R.I.P. Penthouse Magazine.
“Effective immediately adult magazine Penthouse is to end its print edition after 50 years and go online-only. The closure of the print edition of the magazine, which was founded in 1965 by Bob Guccione, follows the announcement last year by Hugh Hefner’s rival Playboy that it will no longer feature naked women. FriendFinder Networks, the magazine’s parent company, said that subscribers to the print edition will be converted to digital.”
I bought Playboy … just for the great articles.
I bought Penthouse … just for the great cartoons. For example, here is a cartoon of Hillary Cuntham’s cat. Fricken hilarious,no?
This question is for Men Only. I am NOT going to ask if you watch porn from time to time. There are 6.81 trillion Doing-The-Nasty vids out there …. and they’re all FREE! I damn sure KNOW you watch porn! (Except Hardscrabble Farmer, who has a perfect life, and is very very happily married, and who sees much animal fornication on the farm … which will probably be his next blockbuster article.) So, let’s keep the question very simple.
The Question: Do you watch more than an hour of porn per month, or less?
Alternate Question For Religious Folks: Is porn a sin?
Everybody must be too busy jerking off to porn to answer the question.
[fap] [fap] [fap] what’s the question again? [fap] [fap]
Less. I’m no spring chicken and my drive is not what it used to be. On the days that it approaches what it used to be, I need only watch it for two, three minutes tops.
Define porn.
I’d have to be 90 to get by on just an an hour a month…
TBH, a couple times a week… I’m happily married, but kids really do get in the way of quality time with the wife, so a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do…
Helps keep the prostate clear and healthy….
Just an hour per month??????
Uh…………..sure………..less that that.
Pornography – translated from Greek: The Devil’s Pictures.
Sometimes it’s a good warm-up before getting in the sack with the wife. Especially if you’ve been married over 40 years.
i had a rooster once, the cock of the block, beautiful hamburg, a neighbor threw the easter chicken across the fence assuming all would go well. big rooster, beat to hell by hamburg, his will to live destroyed, he could not deal with being number two. what is greater, fear or sex drive, stucky surely you have an opinion?
Define Porn:
From cracked.com
“Porn” for the purposes of this study was defined as “any picture or video you suddenly lose interest in after masturbating.”
http://www.cracked.com/article_15725_the-10-steps-to-porn-addiction-where-are-you.htmlhttp://www.cracked.com/article_15725_the-10-steps-to-porn-addiction-where-are-you.html
@ fear & loathing:
I’ve got some backyard chickens. Even ended up with 2 roosters at the same time in my small flock of 12 birds.
And I have no idea what you’re saying.
Dutch, what does the wife look at before?
Ha! It’s been 35 years for me and my bride, sex is not as important as it used to be, quality over quantity I guess.
Why not watch together? Any porn to me is harmless titillation, it’s the young guys who believe porn is reality that get fucked in the head.
Does reading sex stories count? I don’t watch porn much at all as I like to read stories, every other day on average, probably……….
You evil ,sinful , wicked degenerate reprobates who will burn in the flames of hell for all eternity.
Stucky , shouldn’t you be on your knees asking the Lord Jesus Christ for help with selling your house instead of fantasizing about porn stars. Maybe God is punishing you for being a bad boy.Maybe this is the real reason you haven’t sold your house.Now turn and do repentance.
Stucky! Turn around, bend over, and prepare to receive thy repentance!!!
The Russian currency is crashing and going up in flames…….they will blame us. Who cares about Hitlery’s pussy? I HONESTLY fear for the shitstorm headed our way.
Stucky, Facebook has been invented already.
1) probably
2) generally
ain’t sayin nothin
1 hour per month aounds about right plus or minus 15 mins.
But that might have to do with ones nickname, the 60 sec assassin, lol!!!
You don’t know porn until you’ve toured a Thoroughbred breeding barn in Kentucky. My wife tossed around the idea of a lawsuit after that ‘shocking’ experience.
At my age everything seems like kiddie porn. Much guilt.
Just like Jesus would have wanted it.
Hmmm…nope.
