Psst… I Think The President Is Totally Senile

Guest Post by Kurt Schlichter

Look, I don’t want to shock you, but I think that our alleged President is senile. Really. Hear me out. Now look, I understand that the regime media teaches that he is a vigorous go-getter taking the lead on important issues and making America safer, more prosperous, and more equitable, but I’m concerned, folks. Maybe I’m off base, but I’m having doubts. I think the evidence is increasingly clear that he’s a senile old pervert who showered with his daughter, as well as a neo-communist serial liar whose inability to tell the truth is matched only by his grubby corruption. Other than that, he’s fine.

And I am glad he’s the Democrat nominee for President. I believe he’s going to hold onto that office with his bony claws right up through election day. And I think he has a substantial chance of losing to Donald Trump. I didn’t use to, but I’m happy to say America is waking up. Voters can’t ignore Grandpa Badfinger’s failures and foolishness any longer.

The people purportedly helping him are actually hurting him, which is great to watch. I particularly loved when he decided to tell the world that cannibals consumed Uncle Bosie. Now, let me say that again because I want to ensure you got it. The alleged President of the United States looked at the camera and told America that cannibals ate his uncle.

Cannibals did not eat his uncle.

And you would think that this bizarre lie about his uncle being an hors d’oeuvre would’ve been enough, but in the same series of incoherent sentences, he also managed to confuse Pearl Harbor with D-Day, get the day of the week wrong, and draw in Beau Biden’s death, which now occurred in action in Iraq, or Afghanistan, or wherever else it is useful for him to claim it happened. At least he left out his classic lie that the other driver in the accident that killed his first wife was drunk. This milking the death of relatives thing has become a habit.

He told this particular set of lies in the course of slandering Trump about the troops. Honest Joe was reviving that old “losers and suckers” lie that all of us veterans recognize as a lie. Joe Biden’s not a veteran. That’s because of another lie. Whatever happened to that asthma that kept our Commander-in-Crusty out of ‘Nam anyway? Was a stammer enough to get a deferment, too?

There I go, picking on him because of his stammer. Oh, and his senility, lies, corruption, and perversion, but yeah, also his stammer.

And then his handlers had him stagger into a gas station to show how Scranton Joe is a real person who knows how to interact with real people. We saw a bunch of citizens who didn’t even feel obligated to stand up in the presence of the President. That’s the kind of aura of leadership we want – local yokels shrugging at the shuffling zombie coming in for a quick photo op with the swing state rubes before heading back out to the Delaware beach house he bought with Chinese bribes. He didn’t bring Hunter with him, which is probably good because somebody might’ve accidentally got him filching coins out of the take a penny, leave a penny tray. Of course, had that happened, the regime media would not have run it. They did not run the story of Hunter’s perversion-ridden, corruption-filled laptop because that was allegedly Russian disinformation. The First Failson’s peccadillos, of course, are the fault of Putin for reasons, and shut up because you’re a transphobe.

They covered for Joe on Cannibalgate as well. Hilariously, the story about his bizarre I-tied-an-onion-to-my-belt-which-was-the-style-at-the-time ramblings was headlined “Biden is off on details of his uncle’s WWII death as he calls Trump unfit to lead the military.” Falsely claiming that your uncle goy tossed into a boiling pot and consumed by local tribesmen is not messing up some minor detail. Saying something happened in the late morning rather than the early afternoon is a minor detail. Asserting that  Dahmerriffic individuals with bones through their noses munched on Uncle Bosie is a major detail. Now, we all appreciate the service of Uncle Bosie, even though he wasn’t the super jet pilot war hero Biden pretends he was to burnish Joe’s own pathetic reputation, but cannibals didn’t eat him, and whatever glory accrues to him does not transfer to his nitwit nephew.

I’m laughing at all the Democrat politicians taking a look at all the polls which show Donald Trump ahead in the battleground states. If you recall, Trump has never been consistently ahead before. He wasn’t ahead in 2016 consistently, and he was barely ever even in any poll in 2020. But now he is, consistently, and they’ve got to be scared. They’ve got to be especially terrified because of the tendency of people to hide their support for Donald Trump. The silent Trumpers are a real threat. Now, a sane party would somehow get rid of the desiccated zombie they have nominated, but the one smart thing Joe Biden never did was take out the greatest insurance policy any politician ever had – Kamala Harris. She’s even more despised than he is, though she’s about as coherent.

Much of the talk about how he will be shuffled off stage and somebody else will be slipped in to bring in the big win is all just magical thinking. It’s Biden. They bought that ticket to ride and they’re riding it to the end of the line.

I did something no one’s ever done with Joe Biden, which is underestimate him. I underestimated his amazing power to fail. He has failed at everything. The economy is a disaster. You can’t go to McDonald’s, order two Big Macs, a large fries, and a small Diet Coke, and walk out without paying 30 bucks. Hell, try and buy a house. America’s a foreign policy joke. Biden attacks our allies and defends our enemies. And remember that pier he was going to build to feed the terrorists in Gaza? That doesn’t appear likely to happen, not because he suddenly realized how stupid the idea was, but because the Navy ships he sent there either broke down or caught fire.

