26 years ago, Austin-based band Fastball topped the charts with their hit song “The Way.” But the true story behind the song’s inspiration – and how the hit came to be – is even more incredible.
Chapter 1
An exit to eternal summer slacking, but where were they going without ever knowing the way?
It’s a summer tradition, one that takes greater meaning in cities like Salado and Belton.
For Lela and Raymond Howard, that tradition was Pioneer Day in Temple.
“I knew they were going to be going because they went every year,” said Hal Ray Copeland, Lela Howard’s son.
The Howard’s were both on their second marriage, united through a love of the church, and that late-in-life lust to live.
“I think they just enjoyed going and doing things together. Nanny always used to – that’s the main word she stood by is ‘go’,” said Rhonda Alford Coleman, Lela Howard’s granddaughter.
And on Saturday, June 29, 1997, “go” was on their mind.
On the mind of their loved ones – concerns over their memories.
Raymond, 88, had recently had brain surgery, and Lela, 83, was showing symptoms of memory loss.
“You know on Saturdays, when I said when I would come out here, I started noticing a few things. She’d leave something on the stove, and we’d be fixing her hair – and I’d say I got to go check on whatever she had. She’d go ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about,” said Coleman.
Their concerns rose to a point where they tried to prevent them from driving.
“We kind of hid the keys for a little while,” Coleman said.
By June 1997, Lela Howard was doing the majority of the driving for the couple.
“She called me and crying and said she couldn’t find her keys, and I couldn’t stand (her crying),” Copeland explained, adding he eventually relented and gave her the keys back. “I could feel how she hurt.”
Even with the memory loss issues, the family said Lela drove often, and did so well.
But when it came time for the Pioneer Day Festival, the family offered to assist.
“I said ‘do you want me to go with you, and drive the car?’ She said, ‘oh no, we’ll be fine’,” said Copeland.
Chapter 2
Anyone can see the road that they walk on is paved in gold. It’s always summer they’ll never get cold. They’ll never get hungry, they’ll never get old and gray.
The trip from their Belton home to Temple was 10 miles – fifteen minutes tops.
“They’d stay until about 3 usually. When it got 5, and they weren’t home, and then it was 8 and they weren’t home, I went out to the TV stations, and they put it on TV that night, ” Coleman recalled, adding they immediately knew something was amiss.
“We called the officers, and they came right on out. (We) had no clue whatsoever, we had no idea,” said Copeland.
The family drove to the local Wal-Mart, where the Howards would stop in daily for a coffee and donut, but found no sign of them there.
Their disappearance gained widespread media attention, including in the Austin-American Statesman. At the time, the manager for Austin-based band Fastball encouraged their lead singer Tony Scalzo to look to the newspaper for inspiration.
“Our first album was called ‘Make Your Mama Proud.’ As hard as we worked to make it and promote it, we were still basically running a college-market. We didn’t really have an established sound. Where that record sound indicated where we were going, wasn’t really where we wanted to go,” said Scalzo.
Along with Scalzo, the band features guitarist and singer Miles Zuniga, and drummer Joey Shuffield.
Trying to come up with new material for their second album, Scalzo took their manager’s advice and turned to the newspaper.
“I looked in, right away this story sort of struck me. It was sort of an ongoing story. Still no developments in the case of the missing couple,” Scalzo said.
As he read more and more, the wheels started moving in his mind.
“I just started getting these ideas, well maybe they don’t want to be found, maybe they’re just like – they’re sick of being responsible and they just want to go out and have fun,” Scalzo explained.
Within a few hours, Scalzo had developed the bulk of the song, all as authorities were still searching high and low for the Howards.
CHAPTER 3
They just drove off and left it all behind them. Where were they going, without ever knowing the way?
“The police got a lot of calls about seeing them, seeing them different places. Finding an older couple in a certain type of car, and we kind of got our hopes up that first week,” said Coleman.
“They got pulled over one time by a cop – he questioned them, but he let them go,” Lela Howard’s grandson, Randy Alford, explained.
An officer in Arkansas – hundreds of miles from Salado – had stopped the Howards for driving without their lights on.
The cop flicked the headlights on for the couple – then let them go.
“We can’t figure out how they got through Dallas. Haven’t figured it out yet,” said Coleman, her mind still flummoxed by the trip.
