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It is my sincere desire to provide readers of this site with the best unbiased information available, and a forum where it can be discussed openly, as our Founders intended. But it is not easy nor inexpensive to do so, especially when those who wish to prevent us from making the truth known, attack us without mercy on all fronts on a daily basis. So each time you visit the site, I would ask that you consider the value that you receive and have received from The Burning Platform and the community of which you are a vital part. I can't do it all alone, and I need your help and support to keep it alive. Please consider contributing an amount commensurate to the value that you receive from this site and community, or even by becoming a sustaining supporter through periodic contributions. [Burning Platform LLC - PO Box 1520 Kulpsville, PA 19443] or Paypal
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To donate via Stripe, click here.
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Use promo code ILMF2, and save up to 66% on all MyPillow purchases. (The Burning Platform benefits when you use this promo code.)
Friday Fail Shallow Thought of the Week:
There was this guy; call him Phat Phuck Phil. (By the way, if you tell someone to fuck off and he takes offense, just reassure him that you said P-H-U-C-K, not F-U-C-K and watch his brow furrow; also watch out for his left hook—it’s nasty.) Phil used to walk along the beach and draw in the tide. He’d go for a swim and a passing Japanese fishing trawler would harpoon him. Still he wouldn’t admit to a weight problem. He’d look into his full-length mirror, which contained only one-third of him, full-width mirrors being unavailable due to vanity, and still wouldn’t clue in. His mirror, like most, perjured itself and told him he looked swell.
I can almost hear you saying, “Oh? Tell me less.”
Stop being so rude.
Phil is similar to covidiots. Most of them remain sublimely ignorant, and we have to admire how dedicated they are to staying that way. We all chuckle when they whine about catching their fourth case of covid even after getting their third booster. “I just don’t get it,” they bleat. No you don’t, moron. I mean, you fell for, “If you’ll take our needle that has an unknown chance of killing you or maiming you for life, we’ll give you this donut with pretty sprinkles,” so I guess your ignorance isn’t surprising, but really; if a person complained, “Every time I sip this drink I puke,” wouldn’t you tell him, “Then stop sipping it, you frigging idiot!” Well?
What’s my point, you ask? What a stupid question. This is a shallow thought. By design it’s pointless.
As a Phat Phuck named Phil, I take offense but applaud your accuracy.
As always great opening Bob
Much like a flat chested broad, pointless, but still got my attention.
FF Poll of the Week:
Elon Musk has made a lot of news recently with the Twitter Files business. It’s big news and important news, which is why MSM is completely ignoring it; the primary outlets have spent a combined total of 14 minutes on the subject. When they do mention it, it’s to play down the importance of the revelations. Not much has come out yet on the government’s complicity concerning the censorship suffered by conservatives, especially MAGA supporters. Some say this is because Musk is covering up for the government. Some say he’s controlled opposition, using the CIA’s limited hangout approach; release a bit of truth to hide enormous lies. Others claim he truly supports free speech and has it in for the woke people who turned his daughter into a transgender freak. The truth is likely somewhere between these extremes. Our poll:
Which is closer to the truth?
Elon Musk took over Twitter to unleash an avalanche of free speech on insufferable leftists; he’s on the people’s side = thumbs up
Elon Musk is controlled opposition. With the Republicans in charge of the House as of the new year, Musk’s job is to head off the worst of the anti-censorship assault by fixing blame on a few bad apples at Twitter, leaving the deep state unscathed = thumbs down
Republicans in charge = same song second verse!
Two wings of the same bird.
Good cop/bad cop. Same as it ever was.
The only difference between a Republican and a Democrat is who they want to give your money to.
Mr. Musk is always one the side of . . . HIMSELF !!!
Welcome back, sir! Hope you’re feeling well.
Agreed!
Great to see you & your contrib’s again, fren.
Scout out new ways to get back to full, vibrant health.
Much better. Glad to be back…Thank you.
The good ole days, when i was the channel changer…. for the other channel
This is what we get when we make them wear masks for 2 years.
And this is what we get when they stage a Plannedemic and impose a bunch of fear-based bullshit election changes:
Merry Pissmas!
This could work as an educational moment for the children, whereas those awful drag queen shows for children should be outlawed permanently, and each of their fathers should be kicked so hard in the balls for allowing his children to witness such depravity that he can’t father any more.
The dog days of Christmas when everyone’s humping to get things done.
I doubt there are too many fathers taking their kids to the drag queen story hour. Mostly single Moms.
I like the way you think
Welcome, darling! Santa finally delivered what I asked for.
Watching this for the rest of the day……BYE!
Where’s THIS toboggan run? I’d like to visit, and comfort that damsel in distress.
Bebe, I’ll warm you up.
