Guest Post by Kurt Schlichter
The speculation over Donald Trump’s veep pick is heating up, and his potential choices’ respective pole positions have changed a lot since the last time I wrote about this. Now, I’ve been pretty clear that there were three main criteria for picking a running mate. One, the appointment cannot hurt the GOP, like by putting a seat at risk. Two, the nominee must be competent to be president. Three, the pick must bring something to the table as far as winning the election. And I guess I now have to add a fourth qualification. The nominee can’t have shot any puppies.
Now, I wouldn’t think that I would have to tell anybody that shooting puppies is a bad idea if you want to be elected by the American people. Americans like puppies. They don’t like people who shoot puppies. So, the thought process of anybody who wants to be liked by the American people admitting to shooting puppies escapes me.
Yet, Kristi Noem capped Cricket the dog and then wrote about it in her book. Besides being bizarre and cruel, this was politically insane. It’s totally disqualifying, and apparently Donald Trump agrees because rumor has it that she’s off his shortlist. Somewhere across the rainbow bridge, Cricket is wagging her tail as she watches Noem’s political future dragged to the gravel pit and given the Joe Pesci in “Goodfellas” treatment.
Now, Noem was terrible anyway. Her country-girl affectation was tiresome, and as soon as the Chamber of Commerce cried, she immediately betrayed young women and refused to stop men pretending to be women from stealing their sports. But you can come back from betraying the base – not for folks like you and me, but for other, softer Republicans. There are lots of pols who have flirted with establishment RINOism and come back. Hi, Marco Rubio. But you just can’t come back from shooting puppies.
I understand that rural people and farmers look at animals a little differently than BMW-driving lawyers from the big city. I get that. I also get that you can’t shoot puppies and be a successful vice presidential candidate. Hear me out. A lot of people do not dig shooting puppies. Call them ignorant, call them uptight, whatever. They just can’t get past you shooting puppies.
You’re not going to talk this huge percentage of Americans into thinking shooting puppies is okay. When it came out that Noem shot a puppy, Twitter exploded with all these horrible arguments about how it was really no biggie that she shot a puppy. Cricket was a bad dog. Cricket was untrainable. Cricket killed chickens, but so did Colonel Sanders and no one thinks he should have been led to the gravel pit.
Look, these rationalizations for shooting a puppy are never going to fly among the suburban people – or for a lot of country and farm people too, since many of them also strongly oppose shooting puppies. The anti-shooting puppies demographic is huge, and Trump needs it to vote for his ticket.
You are not going to talk them out of their opposition to shooting puppies, especially with lame arguments like that it wasn’t really a puppy because it was 14 months old. I argue things to people on juries for a living. Let me explain what kind of argument that is. That’s a terrible argument. Here’s my rule of thumb. I never want to have to defend somebody for shooting puppies.
He cannot pick Noem. There is no way that we Republicans want to spend the next six months when we should be talking about how Biden is turning this country into a communist hellhole of economic despair, fat commie campus mutants, and foreign policy humiliation, trying to articulate a defense of shooting puppies so that Kristi can live her dream of getting the hell out of South Dakota.
Again, you can’t be the vice president and have shot puppies. Like the term “fetch,” if you pardon the expression, it’s just not going to happen.
Now that we have established that Trump will not pick the woman who probably cried at the beginning of “Old Yeller” and who wondered why John Wick was so darn upset, the question remains as to who it will be. Well, Donald Trump met with Ron DeSantis recently, and apparently it was a love fest. They’ve buried the hatchet, and not in each other’s skull. That’s good for the party regardless, but could it indicate that Trump is considering selecting the Florida governor for a unity ticket? Big D will certainly not harm the ticket, and he can certainly do the job of President. DeSantis also brings a track record of competence that reassures the swing voters. He also brings a lot of the reluctant DeSantis people back. Now, there are a few DeSantis folks who are effectively Never Trump, and you’re not going to get them until they look at the chaos on our campuses and everywhere else and decide to put aside their fits of pique and get with the program. But every vote counts.
