FRIDAY FAIL

Look outside. What’s the weather like? If it’s bright and sunny and you say it’s bright and sunny, you may be a victim of what experts (i.e., me) are calling Reality Devotion Syndrome (RDS). Typically RDS sufferers are white, non-crippled, non-faggot men. Their IQs are usually well above average, which would be impressive were IQ not white patriarch malarkey. RDS sufferers are quite dangerous as they tend to assault people with dangerous facts, insensible of the damage they are doing. Here are just a few of the more alarming beliefs these people harbour that are the polar opposite of the narrative your wise and gentle leaders work so hard to inculcate.

– They universally believe that just because President Kennedy was killed with a bullet through the throat and out the back of his head, he couldn’t have been shot from behind.
– Almost all believe that just because no jet parts or passenger parts were found from any of the four planes that crashed on 9/11, because the BBC reported Building 7 collapsed before it collapsed, and because several of the dead hijackers were found alive weeks after 9/11 that your government lied about the terrorist attack! They actually think bin Laden didn’t do it. It’s sad how some people can be so married to reality.
– They all believe that just because thousands of people signed affidavits stating they witnessed fraud, like seeing thousands of ballots arrive in the dead of night—almost all for Biden—and feeding ballots through the election machines again and again, that the election was somehow stolen. Almost as crazy, they think that thousands of dead, underage, out-of state, and foreign voters voted, almost all for Biden, also constitutes fraud. These people need help.
– They somehow believe that a couple of hundred unarmed people strolling peacefully through Congress at the invite of the Capitol Police does not constitute the worst insurrection in US history since the 1860s. What are they smoking?
– They all believe that half a million to a million new cases of covid per day, almost all among the double and triple vaccinated, means that the vaccines aren’t working. What loons! Moreover, they think that tens of thousands dropping dead within a few days of the shot suggests some sort of safety defect. They think masks and lockdowns don’t work simply because the jurisdictions that imposed them have been the hardest hit with every wave of the virus. These are dangerous thoughts that will kill your grandmother!
– Even worse than any of this they somehow believe that just because whites are responsible for virtually every useful invention and discovery in history that white culture isn’t a curse on humanity! Many still think 2 + 2 = 4! Self-centred white patriarchs! How dare they presume other cultures adhere to their arbitrary, white mathematics.

If you see someone with RDS—a dead giveaway is they don’t even wear masks!—keep your distance and call a nearby jackboot to beat him senseless and arrest him before he can infect you with his beliefs, not to mention killer covid. I’m sure you’ll agree, facts and common sense have no place in today’s society and anyone spouting them must be silenced for the greater good.

This week’s Friday Fail of the Week award goes to leftists, who accept the official narrative on, well, everything. Worse, their snooty proboscises are forever inserting themselves into our affairs, making our lives much more irksome. Leftists arsepipes, you make the species incalculably weaker, so please do the world some good for a change and get yourself neutered.