Texans Strangely Unconcerned About Global Day Of Jihad

Via Babylon Bee

SWEETWATER, TX — As the rest of the world sits on edge due to the leader of the terrorist organization Hamas calling for a global day of jihad, residents of the state of Texas seemed entirely unconcerned.

“Global day of what now?” asked native Texan Barry Windham as he wiped his freshly oiled AR-15 with a rag. “Not sure I’m familiar with that term. Out here, we don’t really listen to all the stuff going on everywhere else. We’ll let everyone else get all wrapped up in that. Anyway…you ever see what happens to a cantaloupe when you hit it dead-on from about 10 yards away?”

Citizens throughout Texas towns were seen calmly going about their normal business, enjoying the early fall sun, and showing absolutely no worry about the threat of radical Islamic terrorists striking at any moment. “Oh, I think they know better than that,” said Stan Hansen with a smile as he loaded his 12-gauge shotgun with buckshot shells. “There’s a reason you see that type of thing happen in places where folks aren’t allowed to own massive arsenals that take up several rooms of their homes. Those terrorists may want to die, but they apparently don’t want to die badly enough to come to Texas. We’ll make it happen for ‘em!”

At publishing time, no Texan had been found who was willing to provide an argument for being worried about any danger, with everyone instead opting to continue spending their time going from browsing at gun stores to visiting barbecue restaurants for lunch before going to shop at other gun stores.

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6 Comments
The Central Scrutinizer
The Central Scrutinizer
October 15, 2023 10:33 am

Feel good article of the day! Thanks for that.

Anonymous
Anonymous
October 15, 2023 10:38 am

Really? But Lone Star’s border’s wide open . . .

Waves
Waves
October 15, 2023 11:01 am

Satire?? It’s exactly the right thing to do! Though I should have started a lot earlier than CV, for me it’s round two. I’m ignoring it all again as if it doesn’t exist just like I did suddenly realizing between breakfast and lunch March 13, 2020 that I had to turn off the TV for good. For the next 2+ years I was not only unscathed but had a great time totally detached while everyone else got sucked into a dread filled shitshow.

I have fully accepted that it’s all calculated script. ALL. Every headline, picture, story, threat, video is fabricated and very technologically infectious and damaging to even discerning minds. It can now even include the appearance of a ‘human’ speaking. This time it means, as soon as the word Isrxxl or Hxxxs sneaks past my eyes here and there I turn away quick and will continue for life if necessary.

The 100% fabricated media is a very calculated addictive trap that is now more advanced than anyone understands. I see the disarming damage that falling for believing you have to read or watch the shitshow to not miss something to ‘look out for yourself’ causes in minds. They turn into lie repeating stations and look glassy eyed and no longer in control.

The only way to win this mind game is to not play.

Abigail Adams
Abigail Adams
  Waves
October 15, 2023 3:40 pm

Well said & agree 100%.

I’ll just leave my opinion there, so I don’t get accused of virtue signaling or lectured.

Anyway, on to more important topics…had brunch with my family this morning on a beautiful patio in this glorious fall weather. It was perfect. Everyone was happy, including those sitting at other tables or walking by. Life is good. And everything will be ok.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Waves
October 15, 2023 7:28 pm

Yeah. They have totally gone “Wag the Dog.”

Anonymous
Anonymous
October 15, 2023 7:27 pm

Yeah. I remember when the Branch Davidian’s arsenal of half burned weapons was shown on TV. My first thought was,”That’s it?”