Is it good for DeSantis’s career to be on the ticket? He is certainly going to run in 2028, so does it make sense to tie himself to Donald Trump, who looks like he’s got a pretty good chance of winning in November? I don’t know. But I do have to praise Ron DeSantis’s troll game. As soon as the revelation that Noem shot a puppy came out, he and all his people’s Twitter timelines were filled with pictures of them cavorting with canines. So, it’s clear that Ron DeSantis meets the fourth basic VP characteristic. He hasn’t shot any puppies.
Glenn Youngkin of Virginia is apparently near the top of Trump’s list. He won’t harm the ticket because his seat will go to Winsome Sears. He is certainly competent. He makes the Democrats spend money in Virginia, donors dig him, and he reassures the kind of wussy conservatives who find Trump’s aggressive heterosexuality and Twitter game off-putting. And he’s never shot any puppies.
Another governor rising in the polls is Doug Burgum of that other Dakota, the one where the governor doesn’t shoot puppies. His seat is safe Republican, and he is clearly competent. He’s also a soothing presence for the squishes, and the dude has money for days. These are great characteristics, but perhaps his best quality is that he has never shot any puppies.
I’m a big fan of Robert O’Brien and JD Vance for a number of reasons. The new, improved, and less thirsty Marco Rubio might work. Kim Reynolds, the Iowa governor, is a good choice, as is Sarah Huckabee Sanders of Arkansas. They are all strong veep flexes, in part because none of them have shot any puppies.
Some of the previous favorites are falling behind. The bizarre notion that Robert Kennedy, Jr., might be a Republican vice-presidential candidate seems to have disappeared. Tulsi Gabbard appears to be fading. They are Democrats, which disqualifies them from being Republican nominees – duh – but I will give them this. They never shot any puppies.
We don’t hear about Vivek Ramaswamy and Tim Scott anymore. Both have some fatal weaknesses, but at least neither has shot any puppies.
Nikki Haley is definitely out of the running. As annoying as she is, she had something to offer the ticket. But she has broken her word about endorsing the GOP nominee, which was politically stupid. However, in her defense, that is not as politically stupid as admitting that she shot a puppy.
We’ll probably not learn Trump’s vice presidential pick for a couple of months. Trump is a little busy being framed by Soros/communist scumbags in garbage Democrat cities, but also he’s a consummate showman. He’s going to make this a big deal and wring every bit of suspense he can out of his decision. I defer to Donald Trump on public relations because if there’s one thing Trump knows how to do, it’s to get attention to get what he wants. And what he wants is a running mate who will help him nail down this increasingly winnable election. That starts with not picking someone who has shot a puppy.
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She’s another RINO. Don’t pick a female.
Best scenario: Trump wins but Biden steals it again, Trump is blocked in court and the US breaks up. Western Pennsylvania joins Ohio, Indiana, Southern Illinois, Kentucky and Tennessee in a new state with extremely limited government. Can anyone provide us with a route to the sea?
You already have one, the Great Lakes to the St. Lawrence seaway. Just travel on the Canadian side when passing upper New York state unless they too go with western PA.
If we could cordon off Madison/Milwaukee/Chicago/Gary then much of Wisconsin and the rest of “downstate” Illinois might tag along. We don’t want to abandon those folks.
While you/we are at it cordon off St. Louis and grab Missouri and Iowa. Cordon off the Twin Cities and get Minnesota in the bargain. Nebraska, Kansas, Oklahoma, and the Dakotas should be a snap. Get Arkansas, Mississippi, Alabama, and Louisiana and you get the Mississippi River and Gulf Ports.
All this talk/discussion/chatter/musings of Civil War 2.0 the past few years has been cast as red state vs blue state. The blue states get that way primarily from the dense urban population centers. In my opinion 2.0 will be urban versus rural with suburban areas ending up as DMZs. Producers versus consumers, makers versus takers.
Stop delivering food and fuel for a week or two, stop solid waste from being removed at the same time…the fun begins. (The week or two was an exaggeration. After a few days with food and fuel gone the cities will be toast).
But that creates an exfiltration problem similar to the current illegal immigration one. But that is beyond the scope of the access to the sea question.
Thanks for listening.
OD
PS. I’m not ignoring the other western states, I started going astray. I’m sure others would follow.
Woof Woof
Whats that Rover, Cricket ran away?
Woof Woof
Oh Kristi Noem put 2 in the back of Cricket’s head.
