After my normal 1 hour and 15 minute commute home from work last night, I had to stop for gas. I pulled up to the pump, swiped my credit card and started to fill up my tank.
A car pulled in behind me at the next pump. As I was minding my own business, freezing my ass off, a female voice said “excuse me”. It was a twenty something girl trying to get my attention. I turned around and she proceeded to tell me she was from New Jersey and didn’t know how to put gas in her car.
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New Jersey might be the last state in the country where an attendant is required to pump your gas. This young lady had gone her entire life without having to put gas in her car. She didn’t even know how to unscrew her gas cap.
After unscrewing her gas cap, I had to show her how to swipe her credit card to activate the pump. I’m sure she’s good at using a credit card. Millennials do know how to spend money they don’t have. She was really impressed when I selected regular, inserted the nozzle in her tank and put the pump on automatic. She probably should have taken notes, in case this desperate situation should ever occur again. She thanked me and I resumed pumping my own gas and drove the rest of the way home.
As I drove I found myself flabbergasted by the fact that anyone could reach their early 20’s without knowing how to put gas in their car. Our society is filled with helpless waifs and metrosexuals who can’t do anything for themselves. They think they are owed a living. Hard work is out of the question. These social justice warrior types believe society owes them a living wage and government should provide them healthcare, food and housing.
When this Potemkin Village economy implodes in the next few years and civil chaos breaks out across the urban ghettos and suburban enclaves, these special snowflakes will be the first casualties. Figuring out how to put gas in their cars will be the least of their worries.
In New Jersey, it is against the law to pump your own gas.
I said that in the post.
Know why NJ is called the “Garden State”? Because the “Crotch of the Universe” doesn’t fit on a license plate.
I think she just liked you,
and wanted you to be her sugar daddy.
Exactly what I was going to say; she was flirting. Had to be it – I refuse to believe that some people don’t know how to pump gas.
I was going to say “Quinn, you fucking knob – she wanted you!” I guess we all think the same way. The mere mention of a helpless lass talking to a middle-aged man sets off delusional fantasies.
Her small talk consisted of:
1. Your good with a hose
2. You found the hole fast
3. You always put it in all the way?
She was fat and disheveled.
Many of us who have grown up in New Jersey have worked after school and during week-ends in gas stations, meaning that we’ve gotten paid to put gas in automotive vehicles’ fuel tanks.
No problem when driving in the Keystone State.
I refuse to get gas in NJ since they will not allow me to do it myself and then expect to heavily tip the probably illegal “attendant.” I did not know about that tip thing the first time I did it, and got a nasty remark in exchange.
In New Jersey, it’s illegal for a gas station to dispense gasoline. You got that, putzi?
As a customer, I’ve filled up gas tanks in privately owned vehicles I’d been driving in the Garden State, but only while I’d had attendants immediately present (almost always nattering with the guys) when I’ve been familiar with the proprietors despite the fact that we all knew that we were violating Trenton’s bloody stupid law.
One thing, though. Despite having worked as gas station attendant during my teenage years growing up in New Jersey, I’d never received a tip from any of the stations’ customer. Nor have I ever tipped such a station’s attendants anywhere.
Has that ever been the custom in any venue? Really?
TeaTea, your a dumbass, how could you not know about the ‘vig’ in Jersey?
First time I ever crossed into NJ, I stopped on the GSPway at the first gas station I saw. When this butch Goth-a-potamus chick came out to pump my gas, I thought I had discovered the last Full Service 50s-style gas station in America. Despite the fact the sullen skater chick didn’t have a white uniform, peaked cap, and a smile didn’t deter my enthusiasm for this last piece of old Americana, and I tipped her 5 bucks for the service. She stared at me like I was a lunatic. Shortly afterwards, while visiting my buddy who lived in Newark, I learned about NJ’s peculiar rules. And jug handles. Those suck, too.
A tip in NJ – Put $2.00 to win on the number 2 horse in the second race at Monmouth.
Should’ve told her you didn’t have a BS in Gas Pumping so it would be illegal for you to show her.
Seriously? Gas stations still have employees outside the little glass “pay here” box? I thought ‘full service’ gas stations ended that practice in the 70’s.
Go to NJ or Oregon (I think.) They have paid attendants who you have to tip like waiters. But don’t expect them to check your oil or fill your tires.
Yes PatrioTea,
Oregon also has a law that only allows the attendants to pump gas.
