How to Talk to Your Children About Elizabeth Warren

Guest Post by Ann Coulter

How to Talk to Your Children About Elizabeth Warren

Some people see Elizabeth Warren’s poor showing on Super Tuesday as just another Democratic hopeful losing her bid.

I see something darker. I see the ugly heart that beats beneath our supposed “democracy.” Frankly, I’m afraid.

Warren’s exit from the race is Brett Kavanaugh’s sneering grimace as he attempted to rape and murder Christine Blasey Ford [editor’s note: allegedly]; it is the smirks on the faces of those fascist 14-year-old anti-choice fanatics from Covington, Kentucky; it is our president constantly raping every woman in sight.

To my children, I say, you will be OK. I won’t sugarcoat it — this is truly horrible. But once we have recovered from this devastating blow, life will go on. You will put one foot in front of the other and …

OH! IS LIFE EVEN WORTH LIVING ANYMORE???

I know all women across America agree with me. After Warren dropped out, MSNBC’s Lawrence O’Donnell ran “Portraits of Grief” on his nightly show, featuring some of the victims of her failed bid. Rachel Maddow raced to Massachusetts for an exclusive interview with the heroine herself.

And The New York Times published a piece by Sarah Smarsh titled, “I Am Burning With Fury and Grief Over Elizabeth Warren. And I Am Not Alone.”

Let me remind you, the Times is the “Newspaper of Record.”

Some say Smarsh’s op-ed reads like a parody of sexist stereotypes — emotional, childlike, devoid of logic. I say she has proved beyond cavil that Warren’s defeat is an American holocaust.

Her evidence:

FACT: “When Hillary Clinton lost in 2016, it hurt in similar ways … [t]his election, though, I thought Senator Elizabeth Warren … might go to the White House.”

Q.E.D.

FACT: “[M]y father and maternal grandmother were talking politics at my kitchen table in Kansas. ‘This is the best chance that a woman has ever had to become the president,’ said my dad … ‘Now. It’s now.'”

This isn’t anecdotal. Marsh taped the conversation.

FACT: “[Warren] placed fourth in the Nevada caucuses — in spite of thoroughly winning a Las Vegas candidates debate …”

It’s called “science”!

You wonder whether there is a crisis of sexism in America? There you have it, in black and white.

Nevertheless, Smarsh persisted! Although I think her argument was already water-tight, she also went to the beach and read a novel. And guess what she read? A fictional account of the oppression of women in Colonial Massachusetts!

(We can disregard the near-contemporaneous observations of Alexis de Tocqueville: He was a man. Of course, that’s what he’d say.)

In truth, I don’t believe any of this. I think Smarsh’s ramblings could have been written by a 7-year-old.

Her op-ed does, however, illustrate three points:

1) The perniciousness of participation trophies.

When I was a kid, you got a trophy for winning. Now you get a trophy for showing up. The Participation Trophy phenomenon always struck many of us as wrong and aesthetically displeasing. We wondered what would become of children raised in an “Everybody Gets an ‘A'” culture.

Smarsh’s op-ed is the answer. Entire generations of birdbrains expect a trophy when their candidate runs.

2) The mistake we make as a society in sanctifying tantrums.

Whether it’s a Yale co-ed screaming in the face of a faculty member, hurling insults at him over Halloween costumes, or antifa thugs running around in masks smashing things because a conservative speaker is in the vicinity, the lesson to generations of young people has been: Stamping your feet and throwing things will NOT be a wasted effort.

3) Numbers and statistics aren’t liberals’ thing; personal narrative is.

At the risk of hopelessly confusing Brian Williams and Mara Gay, here are some interesting numbers: At least 60% of Democratic votes come from women, according to estimates by Pew and CNN. (This figure isn’t widely advertised: Democrats don’t want people to realize that they are a party of women.)

Warren was rejected by liberal women.

She was also resoundingly nixed by African Americans and Hispanics. Even her bete noire, Michael Bloomberg, beat Warren among black and Hispanic voters.

(Of course, Bloomberg’s shellacking of Warren at the polls must be balanced against Smarsh’s conclusion about Warren “thoroughly winning” the debate where she bashed Bloomberg.)

Mystified by empirical evidence, liberal women think their personal narratives make fascinating reading. After all, it’s about THEM! How do I know Trump is a monster? I’ve gained 20 pounds since his election! Their op-eds should begin, “Dear Diary.”

In lieu of facts, they fill up their columns with pabulum. Smarsh heard two drunks screaming at the kitchen table — as she put it, “alcohol was involved” — and rushed to hit the “record” button. This is gold!

If liberal women could ever learn to formulate an actual argument, someday, instead of boasting “Nevertheless, she persisted,” they might be able to proclaim, “Nevertheless, she prevailed.”

