused by a fatal hard attack.
58? ’96 Toyota? This was no accident. Maybe more boomers should do a rolling flash mob circle jerk.
Theme song: Bad moon rising.
So I guess this what happens when u racheted it up a notch from closet rod swing.
Theme song: driving my life away.
It’s called hot rodding
Theme song: Shaft
Was this a new form auto-erotic asphyxiation?
I guess he had his hands full while trying to drive..not a good strategy if you ask me.
No enough hands to work the steering wheel, the gear shift, the phone and the 5 speed dick shift.
Oh yeah, he gets the Darwin Award.