When I have the misfortune of needing to fuel-up in Oregon, I get out of my vehicle and start pumping my own gas, just as I would in Washington. That gets the Petroleum Distribution Technician out to my car in a big hurry! It’s not me, but rather the gas station that faces trouble if my “violation” is detected by Big Brother.
Been in Jersey for 67 years buying gas, NEVER ONCE TIPPED or tried to tip an attendant. My son’s first job was as an attendant while at college for a few years. Atendants receive a decent wage and NO TIPPING is the norm.
These are the kinds of stories you hear about, where for the first 1/2 to 3/4 of it, you think you’re being set up for a joke. You’re practically leaning into it, waiting for the punchline…
Then you realize the punchline is that people in stories like this manage to stay alive on a daily basis.
On another note, is that a law about the gas attendants in NJ or what? I’ve never heard that before.
It is the law. Individuals can’t pump their own gas.
Wow. Never heard of such a thing.
This is an example of government corruption. Obviously, people in the other 48 states (you can’t pump your own gas in Oregon either) pump their own gas everyday. Nobody is dying, gas stations aren’t going up in flames. However, the Democrats have been bought and paid for by either the union or another special interest group.
I lived in Oregon for five years in the late 70’s, and rode motorcycles. When I needed gas for my bikes, I went to the station with a gas container because I never trusted the gas attendants to not spill gas on my Suzuki GS750 (the dirt bikes, either!).
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Is it fully fair to criticize someone for not knowing how to do something they have been deliberately kept from knowing how to do?
Yes it is fair. You have to be a total dumbass to reach your twenties without learing how to pump gas. You must be the helicopter parent of a special snowflake.
You attack me instead of showing why it is fully fair to criticize someone who has been prevented from learning something for not knowing it.
How many things do you know that you have been prevented from learning?
I’ll attack anyone I choose to attack. If you make a dumbass comment, I’ll call you a dumbass. NJ is bordered by NY, PA, and Del. How secluded is the little snowflake that she hasn’t ventured beyond the borders of NJ and needed to get gas?
Nobody fucking prevented her from learning how to uncsrew her fucking gas cap. Does she have a fucking father who could have showed her? Your warped thought process tells me everything I need to know about you. Dumbass
“NJ is bordered by NY, PA, Del and CT.” NJ is not bordered by CT. Can I call you a dumbass?
Whatever do you mean? My comment doesn’t reference CT. 🙂
It’s good to be Admin.
Yuk yuk yuk.
You are at the same moral and ethical level as Mrs. Clinton.
And with bigger tits.
No it doesn’t.
Your warped thinking does tell me everything I need to know about you, though.
Maybe the special snowflake could have watched the attendant put the gas in her car one of the hundreds of times it has been done for her in order to learn how to do it, you jackoff.
These brain dead anonymous commenters really are bringing the site down.
I have to agree with Anonymous on this one. If I didn’t have to learn to pump gas, I wouldn’t have. Of course, the majority of women generally aren’t interested in anything about cars, except how to get from A to B. That’s how I used to be.
But I’m sure if she had to get gas and there were no gas attendants, she could always ask a guy to do it for her, and he would. Hint, hint, 🙂
Just cuz’ she can’t manage an overly complex gas cap system or operate a super computer gas pump OS doesn’t means she’s isn’t a strong independent women ready to take on the world and the evil white patriarchy.
If she is old enough to have sex she is knowledgeable of the principle that the hose goes in the hole. Capice?
I am an engineer, and have real problems with the whole concept of “deliberately kept from knowing how to do”.
What aspects of “knowledge control” do you approve of? I can barely tolerate “national security” in the form of “troop movements, naval maneuvers and air operations”, since idiots and fraudsters have used it to hide knowledge of how incompetent they are / how badly they fucked up somewhere (everywhere). I can barely tolerate it for “personnel matters”, since it may be important that I know that a co-worker has multiple past confinements for violent mental illness. HOW IN THE HELL can you justify it for this?
I’ll bet the girl knows how to use her $500 iPhoney and YouTube to look up an instructional how-to video on pumping gas.
Can not pump your own gas in Oregon as well. They have started allowing it in very rural areas of Eastern Oregon.