WTF how can anyone take anything serious anymore. Shit is beyond unbelievable. Somehow even stranger than Hollyweird.
There is not going to be an election this year. If there is, Biden will win. Then there won’t be anymore elections.
And here is the result.
No election in 2024? Why should there be? We certainly didn’t have one in 2020 either.
She’s a Zionist. Nuff said.
Zionist clown puppet and it has been obvious for years.
So is DeSantis
A puppy murderer would be the perfect choice based on his personality! They’d get along famously, because neither of them give a shit about anything but themselves.
You only murder HUMANS!…..words mean things!……
How do you downvote REALITY….only the pedantic try to make reality fit their ideals and redefine things……I scoff!…..
You might be onto something there but we are talking about puppies so there’s a lot of emotional baggage to deal with.
I scoff with you! Too close for comfort.
Most of the genus Homo is not human. Dogs are not human but some have more intrinsic value than the more obscure hominids
Murder is really only the hiding of a killing, and it shouldn’t encompass persons outside of your world.
How does one look at her and not see the crazy leaking out of every orifice?
Physiognomy……
Maybe too much firewater.
botox blocking the view?
don’t tell m
SHE’S A DYED IN THE WOOL ZIONIST!…..honestly,what more do you need to know?……She signed a bill outlawing criticism of Israhell in S.D…..Noahide Law(also known as communism)…..Noam for private citizen of singular citizenship(pick ONE) and SILENT!….
Oh btw……once a dog has killed a chicken he has the taste of blood in him now….he wont stop..
His ancient wolf DNA takes over…unless you can give him to a place where there are NO chickens(which is difficult in the rural areas)…sometimes there’s only one option…..but ,I guess that’s too much “nuance”for folks nowadays…..
This is why you dont feed dogs venison.
City and rural/farm dwellers have very different views of dogs especially working dogs, how they should be treated and their purpose. I am not a bit surprised by her story, but I understand many why many city living pet owners are upset by it.
You also have to consider the era. Yes most people get dogs from breeders now days, and they will take a bad dog back (and probably put it down too, it will not be bred). But back then dogs were just picked up from where ever. I worked in a small city (3000 people) supermarket in high school in 72-74. People dropping puppies of at the entrance in a box with a sign free puppies was common. Most never even came back to see if all the pups had been taken, but usually they were. Same for kittens. You can’t take that dog back to a breeder! You won’t see that today either.
Good point!…..strikes me as funny about the city dwellers acquisition of “pets”,when they get a bad one,they just outsource the dirty work to somebody else….typical and hypocritical
Depends on the dog, the breed, the master. Even depends on the chicken.
It’s not like a dog doesn’t know what meat and blood is. Some farm dogs have eaten one that died by other methods, though some won’t touch them.
I wonder if this is where the idea that once cannibals have tasted human flesh, they become raving maniacs or want to ‘feed’ again.
That dog kill’n chickens can’t be corrected is BS.
Had two dogs, a shepherd and a heeler when we had the farm, both killed a few chickens, both got cured of killing chickens and no I didn’t kill either dog.
Good on ya’…….
But you don’t talk about it around ignorant city folk, certainly don’t PUBLISH it.
Bingo! I know nothing Ms Noem’s tendency to kill little brown-eyed puppy-dogs, but for a politician to put out text describing her puppy-dog killing shows a lack of serious political ambition. Therefore, other things being equal, I’d support Ms Noem over some career political huckster out of Sioux Falls. Or anyone out of San Francisco.
That is complete bullshit. Any LGD trainer expects puppies to kill 1-3 chickens before you get them to understand not to. I lost 3 to two different Pyrenees pups, and now I completely trust them to protect my poultry.
The best method generally involves trying to beat them with the dead chicken just enough to convey the message. It goes without saying that plenty of close supervision is necessary at first.
Anyways, what is going on is not “wolf DNA” but various degrees of prey instincts that are highly dependent on breeds and breeding. I can feed my dogs a dead baby goat and know they are not going to start attacking my goats of any age. They mother the live babies shamelessly, but they are not going to leave stuff around to attract predators.
Herding dogs and hunting dogs are different. Hunting dogs in general have a much higher prey drive. Like asking a rat terrier to not hunt and kill rodents. Not happening.
I have never had terriers, it sounds good, but I haven’t really seen this.