This guy is a disaster, a catastrophe, a walking, whisper-talking clusterfark, and the Democrats own him. He’s all theirs. He’s not going anywhere. They nominated him, and now they’ve got to deal with it. The bogus kangaroo court conviction that Donald Trump is facing in New York is not going to save Biden – can you imagine somebody at this point thinking, “Well, a jury of New York liberals and a judge whose daughter works for the Democrats convicted Trump of something I can’t quite explain so I’m going to accept inflation and national humiliation in order to re-elect Joe Biden?” Nope.

This guy is going down, and I don’t mean tumbling down the stairs of Air Force One, but you know that’s in the cards, too.

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21 Comments
The Central Scrutinizer
The Central Scrutinizer
April 22, 2024 8:11 am

Caligula must die.

Kennyboy
Kennyboy
  The Central Scrutinizer
April 22, 2024 8:41 am

LIKE IN, NOTHING CAN BE DONE TO STOP HIM…BY THE SAME “CREATURES” WHO ARRANGED FOR HIM TO OCCUPY THE “WHITE HOUSE” IN THE FIRST PLACE???
THE OFFICE OF “PRESIDENT” IS ACTUALLY A “PUPPET”…REMEMBER???
THEREFORE…WHAT NEEDS TO BE REMOVED ARE THE “PUPPET MASTER’S”!
THEY ARE THE “ZIONIST WHITE PEOPLE”…YOU KNOW, THE CREEPS WHO LIVE BY THE “DEATH CODE”…LIVE & LET DIE….RE-MEM-BER???

Ursel Doran
Ursel Doran
  Kennyboy
April 22, 2024 11:23 am

His puppet master reviewed here.

Anon y mous
Anon y mous
  Kennyboy
April 22, 2024 5:08 pm

SPEAK UP BOY, I CANT HEAR YOU!

Colorado Artist
Colorado Artist
  Kennyboy
April 22, 2024 7:42 pm

Ken, you’re yelling.
And you’re insane.

re-mem-ber Mk Ultra…..

Capt Barty
Capt Barty
  The Central Scrutinizer
April 22, 2024 9:28 am

Remember that Caligula’s own guards killed him.

Colorado Artist
Colorado Artist
  Capt Barty
April 22, 2024 7:45 pm

Pedo Joe is FAR too useful to kill.
He’s like Jeffery Dahmer’s Drano skull drilled and filled Philipino rent boys.
A toy for serial killing pedophiles in power.

ordo ab chao
ordo ab chao
April 22, 2024 8:39 am

I have been exercising my index fingers on BOTH hands cause I plan on votin really, really hard this fall!

Kurt ‘the turd’ Shytster

annuit coeptis novus ordo seclorum

^^^^^^ ^^^^^^^ – who approves this undertaking?

flash
flash
April 22, 2024 8:54 am

And, before senile, he was insane, but aren’t they all ?

Anonymous
Anonymous
  flash
April 22, 2024 9:25 am

Before insane he was stupid, and not all of them have been that.

Anonymouse
Anonymouse
  Anonymous
April 22, 2024 11:49 am

Brandon makes AOC look intelligent…I can see the DNC planning the convention…Big Mike & AOC 2024

Colorado Artist
Colorado Artist
  Anonymouse
April 22, 2024 7:47 pm

Joe is Fredo Corleone.
A stupid, egotistical, venal tool for the real criminals in power.
And he’ll be taken fishing when he is no longer useful.

Anon y mous
Anon y mous
  flash
April 22, 2024 5:09 pm

Before he was senile, he was stupid and a pervert and a crook!

Anonymous
Anonymous
April 22, 2024 9:24 am

Psst… I Think Know The President Is Totally Senile

Lee Harvey Griswald
Lee Harvey Griswald
April 22, 2024 9:29 am

For Joey

The Central Scrutinizer
The Central Scrutinizer
  Lee Harvey Griswald
April 24, 2024 10:23 am

You’ve given me a lot to think about this morning! Who am I going to share this with? How does this apply to my own life? Why is that lady walking funny?

Thanks!

Capt Barty
Capt Barty
April 22, 2024 9:30 am

There’s a commercial on TV about some drug to help with the angry outbursts of senility. The lead-in shows an old lady scowling and shouting.
It should look familiar.

Claude
Claude
April 22, 2024 10:08 am

The Democrats know all of this and they don’t care. Their plan is to burn it all down and run with the loot. If Trump wins, it doesn’t matter because they will get him into two wars that he can’t get out of, and a collapsed banking system that he can’t fix. All backed up with all of the intelligence agencies subverting him, all colluding with the techies handling the “misinformation” .

GCE
GCE
April 22, 2024 11:17 am

I love Kurt’s comedy columns. Voat harder Kurt, voat harder.

Anonymouse
Anonymouse
April 22, 2024 11:45 am

“Psst… I Think The President Is Totally Senile”
Obviously if the drooling pedo was your dog…you’d have him put down.

Ned
Ned
April 22, 2024 6:12 pm

Joe Biden is and always has been a totally worthless, corrupt POS.