Yupper, The People’s Republic of Oregon! I roll up and start pumping my own. Have had many arguments with the gas gimps who don’t understand Diesel is not a class 1 flammable liquid covered by the law. Then again who actually reads laws nowadays?!
https://www.oregonlaws.org/ors/480.310
When my daughter, who is now 19 and in college on a scholarship, was 17, she and I changed the timing belt on her 2004 Tundra. Before she left for college and turned the truck over to her little brother, she changed the oil and oil filter. She also helped me finish out a room in the attic which is now his room, including hanging drywall, pounding finish nails and running wires. She can out-shoot me by a mile on the skeet range (of course my 12 gauge is a fixed full choke, but still) and she can catch fish with the best of them.
She has a friend who’s a spoiled, rotten kid who’s on his third brand new car from Daddy. I doubt he knows how to pop the latch for the hood. Many of her friends are the same way, completely helpless. I don’t get it.
Is she a lesbian?
I doubt she’s even been to Beirut.
That’s funny right there
No, just a girl with a good head on her shoulders and a good eye with a gun. She’ll take out faggots like you when the shit hits the fan.
Good one.
Wish my dad had been around to teach me things like that. My parents divorced when I was young and I didn’t see my dad much. I was a tom boy when I was young and would have taken to it readily. But as I grew older and became a young woman, as they say, lost all interest in things like that.
Worked in a print shop long ago with a young lady who couldn’t tell time on an old fashioned clock. I tried to explain how it worked, the big hands and little hands, but she had no interest in learning either.
A few years ago I helped a woman in a similar way. She was an elderly woman and her late husband had always pumped the gas. My grandmother never even learned to drive so when my grandfather died she was stuck begging rides from friends and neighbors. Seeing this makes me feel like we’ve gone one step forward, two steps back.
Any ideas how much cost is added for the privilege of having your gas pumped for you?
I run into these Jerseyites from time to time on the pow wow trail in MD and PA, mostly, but sometimes in VA. People who live there and seldom drive out of state don’t know that you pump your own fuel outside their state.
It’s comical the first few times you encounter it, but after a while it’s just another one of those things, like New Yorkers getting all excited about buying fireworks at South of the Border on 95. I like telling them that livermush is just scrapple by another name. It ain’t but it’s funny to see them take a bite for the first time.
Where the hell do people call scrapple “livermush”? My family used to run a country school in which we operated a butcher shop. We made scrapple (also sausage), and as far as I ever saw, there weren’t never no liver in the mix.
Durrrp …
Nuts. Not “school” but “country store” (groceries and notions).
It’s a Carolina thang, Tooch. It’s dark brown and spicy, made with liver, broth and cornmeal. Scrapple is a different taste altogether. Both are pork pudding, though.
Thanks. I grew up in South Jersey (and matriculated through my baccalaureate degree in Philadelphia), meaning that my experience with scrapple (which is marketed all over in the Delaware Valley in grocery stores and appears ubiquitously on restaurant menus here) was unremarked until I got into grad school in the Midwest. Around Philly, you can elect fried scrapple instead of bacon, breakfast sausage, or ham – and, homesick, I’d asked for scrapple one morning in a diner in Kansas City with a waitress who’d never even encountered the term.
That had been half a century ago. Do such regional peculiarities persist, I wonder?
Apparently they persist in some regions. Rapa scrapple is available in Maryland and Virginia, but I’ve never seen livermush for sale anywhere outside the Carolinas. It’s a Carolina thang, exclusively I suppose.
I live in South Carolina and have never heard of livermush. Heard of scrapple though. Heard it sucks.
Habersett Scrapple fried up real nice with eggs is awesome. I buy it all the time.
You won’t find scrapple in Kentucky. At least not anywhere close to me. I didn’t even know what scrapple is until now.
That’s exactly why I agree with Anonymous on this, you don’t learn what you don’t know about or not allowed to do.
I can understand people not leaving their state. I don’t leave mine much unless I’m going on a vacation, which, unfortunately, I can’t do often. When I was younger, yeah. But not now that I’m older and have too many responsibilities.
Seems to be an international problem.
[img]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_Ov200cYnY[/img]
Maybe they can get some illegal aliens (slaves) to do it for them.
rectumxl takes up the mantle, Cali jokes move on to illegal jokes.
… then donkey show jokes.
@Not Sure
http://blog.oregonlive.com/commuting/2012/02/why_cant_oregonians_pump_their.html
My wife is a waitress. The millennial waitresses ask her whether the tip they got was a good one, because they can’t calculate 20% of the total bill in their heads.