They are bred hunters it is their instinct. They are tenacious hunters From the little one bred to hunt rodents to the big ones like Airdales used to hunt bears and the broad category pit bull terriers bred for hunting bears and boars.
I meant I have had hunting and herding dogs, and while different, both hunt equally hard when they’re not trained away from it. Never had a terrier
I thought pit bulls were bred to bite the faces off chilluns.
She could have had the dog humanely euthanized at the vet. It’s not like she can’t afford it. Shooting the dog and bragging about it is bizarre.
It was standard operating procedure where I grew up in the fifties and sixties. Vets were far away and expensive. Dogs were taken to the dump and shot regularly if sick or old. Society has changed greatly since then. Should we judge yesterday by today’s standards?
Hmm, pay a few hundred dollars for the death and disposal verse a $0.50 bullet cartridge.
I’m not a calculus teacher but I think she chose wisely.
Col Douglas Macgregor would be the only truly AMERICAN choice.
Don/Tulsi 2024
Well, she would get PETAs support. They supposedly kill peoples pets all the time. It must be true because I read it on the internet.
If you want to shake things up in the VP pick what about Senator John Kennedy! The Democrats would be shaking in the undies.
What’s worse, killing 1M+ with a fake vaccine or killing a puppy?
And don’t forget how many trillions of people Trump says he saves, let alone came up with a cancer cure.
Killing 5.6 billion.
You were off a few decimal points.
False equivalence moron.
If you really want to save the US realize some dogs with improper upbringing or intentional behavior problems can never be reformed and just need to be shot, period.
Just take a look at our immigration, welfare, criminal justice, and political systems for example.
Shot?? Give them free housing, a fully loaded Mastercard, free vet care, free food and a bitch in heat twice a week. then get them registered to vote.
I’m not an animal expert but I’m pretty sure dogs can sense when you hate them. That’s probably why the dog was “untrainable”.
Another good possibility and yes they do…as a service tech.I have met many dogs….dogs know dog people….
What’s interesting is they sense when somebody is up to no good….almost mind reading AND don’t need to be in the same room…….I pay attention to mine,even tho a husky is a lousy watch dog!…..
And you know she hates dogs how?
“I’m not an animal expert.”
But you play one on TV?
Desantis is dead as a candidate…I think forever…can’t unsee the ridiculous choreography, and the fact that people who actually worked with him in the House said he was personally awful.
Ben Carson, 100%…all good, no bad.
DeSantis was backed by Rove and the Bushes which is a kiss of death. He has done great things nonetheless.
Glad she is done. Tired of her. If Trump picks a demonrat like Tulsi it will be an extremely weak move and will prove that he did ask RFK Jr. to be his VP.
Or a SC Senator that took $67K in lobbyist money for his vote on Obama’s trans-pacific partnership.
Which one, the gay one or…Oh yeah, I forgot he’s ‘engaged’ now.
Engaged = Beard (rumors….)
If Trump loves America as much as he says he does, he should pick DeSantis as VP, and resign one day after inauguration.
Anyone who loves America hates the gummint.
Interesting scenario. A question, constitutionally would DeSantis be able to run for the office one more time or two?
In Israel or Florida?
If you loved white Americans, you would dehydrate and be a mummified corpsicle on Dune.
Well, we don’t want a president who made his young daughter blow him in the shower on one hand so slaughter of a young bird dog is hardly a lot not to want on the other, right? It’d be different if she was laying the humma on him at age sixteen or so… likewise if the dog was three or four??
I live rural and smoke everything that fux around
Does anyone not notice that she is telling the truth and being real in the face of criticism. I say that is ballsy
I’d rather someone give it to me straight rather then political it up with lies and fluff
the problem is her sanpuku eyes
Yeah, all these fuckers are acting like Democrats and going on FEELINGS instead of logic and common sense.
Some people are just bad and need to be put down, same as dogs.
I don’t like Noam for her policy. Has nothing to do with feelings.
If you think shooting a dog is the worst thing you ever heard of…well, when you think back on this moment in a year you’ll laugh your ass off at the memory.
I like Kristi Noem but she can’t be VP — Trump’d be grabbin’ her kitty and have her spread across his desk in the Oval office every other day.
