Someone will draw a dick and balls on them, just wait.
Maggie
December 11, 2017 7:07 pm
Look, I was going to share this with others here because it is a wonderful holiday cookie recipe. I tried to log in, failed and don’t want to lock myself out of the blog. Last time I forgot my password, I got BANNED by trying too many times. So, I’ll just PLOP this here. I have a list of passwords, but I long for the olden days when you didn’t need dozens of passwords to communicate.
So, if it is something someone thinks they would like to try, here it is. It is just about the best low sugar cookie EVER.
Hungarian Poppy Seed Crescent Cookies (Maggie’s Mom-in-Law’s recipe)
1 cup butter
8 oz cream cheese
1 egg
1 tsp fresh lemon peel/(1/4 tsp dried lemon peel)
¼ cup honey or maple syrup (My MIL used honey. I use
maple syrup. I do not like processed granulated sugar, but it all cooks up about the same,honestly. I just think that honey or natural sugars have other beneficial elements.)
Blend all that into a nice creamy batter.
Mix together the dry ingredients.
2 cups all purpose flour.
Yes, I do grind white wheat sometimes to bake, but a good high quality all purpose flour is fine. I am trying to come up with an almond/rice flour that will bake a decent cookie. I’ll let you know. Don’t hold your breath.
½ tsp baking soda (Here’s the deal…You want these cookies to be a bit crusty to hold their form, so too much baking soda is a bad idea. I actually use LESS than a half tsp because I know what it should LOOK like and FEEL like.)
1/4 tsp salt (when you have very little sugar in a recipe, a tiny bit of salt goes a LONG way)
Mix with creamed butter mixture with mixer or by hand until a crumbly dough forms. Divide into FOUR balls of dough and chill for one hour. (That was Momma Grooch’s directions. I chill them until they are firm, but pliant.)
Poppy Seed filling
1/4 tsp ground clove
1 tsp cinnamon
¾ cup Solo poppy seed filling.*
2 Tbsp honey or maple syrup
.
Powdered sugar to dust finished cookie, if desired. It does make it a bit of a treat to sift just a bit of powdered sugar onto the cooled cookies, but it really isn’t needed, in my opinion. (This was a sticky point with my husband, whose mother dusted all her cookies with either powdered or granulated sugar.
I finally relented and added some sugar. Nick says they are now “perfect.” The man works his ASS off for me around here. If he wants REAL powdered sugar on his cookie, he should get it, right? Here’s a picture of Nick while the cookies were baking. Did I marry well or WHAT?)
[img[/img]
In a small glass bowl, mix the ingredients and divide into
four pastry balls. I put each ball on a square of wax paper in the frig until dough is firm enough to roll out and cut into two-inch squares. Put a PLOP** of poppy seed mixture into the middle of the square, then close the pastry square by pinching two diagonal corners together and patting the middle flat. The result looks MORE like a bow tie than a crescent, but HEY, I didn’t name them. I just make them.
375 degrees for 20 minutes or just until the crust begins to brown (or longer for a crunchier cookie.)
*I saw that the Solo Poppy Seed Filling has sugar added. I may have to start growing my own poppies. Haha!
** A Plop is somewhere between a dollop and a spoonful
[img[/img]
Disclaimer: I have NO idea if poppy seeds will make you test positive on a drug test. Don’t care.
The poppy seed situation can be rated as a possibility that depends on how much/many you eat versus your size and how much has been flushed from the system before the test. Back in the mid – 80’s we were warned to be careful with and poppy seed recipe and a unit drug test.
They also said the same thing about minoxydil too……
One guy I knew tested positive for marijuana at 18 years. 18 years.
He TOLD me it was because he ate sesame seeds all the time. I almost fell for it. I was going to call all the important people I knew in the world (that included one or two CHIEFS at Langley, but they may have made a difference… I got one guy out of a really bad predicament once with a phone call) and demand a “retest.”
The guy must have really liked me (kinda like Coyote has come to like his red rope here). He took me aside and told me he smoked a doobie on his way to work the day of the piss test.
Sometimes? I being out the “honest” in people. I really AM a nice lady and that comes through. People come to know I will fight for my friends until someone falls.
