After Seeing The Jump In Trump’s Poll Numbers, Biden Orders FBI To Raid His House Too

Via Babylon Bee

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WASHINGTON, D.C. — According to sources close to the Biden Administration, President Biden responded to seeing Trump’s jump in poll numbers by ordering the FBI to raid his house too.

These orders come at a time when Biden’s approval rating has reached record lows, due to 20 consecutive months of unfortunate disasters that allegedly had nothing to do with Biden or his policies, but were the fault of everyone else, especially Trump.

“Hey, FBI guys, I could use some of those higher poll numbers,” wrote President Biden on a piece of paper before shoving it under the basement door in hopes that one of his handlers on the outside would deliver it to an FBI guy. “P.S., I could use another diaper change right about now.”

At publishing time, Biden had instructed — via letters shoved under the door — that groundskeepers plant a few palm trees in the Rose Garden and that everyone call The White House by its new name, Mar-a-Lago, D.C.

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11 Comments
fujigm
fujigm
August 20, 2022 2:17 pm

Classic.
BB is hilarious.

piearesquared
piearesquared
August 20, 2022 2:39 pm

Actually, the raid was all theater, and part of the objective was to keep Trump in the spotlight, and to raise his poll numbers. The NWO wants Trump to be the Republican nominee for 2024 (instead of DeSantis). They intend for 2024 to be a rematch of 2016, with Hillary winning this time.

ken31
ken31
  piearesquared
August 20, 2022 3:40 pm

I only disagree about Hillary winning, I think TLPTB want Trump back in. I still suspect the security state helped Trump win the first time by out- cheating the Clinton campaign.

piearesquared
piearesquared
  ken31
August 20, 2022 9:15 pm

Yes, they did want Trump to win in 2016, and they probably did commit election fraud to ensure that he won. It just wasn’t as obvious as the fraud in 2020.

ken31
ken31
  piearesquared
August 21, 2022 1:25 am

To be fair, I don’t know that Trump knew about it, and I believe he would have won in a fair election, but the bookies were estimating Hillary was going to fake at least 10% votes.

ATarese
ATarese
  ken31
August 21, 2022 12:46 pm

He’s a good actor. Of course he knew he was going to be installed, for a decade or two as well. His role was to win the trust of the 50% less likely to sheep up and be the smiling face to launch warpspeed self inflicted genocide.

ken31
ken31
August 20, 2022 3:38 pm

I suspect the actual conspiracy was to improve Trumps numbers. I don’t believe anything I see in politics.

Marky
Marky
August 20, 2022 7:20 pm

I think the lawsuit Trump against Hillary/ DOJ Russia/Gate and the evidence he has in the ongoing case is the best possible motive for the raid. Its the most obvious reason and makes greater sense.

Anonymous
Anonymous
August 20, 2022 8:05 pm

This would only raise the FBI’s poll numbers.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
August 20, 2022 11:29 pm

Knowing how much support George Floyd received after overdosing on fentanyl while in custody following the commission of a crime, maybe Biden should pursue that avenue instead.

bucknp
bucknp
August 21, 2022 10:35 am