I doubt it. Why would he when he has Melania?
Yes, Tim … You may be right. I was actually making a bit of an attempt at humor, if badly so, in alluding to Trump’s taped remarks — “When you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab ’em by the pussy. You can do anything.”
But now that I think on it a bit harder — and it has nothing to do with how I feel about Trump — a man with an attitude such as this could have the best wife in the world at home and still decide to stray, just because he could. Now whether or not Kristi would go along is an entirely different question.
What Trump said about women is pretty disgusting. Look, I like women as much as Trump does, but a real man would never do that to a woman.
I am not a Trump supporter and never have been. I have no political affiliation, and I do not vote. As a Christian I do not understand how so many so-called evangelicals in this country can support Trump.
Nothing is going to change for the better until Jesus Christ returns to this earth and puts down all rule and authority.
Why did God put Eve’s vagina so close to her anus? So Adam could carry her home like a six pack.
There used to be streets called GropeCunt. Real men don’t turn into cunts themselves when talking about women.
Who among us men haven’t engaged in some locker room talk/bragging? We just didn’t have anyone secretly recording us.
And I am not letting women off either I have overheard the ladies doing the same in the kitchen, having very explicit sexual conversations while the men are in the other room drinking and watching sports.
Thay was slick Willy, not Trump.
Vox Sentences: “When you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything.” —Donald Trump – Vox
Probably what he did with E. Jean Carroll, huh?
“The nominee can’t have shot any puppies.”
I suggest John Wick would be a good vice presidential candidate.
While I agree with you that she put a dog down bothers me not one bit, and I am a dog lover, all dogs.
And don’t pick someone who is untested. Promising they will do this or that is one thing, having shown they have done it, is quite another (as has DeSantis, and perhaos Huckabee, though she might need a little more time). I think the current House is a sterling example of having made that mistake.
I should clarify. I mean the DeSantis has accomplished the things he says he stands for.
I did not mean he says one thing and does another, as many politicians do.
“Trump’s VP Pick Should Be Someone Who Has Never Admitted to Shooting a Puppy”.
Well, count out Fauci.
I remember the day that I had to put our dog down because it became a cat-killing machine, and showed threatening behavior towards other people. It wasn’t an easy thing to do, but it was withhout hesitation that I shot it in the head. Another time a stray pitbull had killed a bunch of our chickens – boom – game over. Some people that have never been exposed to farm/ranch environments can be the most clueless, inexperienced, and arrogant fools imaginable.
There was nothing wrong with Christi Noem’s decision, as she was the only one that had to make that tough call – and a very gut-wrenching one at that. Calling a “dog” a “puppy” doesn’t make her actions unreasonable whatsoever. SAFETY FIRST
Right there with ya, brother. I am the protector of my wife’s chickens and have had to cap a few strays.
Why are people upset over this?
“The branch that is not producing shall be cut off”
Or pokemoned.
“They are Democrats, which disqualifies them from being Republican nominees”
“Nikki Haley is definitely out of the running. As annoying as she is, she had something to offer the ticket”
Some old joke about NOT being able to get Lab Rats to something?
Noem killed a puppy in exactly the same sense that George Zimmerman killed a sweet little choirboy named Travon Martin.
It was a dog.
Not a puppy.
A one and a half year old DOG that exhibited behavior that can not be tolerated on a farm.
It killed a bunch of chickens.
“Thou shall not kill”
The punishment for killing is death.
It is in the bible for christs sake.
That some people are falling for this as a means of discrediting the woman?
Shows how weak~minded some people are.
Yeah, but “puppies” sounds so much more cruel, dude. And this current political atmosphere deals more in feelings than logic and common sense. The better to sow division amongst people.
Dumbshit Kurt never livid on a farm and had a dog attack his fowl or livestock. I have had to kill a couple strays that attacked ours.
And notice how he says puppies in the lede, the says Cricket the dog in the story.
Way to go, Slick
KS, puppies don’t attack livestock, and just like people, some dogs are just vicious and need to be put down.
How many have had to put a dog down for biting or aggressive behavior that could not be controlled? Many people, they just pay a vet to do it.
Everyone’s panties bunched up over a dog story….fucking retards.
Many of them are angry they have to drive a couple hours now to kill their baby.