Don’t listen to fake news from The New York Times, CNN, or your doctor. Get all your medical information from us at The Babylon Bee.
Anyway, it’s totally time to freak out. Here’s everything you need to know about Omicron:
- It was originally to be called the “Xi Jinping Created COVID in a Lab” variant but was renamed so as not to offend China.
- Omicron was ultimately named after its inventor, Bob Omicron, who works at the Wuhan Institute of Virology.
- Everyone who gets Omicron has a 100% chance of dying someday at some point in the future. Not necessarily of COVID, but of something. It’s a guarantee.
- Omicron is also the name of Optimus Prime’s rival in the Transformers spin-off Beast Wars. Omicron, activate!
- Has killed far fewer people than Democrats’ lockdown policies so far.
- There has been far less panic around Omicron than the government was hoping for, so they’re pushing up the release schedule of the Pi variant to early 2022.
- Pfizer has said their vaccine works against Omicron. In other news, Apple has announced that the iPhone 13 may also provide some protection against the variant, if purchased new and at full price.
- Omicron is far worse than other variants, unless you count deadliness, contagiousness, and severity of symptoms.
- Dr. Fauci has teased a Fauci’s cut of Omicron coming in the Spring for the hardcore fans.
- Studies have found that people who are concerned about Omicron are 729% more likely to be scared little whiny babies.
There you have it. Aren’t you glad you came to us for this important info?
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It is my sincere desire to provide readers of this site with the best unbiased information available, and a forum where it can be discussed openly, as our Founders intended. But it is not easy nor inexpensive to do so, especially when those who wish to prevent us from making the truth known, attack us without mercy on all fronts on a daily basis. So each time you visit the site, I would ask that you consider the value that you receive and have received from The Burning Platform and the community of which you are a vital part. I can't do it all alone, and I need your help and support to keep it alive. Please consider contributing an amount commensurate to the value that you receive from this site and community, or even by becoming a sustaining supporter through periodic contributions. [Burning Platform LLC - PO Box 1520 Kulpsville, PA 19443] or Paypal
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We laugh, but we’re not out of the woods with this farce yet.
https://www.cnn.com/2021/08/12/politics/supreme-court-indiana-university-vaccine-mandate/index.html
I have already predicted SCOTUS will rubber stamp Biden’s mandate. Who writes the majority will be interesting.
Roberts, being a pussy, will probably make Amy Coney Barrett write it up. She’ll gladly do it to show the Left that she’s “not that bad” (from their point of view). The dissents from Alito, Thomas and Gorsuch will be scathing. Kavanaugh may also dissent (because OSHA doesn’t have adequately congressionally-delegated authority).
Canada doesn’t let anyone board a plane or train without proof of vaccination. I wouldn’t put it past the Biden-Harris junta from trying that here – even though only 25% of adults have gotten one of the supposedly vital boosters.
That is possible. It may lead to blood in the streets.
Waiting for the Smallpox/Covid combo product from Gates.
Still the same China antic, from the lying MSM you claim to distrust. You dodge one trap just to jump into another. There is not just one lie, there is not just one trap. You are born to be manipulated, you are born to be enslaved.
Covid has never been isolated.
PCR test are fake tests.
There is no test for the Delta variant.
Ther is no test for the Omicron Variant.
End of story.