The wife ( then girlfriend ) made me get rid of all of my pictures on the computer when we started living together . None of them were pornographic in nature . Almost all of the gals were completely clothed albeit in skimpy lingerie or bathing suits . I’ve always like pics that left something for the imagination
.I went to a the College of Charleston from 79-82…we had 6 girls to 1 guy so I have some great memories to think back on .
I have a really pretty wife so I don’t need anything to pump up the tire in order to ride the bike.
Stucky- Looks like this place is dripping with half-breeds from KY…….who knew?
(Mahtomedi is half injun)
BTW- That cartoon is a hoot.
Stucky…that cartoon reminds me of my step-dads favorite joke .
An ol’ gal wanted to spice up her waning sex life . She decided to consult the town’s #1 hootchie momma for advice .
The hootchie momma suggested crotch-less underwear as a sure fire turn on for her man.
She went out that day and bought a pair of black lace crotch-less panties . She put them on that afternoon when she got home and waited patiently on the couch for her husband to come home .
As he walked in through the door she raised her skirt,spread her legs and asked him if he like a little bit of what she was flashing ?
“Hell No ” was his reply ” That thang’ has eaten a hole in yer’ panties ” !
Stucky , your soul is in danger.
Whether a man ,as a civilized being , as a European , can believe at all ,believe that is , in the divinity of the Son of God ,Jesus Christ , for there rests ,strictly speaking , the whole faith …. Dostoyevsky.
Liberals in their rejection from Christ , have fled into the arms of the devil .He owns their body and soul.
All of past history was concerned with the struggle of races and classes. Race struggle is primarily , class struggle is secondary…. Moses Hess the true father of Marxism.
Porn is poison for your mind. Yes, it is sinful because Jesus expanded the commandments to include what goes on in your mind. “But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.” Matthew 5:28
Porn is very powerful and the reason it’s free is because the present “king” of this Earth wants no man obedient to Jesus. That’s why Jesus said “Enter in at the narrow gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leads to destruction, and many there be who go in there” Matthew 7:13
Haha. Some very funny answers here. It gives me great comfort to know I am not the only wanker ’round these parts. Thank yeeew.
Follow me Stucky . Now who controls the pornography business ? What tribe ?
Jewish media control means Jewish mind control .Right Stucky ?
Why do you think Jews would want you watching porn ? Satan , through pornography kills the image of God in man therefore indirectly killing Christian culture. What better to attack Christ then by attacking God’s way of reproducing God’s image of himself in man.Got that Stucky ? Now you can go Jack off.
Why watch porn when you can live it within the confines of a good marriage? The key is to never stop courting her.
“Stucky , shouldn’t you be on your knees asking the Lord Jesus Christ for help with selling your house instead of fantasizing about porn stars.” ————- bb
I went to Catholic school. You have no idea how many times I asked Jesus to forgive me after polishing the knob. No idea. Each and every time I would make a PROMISE (!!!) to God that I would NEVER-EVER do that nasty-thing again. I know you know what I’m talking about. Sometimes I would be so ridden with guilt that I would actually cry afterwards … for being so weak, and so dirty. Feeling guilt and shame … for many years …. over a naturally occurring biological function really fucked with my mind. So, kindly go fuck yourself (if you were serious about “repenting”).
And do the dishes now and then…
What is it with all the Jew bashing around here? Christ was a high priest, Torah observant, JEW. 6 million died in WW II. Israel controls 1/6 of 1% in the entire middle East. Yet they are the only free and thriving democracy there. Greatly outnumbered they kicked ass in every war since 1948. Yet they satanically control the world through porn? Get real. Maybe give the Jews a damn break.
OK Holy crap you people suck.
How is someone supposed to know about this thing called internet porn if everyone keeps it a secret. I have wasted countless retrieving half remembered fumbling encounters from my ever failing memory. I could have been building new memories with Katie the cum queen or any number of other internet sluts.
So much time wasted.
Fuck you!
There is something to be said about porn being free. You know the old saying… “nothing is ever free”. The same holds true here. Men have their free porn, women have their welfare. Sounds like a recipe for a societal collapse.
Being a realist, porn is probably ok if you are in a stable loving relationship and you need something to keep your eyes and your mind from wandering. But if you’re single, and do NOT want to be single, then you absolutely should not be watching porn. Of course, when every potential mate is either obese, knocked up and on welfare, or taking psychotropics, or just plain dumb as a rock, there is not much of an alternative.
