MSNBC Reports Republican Voter Registration Tent Deliberately Rammed Unsuspecting Van In Florida

Via The Babylon Bee

JACKSONVILLE, FL—MSNBC has reported that a Republican voter registration tent deliberately rammed an innocent van that was just minding its own business at the Kernan Village Shopping Center Saturday afternoon.

“This is what Trump’s dangerous rhetoric does — it radicalizes even inanimate objects like E-Z UPs,” said a solemn MSNBC reporter on the scene. “Now, vans can’t even take a pleasant Saturday drive through a shopping center without getting assaulted by a Trump voter registration tent.”

“It’s truly terrifying.”

According to the cable channel’s description of the events, the van was driving through the parking lot, probably helping orphans and immigrants or something, when the tent became enraged and attacked the van in broad daylight, yelling racist slogans like “Make America Great Again!” and “America is not all bad!” The tent also reportedly fired its AR-16 with a long clip into the air at a rate of thousands of magazines per minute.

CNN is currently digging through the tent’s old tweets.

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8 Comments
Anonymous
Anonymous
February 11, 2020 1:25 pm

Just think about the damage the Tesla tent would do if it were a deplorable. (Gasp)

Ginger
Ginger
  Anonymous
February 11, 2020 5:37 pm

The Tesla tent unfortunately was lost in the Tham Luang Nang Non cave. Even to this day local legend says the sound of it flopping around, lost in the darkness, is heard by natives, along with a lonesome voice, pleading for the submarine that never came.

TC
TC
February 11, 2020 3:02 pm

With the 24×7 vitriol in all forms of media against white people, and especially conservative white people, shit like this is no surprise and will only get worse.

Jim in Va.
Jim in Va.
February 11, 2020 3:13 pm

Good reason to knock down those homeless tent cities before they attack someone.

TN Patriot
TN Patriot
  Jim in Va.
February 11, 2020 3:29 pm

Dat be raciss. Eerbody know dat only trump tents be dangerous

Tony Orlando and Dawn of the Apocalypse (EC)
Tony Orlando and Dawn of the Apocalypse (EC)
February 11, 2020 3:25 pm

I wonder if they will find Nazi paraphernalia and pro-Hitler MAGA logos?

nkit
nkit
February 12, 2020 12:05 am

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