HOUSTON, TX—Fresh off his afternoon nap, presidential candidate Joe Biden gave a fiery, high-energy speech in Houston today, claiming to be the only candidate who could beat incumbent Ronald Reagan.
“I am the only candidate who can unite the party to defeat Reagan,” he said to scattered applause. “When Super Thursday hits here in a few weeks, we can rally the 150 million Democrats here in the great country of Texas to vote for me so we can get Reagan and his crony Dick Cheney off the Iron Throne there in the Imperial Senate. Go Hoosiers!”
Aides scrambled to turn off Biden’s mic but he beat them away with his walker.
“The time has come for the reign of Tippecanoe and Tyler too to end!” he shouted, though by this point he had wandered into a nearby field and no one could hear him.
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That’s some funny shit right there.
Sorry I missed it.
My thoughts exactly, very funny shit!
…and when he does win he said he’ll be the first to APPOINT a black female to the senate. OMG, he’s freaking brain dead.
I’m pretty sure dead Reagan could still beat brain dead Biden. Dead people voting could make sure they “win it for the Gipper”.
Waiting for old Joe to tell us how rough he will be on Nikita Khrushchev.
Great.
Then we could have another fake assassination attempt and have a senile Democrat version of Bush at the helm for 12 years.
The alzheimer’s plaques are getting thick.
Corn Pop for VP!
We all owe Joe Biden a massive, even payable, debt of gratitude. After all it was Joe who convinced George Washington to lead the Continental’s military forces instead of the King’s forces during the American revolution. Just think, if Joe wasn’t there, there wouldn’t even be a United States of America.
Joe tried, but failed, to convince Robert E. Lee to lead Federal forces during the Civil War, but Joe feels bad about not having been eloquent enough to accomplish that every single day. Joe almost saved hundreds of thousands of lives in that bloody struggle, but his silver tongue came up just a little short that time, and that is when the ‘sniffing little girls hair’ thing started as an expression of his grief.
Wait a minute there, Biden wasn’t alone he had help from Brian Williams.
so where is the audio so i can here it for my self. I see alot of the quote but no audio, does anyone have it so i can listen please
It is fake from a satire site. This website is pretty daft for reposting it. Biden says enough stupid stuff to not make stuff up…
This is from the Babylon Bee. Its satire not real. Biden is an idiot, but didnt say this. Why would you repost??????