Speaking of jerkoff wankers …..
I went grocery shopping for my parent this morning. First stop, Trader Joe’s. The place was absolutely PACKED to the gills …. 12 or so registers, each with 10+ people in line ….. shit flying off the shelves like Armageddon is arriving tomorrow, rather than a snow storm. People are such pussies.
Anyway, my mom asked me to buy some TJ’s Tomato & Roasted Pepper soup, which they greatly enjoy. Well, I buy more than they need on an IMMEDIATE basis. Neither drives anymore, so I buy enough for them to stock their pantry. So, I bought 10 boxes …. again, it had nothing to do with the snowstorm coming.
Well, there were not many boxes left …. maybe 20-30 boxes, shit was flying off the shelves, and I just took 10. Soooooooo, some fucking 40ish skinny yuppie-ish dweeb (we have a lot of those here in Westfield) with a manicured beard taps me on the shoulder, and says — “Why don’t you leave some for other people and stop hoarding?”. This was a mistake on his part.
I say, pretty much verbatim here — “Why don’t you go fuck a duck, asshole! This is for my elderly parents who don’t drive and their pantry needs to be restocked.”
“Oh well, I’m sorry but you really didn’t need to swear. You could have been nice about it.”
“No I couldn’t. First, you should mind your own fuckin’ business as to who buys what. Second, don’t go touching people you don’t know. You’re lucky I didn’t break your fuckin fingers. Last, don’t say another goddamned word to me!”. He didn’t …. although I don’t know what I would have done had he said something. What am I gonna do? Fight someone on the middle of TJ’s? I don’t think so.
So, when I get home I told Ms Freud about the little asshole I ran into at TJ’s. He probably went home and told HIS wife about the big asshole he ran into at TJ’s. I just love ‘Murika.
BTW, go long on the Groceries500 S&P …
Personally, I would rather appreciate the inter beauty of a woman as opposed to watching a bunch of sweaty, carnal animals onscreen. But hey! To each his own.
Addicted to Doom Porn now 24/7
Porn, less than an hour a month…..
Anyways I divide world into two camps.
Those who are masters of their domain….
and
Those who lie about the masters of their domain.
Sorry Stucky, as a married man, I have no need for it. 🙂
Admin
How long did you search the Internet so you could put penis and doodle in the same sentence?
Given all the Christian references on this thread, I admire how Stucky takes care of his parents. Love them now because they don’t last forever. Nothing more noble then honoring your father and mother. And, “love covers over a multitude of sins.” That’s what I hold on to. Nothing else matters. IMO.
Why does Stucky always want to know about TBP’s jerk off habit? Did anybody order any dildos through Amazon this year? I don’t recall seeing Admin post a list this year?
Stephanie
I have an insatiable lust for knowledge. Why don’t you tell us about your habits?
Jimski
Admin writes little love notes on his weenie ….. a couple words, tops, is all that fits. He was looking for something new to write.
“Sorry Stucky, as a married man, I have no need for it.” ———- Back in Mike
Behold, the first liar in this thread.
YUP!
🙂
In Row #2
Mike from Canmore peut-etre
@Stucky:Seems you’ve riled BB up with your question. May I suggest a follow-up?
“Did Jesus masturbate?”
Stephanie – I thought Stucky very clearly laid down the law regarding only men on this post. Welcome to the party. I respect your “balls”. U R hot. If Dutchman, or anyone else, disrespects you – I will be watching and will kick ass with a smile on my face. You go…, girl.
Video porn? I never figured that sex was a spectator sport. However, I occasionally find an entertaining, well-written and clever story–albeit rarely.
I did once take brief note of some real-life porn. Behind a building at Luckenbach, during one of Hondo’s World’s Fairs. A couple was in the throes of passionate horizontal recreation. I had to laugh to myself, though, thinking of their next day: They were in tall Bermuda grass, which was loaded with chiggers.
Weigh in. Us dudes should know what you really think. We can handle it, I think…
Desertrat – don’t say “chiggers”. That is racist.