Lela Howard had family in Arkansas and was familiar with the area.
“In her right mind, [Lela] would have called and found Nadine (her relative),” Coleman said.
“They were about a mile from my cousin’s house when [the officer] stopped them,” Copeland said.
At the time – the officer didn’t know they were missing.
The stop did, however, narrow the search area.
Still, with no answers, the saga continued.
“Biggest nightmare of my life,” Coleman said.
“[We] didn’t know anything,” Copeland said. During that time, he made three separate trips from Salado to Arkansas, searching the area they were last seen – hopeful to find them.
Each time, he left empty-handed. Finally, on Day 13, a break in the search.
“Two boys, walking home from a video store. Their father left them at the video store and they were going to walk home. As they walked home, they walked by this little creek area. And it had a strong smell, a strong odor, so when they got home, they told their parents, and that’s when all of it started,” said Coleman.
When cops checked the area, they found the maroon Oldsmobile the Howards were driving – at the bottom of a 25-foot cliff near Hot Springs, Arkansas.
“It was a relief. Because a lot of families don’t have that closure. And that must be very hard,” said Alford.
CHAPTER 4
You can see their shadows wandering off somewhere, They won’t make it home but they really don’t care, they wanted the highway, they’re happier there today, today
On a conference call – Fastball and its managers were discussing what song would be the single on their new album.
“Our manager just blurts out – what about that song ‘The Way?’ Why don’t you just go ahead and try that?” Scalzo explained.
After the decision was made, the song was sent to radio stations across the country.
“Little pockets, like Birmingham, Alabama, here and Salt Lake City. And little by little, people started paying attention. The radio started paying attention. The label starts paying attention, and not only that – a buzz is created in the industry and people from other labels start gravitating towards working for Hollywood (Fastball’s label at the time),” Scalzo explained.
The Howards’ family didn’t initially know that ‘The Way’ was about Lela and Raymond, but the similarities to their story were apparent.
“That sounded like Momma and Mr. Howard – the way they died. You could tell by the way it sounded,” Copeland recalled.
“I thought ‘that’s exactly what happened. That’s what they did. They just drove away,'” said Coleman.
A few days later – Copeland’s beliefs were confirmed. What had quickly become the #1 song in the country was a living tribute to his mother.
“I liked it, really. I liked the song (a lot),” said Copeland.
“I was just blown away, I just couldn’t believe somebody would do something like that for my grandma,” added Alford. “Powerful, very powerful.”
“My cousin said (Lela) left a star. On TV all the time, a song about her. She would have loved that,” Copeland said.
The album ended up going Platinum and made the band worldwide sensations. For seven weeks, it topped the charts, taking the band across the award show circuit.
“I believe that the song, in particular, it’s a strong song. I think it’s a strong song musically, it’s a strong song in the way it was put together musically and lyrically, I think it’s one of the best things I’ve done. At the same time, I think a lot of its power comes from the story behind it. And I somehow put together this musical piece that was enhanced by the story, and I also believe the story, for the family and the people involved, was enhanced by the song,” said Scalzo.
And 19 years later – the song is still on the airwaves; its meaning far surpassing its platinum status.
“No one else has a story like that. There are other stories, but it’s not this story,” said Scalzo.
As for Fastball, they’re currently on a cross-country tour, promoting their first new album, Shine Into Light, in eight years.
“Every single night (of this tour), 46 shows out on the road, with a big audience, every single [crowd] sang the whole song. They know all the words. They sang it. Amazing. They sing it loud,” Scalzo said.
They’re also working on a 20th-anniversary release of “All the Pain Money Can Buy,” the album which featured “The Way.”
The lyrics still hit home for a family still missing their loved ones.
“Amazing. And [Lela] deserved it. She was very special,” said Coleman.
“I think the song is the closure part of it. It’s the final deal to the whole story,” said Alford.
July 2017 marked twenty years since the Howards’ passing.
“It seems like yesterday to me,” said Copeland.
While Lela was never diagnosed with Alzheimer’s during her life, her family said she displayed some symptoms.
“I think at that point it opened up a whole new awareness for those with Alzheimer’s (and memory loss/dementia), opened up the doors to a big problem we have in this country,” Alford said.
“Early in the morning, (Lela’s) mind would be pretty good. But as the day wore on, that’s when it got worse,” said Copeland.