I’ve worked as a waitress in the past and witnessed this myself and it’s sad.
When I was in high school, I worked part-time at McDonald’s. I worked the drive-in alone on Friday and Saturday nights, the busiest times. And that was before there were digital cash registers. We had cash registers but you were only allowed to ring up the total and put the money in. There was a dry-erase board overhead where you had to mark what was ordered, put down the prices (and you had to have the prices for everything on the menu memorized), and then you had to add everything, add tax, all on the dry-erase board. Then you had to get the order together, take the money, ring up the total, put the money in the register. Then you took the next order or two and did the same thing over and over. And the line was around the block and it was non-stop because there weren’t a lot of fast-food joints in town then. These kids today have it made. The ones taking the order and the money usually don’t even put the orders together now.
Later, I took a second job, part-time, as a Waffle House waitress to earn extra money. And one thing that used to piss me off that happened only a few times, but was extremely irritating, was when someone came to the register to pay and they handed you extra money, and when you told the person they paid too much, they would give that “I’m so much smarter than you” look and say, I gave you that money because I want dollar bills instead of change, or something like that, with a look that says “You’re an idiot.” Well, first of all, I’m not a mind reader, and you didn’t say that’s what you wanted, so I assumed right away you just made a mistake. Second of all, I’m busy as hell, got fifty things on my mind and I’ve got fifty things I have to do, and I’ve got tables of customers to serve, dishes to wash and tables to clean, and you’re playing damn games just to make yourself look superior. Look, I’m not an idiot but I’m busy and have too much going on to play games.
So for anyone on this website, if you do this, I hope you realize your an ass. Explain what you want and don’t act like you’re superior. We’re not all idiots, just busy as hell. Make your wishes known and there’s no problem. Otherwise, I assume you can’t count money and overpay every time. You have to remember, restaurants, unless they’re high end, get all kinds of people. Some can’t count money, believe it or not. I’ve worked at several restaurants, and I have run across this more than you would think, sadly. So don’t assume we’re idiots.
Isn’t the picture fake? On all the new gasoline pumps I have used the fune hood has to be compressed before the pump will start.
New or old pumps, I see very few of those “fume hoods” (in Texas) and if I do, I move on to another station….I hate those things.
Dumb Millennial should have fueled up in New Jersey before venturing west of the Delaware river.
Gasoline is cheaper in Jersey than in PA. Roughly $.25/gal. less.
No worries, Gov Wolf will take in all he can to ” improve the roads and bridges”.
I once helped a woman determine from her gas gauge if there was still gas in her tank. The woman in question was the widow of a very famous entrepreneur (think hamburgers). She was probably worth in the hundreds of millions. Somehow that made it seem a little more normal.
Driving through jersey one time probably 15 years ago we stopped at a quiet gas station for gas. I don’t have a lot of tolerance for unnecessary bullshit delays, so after about 30-45 seconds of not seeing any attempt at getting us gassed up, I stepped out and started to pump my own gas. Well that finally got the attendant off his ass, and boy was he pissed! I thought he was going to start a fight over it.
Count me among the naive/dumbass. I just found out that some cars don’t have a dipstick to check the engine oil. I guess the car gives you a warning if the oil level gets too low and also tells you(like most do) when to change the oil. However, I DO know how to put gas in my Jeep, guess I’m not a total loss!
I hate the fact that things are becoming so computerized.
I can check my oil and put oil in. My ex-husband taught me how to do that, and also check and put in clutch oil, change wiper blades, add washer fluid, brake fluid, etc. He tried to teach me to change a tire but I didn’t have the strength to loosen the lug nuts, even though I worked out and did aerobics all the time. That’s because, I guess, women don’t have the upper-body strength of men. But he had no problem loosening them.
And I’ve learned quite a few things since I’ve been divorced due to necessity. I can change a headlamp, jump-start cars, and even more things now.
I bet she knows how to post a pic to FaceBook or text and talk on her smart-phone, without which she absolutely can’t function. Boy, her parents did a bang up job with this one, didn’t they (and that’s not a question). Even living in New Joisey isn’t a good enough excuse to be so…culturally illiterate.
Never heard of a car without an engine oil dipstick. Not saying in this goofy computer age it can’t be true, but seems very odd. Are you sure you’re not referring to a transmission oil dipstick? Many newer cars now have sealed trannies that don’t use dipsticks.
You had me right up to the last line…
Everybody kniws trannies have dipsticks!
zing!