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14 Comments
Gloriously Deplorable Paul
Gloriously Deplorable Paul
March 12, 2020 4:46 pm

The sarcasm is strong in this one.

bigfoot
bigfoot
March 12, 2020 5:09 pm

I’m beginning to hate everyone.

Except for my wife who feeds me.

But then I live only an hour and a half north of Seattle. The very air that drifts up here from there smells cuckoo. The braying of jackasses, the gnashing of teeth, the cries so sorrowful combine so that one can hardly hear the waves hitting the beach, the sussurasing breeze passing through the firs, nor one’s own thoughts of taking an axe to the whole goddamn city.

Neuday
Neuday
  bigfoot
March 12, 2020 7:12 pm

Beginning to hate everyone except your wife? Welcome to TBP.

M G
M G
  Neuday
March 13, 2020 3:56 am

Damn, I don’t have a wife.

Ivan
Ivan
March 12, 2020 5:11 pm

“How to Talk to Your Children About Elizabeth Warren”

Who?

musket
musket
March 12, 2020 5:14 pm

Warren’s entire professional life is based on a fraud………why should anyone trust her to do anything for anyone but for herself.

Anonymous
Anonymous
March 12, 2020 6:11 pm

and yet, she now has a war chest of campaign $$ she can use to out-Bray all the others donkey faced jackasses , and fund other idiots, which was the plan from day one

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
March 12, 2020 7:08 pm

You tell them that Warren didn’t get enough votes or respect SIMPLY because she is a woman, not because she is a pathological liar, a freedom hater, and someone whose voice is worse than fingernails on a chalkboard, and also because our society is evil and misogynistic. Then you explain that Tulsi Gabbard is being treated like shit, and being excluded from the upcoming debate in a carefully calculated manner, even though it would ONLY mean three candidates on stage while nearly half of the delegates are still up for grabs, because the DNC is filled with white male pieces of shit that want to blame everyone else but themselves, while truly excluding her because she opposes non-stop wars that bring massive profits to the puppetmasters that run the DNC. In other words kids – politics is where fecal matter takes human form and destroys freedom and liberty, and if you think what is going on in the DNC is bad, you should hear the story of what the RNC did to Ron Paul and Rick Santorum during the 2008 and 2012 primary campaigns….all to please their globalist puppetmasters.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  MrLiberty
March 13, 2020 2:15 am

That Tulsi chick might ought to think about doing an about face with her policies, become a ‘publican, and watch her get elected in ’24.

Just sayin.

starfcker
starfcker
  MrLiberty
March 13, 2020 2:37 am

While I’m sympathetic to some of your ideas on this, Tulsi Gabbard is being eliminated from the debates because she is no longer a viable candidate. At this stage is a game polling is pointless. The voting has begun. The Democratic electorate has rejected her. That’s what elections are about. Winners and losers. that’s what Ann Coulter is talking about. Winners and losers. Gabbard is a loser in this contest. She had her shot. She didn’t get it done. She’s a liberal birdbrain anyway. An all in, open borders / baby killer. Shrug it off

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
  starfcker
March 13, 2020 10:35 am

She played an important role in keeping forcing the democratic party to appreciate their war-mongering ways. The key point is that she DID qualify for the debate under one set of rules that were changed when they found it convenient and easy to get rid of her selectively. Yeah, the rest of her policies suck, but that is NOT the point. The point is the duplicity of the DNC in wanting to praise itself for all their female candidates, the fact that they supposedly care about people, etc. and then shitting all over a woman of color who wishes to stop the mass killings of innocents in foreign lands that have done absolutely NOTHING to the US.

None Ya Biz
None Ya Biz
  starfcker
March 13, 2020 10:43 am

The electorate or the democrat establishment. Everyone knows in DP they count the dead voters too!

Fatman from Oz
Fatman from Oz
March 12, 2020 10:58 pm

A letter to my son

Dear Son

The lesson to be learnt from this piece of shit is that to get ahead immorally, you must lie, lie and lie some more.

The more you lie the further you get ahead. Remember son, that the super majority of people the world over, are complete fuckwits with the memory of a goldfish and the attention span of a knat. They are there for the taking as most of them would not be aware they were being raped up their flabby arses.

So son, go ahead and rob and rape them as Lieawatha has and does. Whats good for Lieawatha is good for you.

Alas son, be wary of the ones that remember things that you have done. There might come a day when a bunch of these enlightened folk, find you, your wife and your kids and string you all up from the nearest tree for the lying liberties you have taken.

None Ya Biz
None Ya Biz
  Fatman from Oz
March 13, 2020 10:44 am

AKA basically sell your soul to the devil also known as SATAN. Works every time in the earthly kingdoms.