The cisgender cookies must taste like sausage or tuna.
BL
December 11, 2017 7:58 pm
Gingerbread man is male. Never heard of the gingerbread woman. All of the gingerbread man books for children were titled “The Gingerbread MAN”.
The is no such thing as a genderless friggin’ gingerbread man.
Fjord
December 11, 2017 8:10 pm
Ugh. I was out of butter (and my house is always margerine deficient) the other day but wanted to bake a cake, so I searched it and got every form of egg-less, butter-less, milk-less and no flour recipe out there. They probably all taste like dirt.
I ended up making pudding instead.
Maggie
December 11, 2017 8:49 pm
Darling, I have made “do” with all kinds of substitutes over the 25 + years of marriage. Nothing I make EVER tastes like dirt.
Coconut oil = butter = lard = FAT
Egg equals yogurt equals whole milk equals half a pureed banana or apple
Flour can be made of many grains/legumes with a good grinder
Leavening is problematic, but NOT impossible. If I have NO yeast, baking soda or baking powder? Dump some vinegar into whole milk to sour it, add an egg and the gases will start forming. However, this is not reliable, so…
I purchased a SHITLOAD of baking soda, vacuum sealed it and we are set for the next decade. Up yours monkeys!
Grog
December 11, 2017 8:55 pm
One of those cookies self-identifies as a pot brownie.
A couple years ago, after moving here, I was experimenting with some regional “herbs” and made a concoction which I put in the freezer.
My husband ate a bunch of the frozen stuff, thinking it was a frozen granola/cream treat I make from time to time.
My husband, who spent the majority of his adult life in USAF instruction/professional/disciplined atmosphere got STONED on the “herb” my friend gave to me that she had harvested from her garden.
My husband will no longer eat anything out of the freezer without asking permission. LOL
When my son was a baby, I used a pump at work and froze extra breast milk in baby bottle inserts to send to the babysitter. Nick thought it was popsicles one time. (Breast milk is kind of sweet.)
Gross. I still love him, but that TWICE he’s gotten into something in the freezer.
How do they make more cookies then
Cloning.
Meanwhile, vulva-equipped cookies are selling like a California wildfire.
Hardehar.
Someone will draw a dick and balls on them, just wait.
Look, I was going to share this with others here because it is a wonderful holiday cookie recipe. I tried to log in, failed and don’t want to lock myself out of the blog. Last time I forgot my password, I got BANNED by trying too many times. So, I’ll just PLOP this here. I have a list of passwords, but I long for the olden days when you didn’t need dozens of passwords to communicate.
So, if it is something someone thinks they would like to try, here it is. It is just about the best low sugar cookie EVER.
Hungarian Poppy Seed Crescent Cookies (Maggie’s Mom-in-Law’s recipe)
1 cup butter
8 oz cream cheese
1 egg
1 tsp fresh lemon peel/(1/4 tsp dried lemon peel)
¼ cup honey or maple syrup (My MIL used honey. I use
maple syrup. I do not like processed granulated sugar, but it all cooks up about the same,honestly. I just think that honey or natural sugars have other beneficial elements.)
Blend all that into a nice creamy batter.
Mix together the dry ingredients.
2 cups all purpose flour.
Yes, I do grind white wheat sometimes to bake, but a good high quality all purpose flour is fine. I am trying to come up with an almond/rice flour that will bake a decent cookie. I’ll let you know. Don’t hold your breath.
½ tsp baking soda (Here’s the deal…You want these cookies to be a bit crusty to hold their form, so too much baking soda is a bad idea. I actually use LESS than a half tsp because I know what it should LOOK like and FEEL like.)
1/4 tsp salt (when you have very little sugar in a recipe, a tiny bit of salt goes a LONG way)
Mix with creamed butter mixture with mixer or by hand until a crumbly dough forms. Divide into FOUR balls of dough and chill for one hour. (That was Momma Grooch’s directions. I chill them until they are firm, but pliant.)
Poppy Seed filling
1/4 tsp ground clove
1 tsp cinnamon
¾ cup Solo poppy seed filling.*
2 Tbsp honey or maple syrup
.