Many BMWs no longer use a dipstick.
Ironically BMW has been catching a lot of flack for excess oil consumption between changes. Many class action lawsuits and the like. Articles an consumer reports as well.
Some are known to use 1qt every 500 mi or so.
Not just $2 oil either, but $10 per qt BMW spec synthetic
A fellow I know is an avid outdoorsman and in addition to hunting and fishing, he teaches cross country skiing to 9 to 11 year-old kids. He’s getting fed up teaching because the kids’ parents get angry when he sends a note home to a kid’s parents to please teach them how to tie their own shoe-laces because he’s wasting valuable class time tying their shoe-laces for them. I wonder if anyone will show them how to pump their own gas when the time comes?
Some parents don’t do these things themselves.
When my son was in middle school, one of his teachers (male) decided to teach a class on being a man. Yes, that’s right. My son wanted to take the class so I told him I thought it was a good idea. (He was in 7th grade). Although his own dad had taught the majority of things the teacher taught, the teacher did teach the students how to tie a tie, change a car tire, some manners, and a few things like that. Too bad more teachers don’t do that, especially when the parents won’t or don’t know how.
Thank goodness there wasn’t anything in the class that he didn’t already know, either from me or from his dad, or I would have felt like an idiot. I’m thinking now he took the class because it would be an easy A. 🙂
A friend told me of seeing a distraught young woman trying repeatedly to unlock her car with the remote, to no avail. He asked her if he could help and could he have the key? She handed him the key, he inserted it into the lock, turned it, opened the door and handed her the key. She just stood
there looking flabbergasted.
This is what technology does to people. It makes idiots. But then again, can you saddle a horse or hook him up to a plow? Times, they are achanging.
Heff: seems to be the German manufacturers. They think we are too stupid to read the dipstick. Come to think of it, if you can’t put gas in your car you are probably too stupid to check the oil.
I think that’s on purpose, part of the crony capitalism, so the car dealerships or oil-change businesses can make money on oil changes, maintenance, etc. Don’t allow people to know how to do anything themselves.
https://youtu.be/WkZJSFd0Ghw
in thepeoples republic of nj no gas pumping is allowed. Smoking on the beach is prohibited. Smoke on the boardwalk and you are shot by a code enforcement sniper. Walk your dog on boardwalk, death by hanging. Want to cut a tree down on your property? 50 bucks and written permission from Govenor Cameltoe. To renew your drivers license please provide passport, bank statement, marriage licsense, birth certificate, blood and stool sample. When exiting motor vehicle please dress appropriately and only speak Spanish so as not to offend the illegal aliens. Parking fees are one dollar per minute. Enjoy your day. Enjoy the beach. For your safety, no swimming is allowed.
Utopia, right?
Southern girls know what to do. They know how to insert the hose and pump all they need.
I’m not saying Yankees are dumb…..but they’re dumb.
Bea, I’m from the Deep South, in South Carolina. When I was little, the gas stations still had attendants. While the gas was pumping, we used to smash our faces and hands to the front windshield and back glass as the attendant cleaned them, which, of course, made a mess on the inside of the car glass. I remember my dad saying to the gas attendant, “$2 worth, please, sir.” $2 won’t get you far today.
When I was beginning junior high, self-service gas stations came to town. We used to jump at the chance to pump gas. I didn’t get to very much because my brothers muscled in. We thought it was so cool. No wonder gas station attendants were usually teenagers.
And apparently, it a kid thing to want to pump gas because as soon as my son was big enough, he used to almost beg to pump the gas.
Our last full-service gas station didn’t close until the some time in the mid 1980s. It was the last one around. The old ladies used to go there because that’s what they were used to. The younger people adapted to the new self-serve without a problem, but the older people sure didn’t like it.
Vic- Welcome to the southern camp of TBP!
Heck, the year I got married you could fill up the car for $3. That was almost 50 years ago and you are right the old ladies sure had their undies in a knot over the prospect of pumping gas. We had a few stations left here in the great commonwealth of KY that would pump gas for 1 penny extra on the gallon up to a few years ago.
The consumer has taken on the jobs of many people over the years for free if you think about it. We are the baggers and cashier at many stores in the self check line, we replaced many sales people with online purchase of various items and yes, we freakkin pump gas.
I too am from the deep south but moved up here near the Mason-Dixon line decades ago. Even this close to enemy territory, girls know how to pump gas.