Russian to Judgement

Guest Post by Stilton Jarlsberg

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, russia, hacking, investigation, asshole, hillary, election

Barack Obama has ordered a “full review” of cyber-chicanery associated with the 2016 elections, under the belief that Russia may have tampered with our sacred voting process by somehow having created a 30 year history of corruption by Hillary Clinton and everyone she’s ever been in contact with.

Where do we even begin? The CIA – no doubt under orders and perhaps the threat of waterboarding – has issued a strong but factually vague statement that people who may have connections to people who may be Russian may have provided Wikileaks with vast amounts of hacked information about Hillary’s decades-long history of sleazy deals and ineptitude, which may have influenced the election because (unlike most information given to voters) it was all true.

The accusations would be more plausible if the CIA, FBI, and DOJ weren’t so thoroughly compromised by their own political cover-ups and scandals at this point. As their main mission is now the protection of undeserving Democratic asses, we’re not exactly impressed with anything they’re saying now.

And just how “meta” is the accusation that Russia tried to corrupt our election process by releasing proof (and plenty of it) that Hillary and the DNC had already corrupted the election process? Who’s the actual criminal here, and who’s simply a witness?

Hope n’ Change actually thinks it pretty unlikely that Russia had anything to do with the release of damning information about Hillary and her cohorts in crime. After all, if they had hacked all this dirt (not to mention every Top Secret hosted on her email server) wouldn’t they want Hillary to win so that they’d own an American President because of all the blackmail potential?

That’s why we think it far more likely that the source of the hacked material was an individual patriot from the Democratic party or a domestic intelligence agency who saw this as the only way to save America from a corrupt, shrieking, money-grubbing, two-faced, brain-damaged harpy with a gift for screwing up every policy issue she’s ever touched.

Obama’s highly publicized demand for a report on computer espionage is supposed to be rushed to his Oval Office desk (no doubt to be left between his fingernail clippings and scuff marks from the heels of his shoes), but the results may never be made public. Which is hardly surprising, considering that the actual purpose of Obama’s call for an investigation is simply to delegitimize the upcoming Presidency of Donald Trump.

In other words, a hostile government really is trying to subvert the will of American voters. It just happens to be the government currently in Washington.

 

Subscribe
Notify of
guest
14 Comments
Anonymous
Anonymous
December 12, 2016 9:59 am

If there is any actual hard, verifiable, evidence it should be presented.

But I doubt there is, conspiracy theories rarely have any and I see this one as no different than the others.

Jason Calley
Jason Calley
December 12, 2016 10:13 am

If it were to be definitively proven that the Russians had hacked information which led to Hillary losing the election, I for one, would be willing to give them most favored trading status and present a Medal of Honor to Putin.

hardscrabble farmer
hardscrabble farmer
December 12, 2016 10:42 am

Let me try and break this down for everyone in a way that’s easy to understand.

If you see evidence of criminality being done by those in power, that’s a conspiracy theory. If you write about it presenting the facts in detail, that’s fake news.

If people in power lose legitimately, it’s because of a conspiracy.

If they write about it without presenting any evidence, that’s real news.

I hope this helps.

Suzanna
Suzanna
December 12, 2016 10:46 am

“In other words, a hostile government really is trying to subvert the will of American voters. It just happens to be the government currently in Washington.”

O just keeps throwing shite against the wall and hopes some of it sticks.
“Hope n’ Change” is such an excellent post. We love it.

Imagine if we had Hill? The hubris and corruption would have sickened
even the corrupt. And she, et al, would have killed some folks.

Rise Up
Rise Up
  Administrator
December 12, 2016 3:07 pm

“We further require a briefing on all investigative findings, as these matters directly impact the core factors in our deliberations of whether Mr. Trump is fit to serve as President of the United States.”
————-
Fat chance…

prusmc
prusmc
  Administrator
December 12, 2016 3:21 pm

First time in memory Mitch ( Mush) McConnel took an unequivocal stand. Expect Song bird McCain and Lady Graham to switch from Republican to Democrat soon.

Jason Calley
Jason Calley
  prusmc
December 12, 2016 3:45 pm

They switched to Democrat years ago, they just never admitted it.

Cartersville Critter
Cartersville Critter
December 12, 2016 11:26 am

Once again the great Glenn Greenwald tacks their asses to the wall:

Anonymous Leaks to the WashPost About the CIA’s Russia Beliefs Are No Substitute for Evidence

Anonymous
Anonymous
December 12, 2016 12:01 pm

Someone tell Barry Soetro Regie Love is on the lawn waiting and quickly change the locks to the white house. Give Obama a fly swatter .

unit472
unit472
December 12, 2016 12:37 pm

Were the Democrats concerned about Russ, er, Soviet agents and front groups during the Cold War? No! They approved of Soviet ‘disinformation’ back then because it targeted Republicans and the few Democrat “hawks’ like Scoop Jackson or Sam Nunn.

This whole ‘Russia influenced the election’ is an ex post facto scheme. Did Hillary bring it up during the debates or in her speeches? No! Did our melanin enriched president request a report on Russian ‘meddling’ before the election? S No! Surely the CIA was aware Podesta’s emails were being published in US newspapers. Why didn’t they track down the source when they first began to appear?

The answer to the question is ‘the polls’. Obama, The Rodhamster and the CIA all assumed Clinton would win. She didn’t so there must have been foul play.

The question I have is, why do we need the CIA at all. It has more personel than ISIS and Al Qaeda combined. We could have a CIA employee ‘tail’ every Muslim terrorist in the world and it would be a helluva lot more effective than having tens of thousands of CIA staff driving to their offices in Northern Virginia everyday!

Rise Up
Rise Up
  unit472
December 12, 2016 3:11 pm

Good points, unit472. The Dems thought they were so smart, but there was no “Plan B”. If trying to blame the Russians at this point IS their Plan B, it’s failing miserably.

james the deplorable wanderer
james the deplorable wanderer
December 12, 2016 2:30 pm

When I was in 9th grade, Lamar Alexander (I’m not a fan, really, but listen) was elected Governor of Tennessee. This was largely due to the scandals created by his predecessor, Ray Blanton. Blanton’s laundry list of misbehaviors was huge; after forty years I can still remember
Selling state surplus vehicles (think retiring State Trooper police cars, panel vans from state agencies, etc.) to his brother to re-sell at a profit;
Selling pardons and paroles to well-connected and well-heeled convicts;
Hiring the Humphreys County Democratic party chair’s brother, another convict, as a state photographer;
Misdeeds with the state prison system (they made a movie about that one), which Wikipedia describes as follows:
[In 1977, Blanton fired Marie Ragghianti, chairwoman of the state’s Board of Pardons and Paroles, when she refused to release prisoners who, as was later determined, had bribed state officials in exchange for obtaining pardons (Ragghianti later sued and won a $38,000 judgment against the state). On December 15, 1978, the FBI raided the state capitol, and seized documents from the office of Blanton’s legal advisor, T. Edward Sisk. Sisk and two others were arrested, and Blanton appeared before a federal grand jury on December 23, where he denied any wrongdoing. A portion of the story of the pardons scandal was made into a book, Marie: A True Story, by Peter Maas, author of Serpico, and eventually made into the motion picture, Marie (1985), starring Sissy Spacek in the title role of Marie Ragghianti.]
Anyway, Blanton was threatening to release every prisoner on Death Row for some reason, and Lamar Alexander was sworn in three days early to get him out of office. I marched with my junior high school band in Alexander’s Inauguration parade.
Why can’t we swear in Trump in December after the Electoral College vote, and keep Obama from doing any more damage on his way out? It worked in Tennessee!