Governor Newsom Claims Rolling Blackouts Are To Show Support For Black Lives Matter

Via The Babylon Bee

SACRAMENTO, CA—In a powerful statement to support the BLM movement, Governor Gavin Newsom has ordered rolling blackouts across the state. The beautiful, powerful message will turn the entire state black: a political statement that can be seen from space.

While many thought the blackouts were due to poor planning and unrealistic green energy requirements, Newsom clarified that he ordered the blackouts as a powerful display supporting BLM.

“Some people post black squares on their Instagram accounts — we’re taking it a step further and turning the whole state completely black,” Newsom said of the rolling blackouts hitting the state. “If you don’t turn off power to your citizens on the hottest day of the year, do you really care about social justice?” Silence ensued. There wasn’t a dry eye in the place as the gathered journalists contemplated their internalized white supremacy. “I didn’t think so.”

Newsom clarified that his own house and winery will remain lit so as to be a “shining beacon in the darkness, a reminder that we can all aspire to do better.”

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3 Comments
BL
BL
September 7, 2020 6:38 pm

It seems to me that if real Americans wanted to riot against this commie takeover, they would be holding BLACK LIVES MATTER and LBGTQ signs while they burned down every state capitol and city hall or governor’s mansion in the whole of this country. All’s fair in love and war and BLM/LBGTQ signs give you a ticket to ride the Riot Express.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  BL
September 8, 2020 12:38 am

Don’t forget the “PRESS” patch sown on the back of the black jacket.

Call me Jack
Call me Jack
September 7, 2020 9:26 pm

We are at the point where satire sounds perfectly reasonable.