To learn more about Alzheimer’s Disease, click here.
As we concluded our interview with Lela Howard’s family, Coleman read aloud the lyrics to the song. As she battled emotions, the words took on a far more personal meaning.
“They left before the sun came up that day. They just drove off and left it all behind them. Where were they going without ever knowing the way?”
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Better to die free in a ditch than live on your knees in the comfort of confined care.
If I ever have to go to a home, I’ll dial 1-800-KVRKIAN and end it all.
Cool post Admin.
Like the song, and the story behind it, too.
The way this country is going we are all going to go over the cliff with the top down. At least they went together not leaving one to grieve.
I really liked the song.
I recall a story years ago about an elderly couple doing something similar in the remote desert SW. Headed out for a short trip, got off the paved roadway and started down a rutted desert wash, eventually got stuck and perished in the elements. I suppose it would be more merciful to go over a cliff and die instantly rather than slowly and perhaps painfully due to exposure. Tragic either way
Fascinating, but sad, and it could have been even more tragic.
My father was struggling with dementia. His typical Sunday was to drive 10 minutes to the grocery store to get the Sunday paper.
My mom called me on a mid February Michigan day (cold and snowy) 2:30pm to say dad left at 9:30am and hadn’t returned yet. Fearing a car jacking we looked at the stores security cameras, and they had his car leaving the parking lot and turning right instead of left towards home.
A right turn would mean a long two lane road heading north with lots of east west turn offs, or the four lane highway heading north or south with a shit ton more exits.
Long story after a massive search. My idea was to shut his credit cards off so when he went to get gas, he would be stranded and we just might get a call. The credit card companies said we can’t do that, only dad can.
Anyway, he was four hours north in a small town in upper Michigan getting gas. He asked the lady for directions back towards home, got them and walked out, but he came back in 10 minutes later asking for directions again. This time the manager asked him if he was hungry or thirsty, gave him a Coke and a candy bar, then asked for his drivers license. She called my mom and we drove up to get him and bring him home.
Once at home I told dad I was taking the keys and selling the car. When he protested that he has a right to drive, I told him I agree yes you do. If you go out and drive into a ditch, or a tree, or a concrete wall and kill yourself. I can live with that.
But if you go out and run into a car, or pedestrians killing or injuring innocent people, I could not live with myself.
I didn’t care how much he yelled at me over the next month, the car was sold in two weeks, we all took turns driving them anywhere they needed to go, and most times it was just for a ride down to Lake Michigan or out to get an ice-cream.
That’s good logic, card.
Mobile independence is a tough thing to let go of, and the elders who get that forcibly taken from them sometimes get upset about it.
Similarly, when they are a risk to themselves and others living in close proximity, for leaving gas stove manifolds open, or ovens on with things like wooden handle pots and pans inside. At that point, a move to an assisted living facility, or even worse, a nursing home is difficult for some to accept.
FWIW, I had a parent who was physically OK, but the dementia and Alzheimers progressed to a point where an intervention was necessary.
The silver lining is, we told her we were moving her into an apartment where more of her contemporaries lived, so she could socialize & meet new friends her age.
But yes, it is a sad thing to experience.
When they don’t even recognize their children anymore, it stings.
Joined my first band in Temple,there was two places to play,The Flagon and the Peppermint lounge……both owned by the same owner……
Screws Loose was the name……after the show everybody would go down below the dam and jam til the sun came up………what a time …..!….
This may be kind of a trivial point, but how often does something published for worldwide distribution chronicle an event that happened in your neck of the woods. It just so happened the cliff they ran off of was actually more of a bluff. They had come to a stop sign that dead ended at another highway. And on a downhill slope it was. Very easy to just run right through that stop sign, over the bluff and down into that creek. The foliage and underbrush was heavy where they went through, that car went through there and the brush closed behind them Almost like they had disappeared into water. Not visible from the road, yet not a stones throw from it. I drove past it many times leading up to the discovery of the accident scene, lived just a couple of miles from there. I heard it was a pretty terrible scene, and reportedly the rescue team had to deal with an infestation of water moccasins in the creek they ran into.
Maybe so but I they were both in heaaven.
Great article Admin. Never knew there was a real story behind this song.
I prefer the Rocky Mountain Way…because it’s better than the way we had!
Worst rendition EVER!