Powdered sugar to dust finished cookie, if desired. It does make it a bit of a treat to sift just a bit of powdered sugar onto the cooled cookies, but it really isn’t needed, in my opinion. (This was a sticky point with my husband, whose mother dusted all her cookies with either powdered or granulated sugar.
I finally relented and added some sugar. Nick says they are now “perfect.” The man works his ASS off for me around here. If he wants REAL powdered sugar on his cookie, he should get it, right? Here’s a picture of Nick while the cookies were baking. Did I marry well or WHAT?)
[img
[/img]
In a small glass bowl, mix the ingredients and divide into
four pastry balls. I put each ball on a square of wax paper in the frig until dough is firm enough to roll out and cut into two-inch squares. Put a PLOP** of poppy seed mixture into the middle of the square, then close the pastry square by pinching two diagonal corners together and patting the middle flat. The result looks MORE like a bow tie than a crescent, but HEY, I didn’t name them. I just make them.
375 degrees for 20 minutes or just until the crust begins to brown (or longer for a crunchier cookie.)
*I saw that the Solo Poppy Seed Filling has sugar added. I may have to start growing my own poppies. Haha!
[/img]
** A Plop is somewhere between a dollop and a spoonful
[img
Disclaimer: I have NO idea if poppy seeds will make you test positive on a drug test. Don’t care.
The poppy seed situation can be rated as a possibility that depends on how much/many you eat versus your size and how much has been flushed from the system before the test. Back in the mid – 80’s we were warned to be careful with and poppy seed recipe and a unit drug test.
They also said the same thing about minoxydil too……
One guy I knew tested positive for marijuana at 18 years. 18 years.
He TOLD me it was because he ate sesame seeds all the time. I almost fell for it. I was going to call all the important people I knew in the world (that included one or two CHIEFS at Langley, but they may have made a difference… I got one guy out of a really bad predicament once with a phone call) and demand a “retest.”
The guy must have really liked me (kinda like Coyote has come to like his red rope here). He took me aside and told me he smoked a doobie on his way to work the day of the piss test.
Sometimes? I being out the “honest” in people. I really AM a nice lady and that comes through. People come to know I will fight for my friends until someone falls.
Hasn’t been me so far.
nice Yagi, btw. what meter?
The cisgender cookies must taste like sausage or tuna.
Gingerbread man is male. Never heard of the gingerbread woman. All of the gingerbread man books for children were titled “The Gingerbread MAN”.
The is no such thing as a genderless friggin’ gingerbread man.
Ugh. I was out of butter (and my house is always margerine deficient) the other day but wanted to bake a cake, so I searched it and got every form of egg-less, butter-less, milk-less and no flour recipe out there. They probably all taste like dirt.
I ended up making pudding instead.
Darling, I have made “do” with all kinds of substitutes over the 25 + years of marriage. Nothing I make EVER tastes like dirt.
Coconut oil = butter = lard = FAT
Egg equals yogurt equals whole milk equals half a pureed banana or apple
Flour can be made of many grains/legumes with a good grinder
Leavening is problematic, but NOT impossible. If I have NO yeast, baking soda or baking powder? Dump some vinegar into whole milk to sour it, add an egg and the gases will start forming. However, this is not reliable, so…
I purchased a SHITLOAD of baking soda, vacuum sealed it and we are set for the next decade. Up yours monkeys!
One of those cookies self-identifies as a pot brownie.
Grog… funny story.
A couple years ago, after moving here, I was experimenting with some regional “herbs” and made a concoction which I put in the freezer.
My husband ate a bunch of the frozen stuff, thinking it was a frozen granola/cream treat I make from time to time.
My husband, who spent the majority of his adult life in USAF instruction/professional/disciplined atmosphere got STONED on the “herb” my friend gave to me that she had harvested from her garden.
My husband will no longer eat anything out of the freezer without asking permission. LOL
I understand.
A guy I know complained to his wife that the milk in the fridge was ‘yucky’. He threw it out.
She exclaimed,” Oh my gosh, my starter!”
When my son was a baby, I used a pump at work and froze extra breast milk in baby bottle inserts to send to the babysitter. Nick thought it was popsicles one time. (Breast milk is kind of sweet.)
Gross. I still love him, but that TWICE he’s gotten into something in the freezer.