Took this picture yesterday at Wegman’s. Is there no end to the pussification of America that now clams are considered dangerous?
Question of the Day, Apr 18
Took this picture yesterday at Wegman’s. Is there no end to the pussification of America that now clams are considered dangerous?
Clams are incredibly dangerous, and addictive.
When I first found voodoo I was in my 20’s
I was workin’ at a club and tryin’ to be funny
Met a sweet girl named Ilene she had the nicest legs I’d ever seen
We had a few laughs and a few white russians
laughs turned into feelin’ and touchin’
We started to kiss and she said I think your nice let me take you back to my place and ruin your life
It was voodoo
I thought Ilene was just bein’ playful but that’s before she licked my naval
I was tryin’ to think of somethin’ cool to say when she ripped off her lingerie
She climbed on top and I lost my breath
and when she squeezed it tight she nearly scared me to death
Just one night with her changed my world
Ilene was no ordinary average girl
she had ultra hot fox mammy jammy
nuclear hot powered voodoo punanny
And to this day when I’m alone with vasoline
you can bet I’m thinkin’ about Ilene
Voodoo … punanny got the voodoo .. doesn’t matter what you do
you can’t resist the power it holds
so listen very closely to the story I’ve told
It’s the reason women drink free martinis
the reason old men buy lamborghinis
There was a girl named Lola and a guy named Sam
He fancied him self an ambitious man
Straight to the top was where Sam was destined
But that was before he saw Lola’s breast
and touched her thigh her skin was creamy
kissed her lips so moist and dreamy
Took off their clothes and started to do the act
and Sam nearly had him self a heart attack
you see Lola’s voodoo’s extra strong they fornicated all night long
When mornin’ came he called the office
think I’ve found a better offer
You can keep the job he said ” I resign and I’ll take Lola from behind”
now Sam works all day pumpin’ gas day dreamin’ of lovely Lola’s ass
He gets off at five every night and ?? ??? till day light
Voodoo … punanny got the voodoo…doesn’t matter what you do
you can’t resist the power it holds
so listen very carefully to the story I’ve told
Punanny got magic punanny got power
It’s the only reason men buy flowers
Did ya ever meet man with a bitchy wife ?
wonder why the guy wanna ruin his life
By bein’ married to a woman that’s mean to him
Well I’m gonna tell you somethin’ so listen kid
When the lights go down and the candles flame
i bet that woman doesn’t act the same
I bet you what she got is really sweet
Bet you that girl is packin’ heat
When he gets her alone whips out his bannana
She gives him a dose of the voodoo punanna
you ain’t gonna forget it You can’t ignore it
no matter where you look there ain’t no cure for it
don’t waste your time tryin’ to run and hide
voodoo haunts you every night
Voodoo
Daddy I’m scared
you should be son it’s good to fear
Cause if it wasn’t for voodoo you wouldn’t be here
I never wanted kids
but that was your mamma’s idea
She tricked me with voodoo
Everyone knows the most dangerous clams have beards….
Maybe kids were using them as hockey pucks?
Some clams will rip you a new asshole and smile all day about it. I think they’re called Stephanie Clams.
TPC,
Best poem ever. Thanks for sharing.
Bob.
I love little necks, oysters too. The trick is knowing how to open them. I’m talking shellfish here you perverts.
Bob.
The best way to clams to open is with a hot tub and a bottle of wine.
No chowder for you, cause clams have feelings too
Actually they don’t have central nervousness
TPC
Thanks for the poem, it brings back memories. At my age, lots of memories.
Oops, forgot to credit that, its a comedy song, by Joe Rogan.
Judging my the numbers of pants shitters and ass crack diggers in the weekly PoWM posts, would you as a proprietor of a seafood store or department want people handling the merchandise?
When I purchase anything from a deli, seafood market etc, I try to observe the food handling practices happening at the time before deciding whether to purchase or move on. If they are not wearing gloves I’m out and if they are handling anything other than my order *with* gloves I’m out too.
IS, I wouldn’t mind, the “For Your Safety” got me.
I prefer my clams shaved .
@IS
indeed, “keep your filthy hands off the clams”
but “safety” is so PC
I assumed they were talking about food safety because I can’t understand how (that kind of) a clam could hurt anybody. Even sea otters give clams what for with a rock!
Clams got scruples
BC comics
early 70s.
classic.
They are worried about seafood allergies, actually they are scared to death of lawsuits. I actually can’t believe they settled for a sign. That won’t last long. I mean, what if the allergic person is illiterate? We can’t discriminate against illiterate seafood allergy people. That’s racist.
Yes, a sign won’t do. In many restaurants now when an allergy order comes in, only a manager can handle the food from start to finish, with fresh gloves, and the plate is served under a cover and paperwork must be filled out by the manager. No personal responsibility for the allergic party who chooses to order what could be a life-or-death meal at a restaurant where the bulk of the workers are flunkees making $2.15 an hour. That would be racist too.
VietVet says:
“Clams got scruples”
I’m pretty sure that’s a line from the old BC comic strip. I can’t recall the context but I may have cut that out and hung it up someplace.
Yep, from “B.C.”. For some reason that line has stuck with me for decades!