But, you can leave your boots on.
and a cute blonde with pigtails too!
Handlebars
HotLips Hoolihan?
Two! Santa, thank you so much. I’m overwhelmed, and I promise to stop calling you Fat Fuck.
Wind mill finally tilts back!
Tilting at windmills
Looking at the neighborhood…
. . . I’d say barely missing the trash can is an accurate reflection of how close to white trash it is.
(Yeah! Bring on those downvotes, LOL)
Yeah, not moving.
Aunty Tit. . . I mean Brit, I love you.
As Darla would’ve said: “Why, ALFALFA!”
Only the oldtimers here might remember that from Our Gang.
Normal kid. Just sad what will happen to him when the school system get their hooks into him.
Prepper noob.
Eco porn.
I’m calling bullshit! They all have lids…
I was curious for a second about what success would’ve looked like, but then I came to my senses.
I luv dumb asses, they’re so entertaining, these and boarder face plants. Gotta luv them
Quick reaction. The urge to duck would have struck me just after the board.
In the best tradition of The Atlantic, George suggested to his employer an amnesty because he did his best in the face of uncertainty the load would fit through.
that guy moved fast!
Biden finally provides proof that he had a job.
A for effort. F for result.
Now he’ll need a pole implanted in his spine , if he didn’t drown
Oh come off it! If Hobbs didn’t win the election fair and square, may the earth swallow me up.
Asking for a friend. Where can a guy get one of these girl traps.?
The day Bret went on a special trip with grandma.
Gladys had second thoughts about that takeout order she just
bought for her and little Jimmy at the Wild Game Diner.
I said sit down not sit upside down.
He was told to put his ass down in the chair.
Mission accomplished.
“Fashionably late today – sorry”
(As if I was ever fashionable the last twenty years or so…)
EDIT: Forgot to log in as SoH first – a nice little Friday fail in and of itself.
How Charhead got his nickname.
Near empty grain silos used to explode from
this all the time. Now they have dust fans.
Flour power.
“Pink-stink” chairs are all the rage.
The latest supply chain problem was caused by allowing women to drive fork lifts for the first time.
Now make me a sammich! lol!
What’s most remarkable about this gif is her fabulous legs.
But yet not a sammich to be seen
Oh come on! I want to see his splotch.
Just wanna get out of the way a message to any of that 20% out there who may be influenced by FACTS but aren’t yet sure about which side of the fence to end up on…
Goodness don’t want her working on me
I never knew watching kite flying was so entertaining.
Stupid introverts–and there are plenty–have one advantage over stupid extroverts; they don’t advertise their folly.
Ah, a fellow INTP.
I’m an INTJ. We’re ever skeptical and think we know everything.
This must be Greek to most here. goat is referring to a personality test. It’s fun to take and very accurate, IMO:
https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test
Rare bird indeed. Welcome to that club.
ISTJ-T after taking the test. you folks are just not “logical” enough?
Virtuoso – ISTP-A whatever the hell that is.
That’s pretty cool. Guess I’m an INFP-A
I’m an INTJ-A, so sayeth the test.
INTJ here also. Getting older & not sure I know everything but do have opinions – if asked.
Love this!
I love the Myers Briggs test! ENFP here.
This drink tastes like fish . . . and it has hairs in it!
Weird Japanese “game” mostly played by children. It’s known as “kancho.” Had it happen to me when I lived in Tokyo. A kid walked up behind me just like you see happening in this gif. I was confused as hell until someone explained what was going on. Still thought it was weird and don’t see the attraction of the “game.”
It may be the greatest crime of child abuse in history.
The old ‘Gay Philosopher’ calendars of the ’50s had one quote that I remember well: ‘Make sure brain is engaged before putting mouth in gear’.
First “gay” person I’ve heard about who makes sense…
. . . but then again it was in the 50s and the definition of “gay” has “evolved.”
right! when I was young “gay” meant happy. never seen a happy fag!
When i was young, blowing a tranny meant your car wouldn’t move.
And a tranny was a 4-speed Muncie…
Roger’s creation of the “bounce dive” proved to be highly unpopular.
Good news, sir. I cleaned the inside of your door real good.
always one dumbass who didn’t read the sign to stay in the vehicle with doors and windows closed until the cleaning is finished. funniest I ever saw here in the Ozarks was a local car-wash like that one where an old farmer went through in his old farm pick-up truck and the woman behind him was in that fancy Gold Cadillac sedan. the brush wound up a length of barbed wire from the truck bed and totally thrashed and ripped her new expensive Caddy to shreds.
They should have these for adults and post them outside of every government building.
That would be “slow children stealing.”
This ranges from 89 times a month for newlyweds to 89 times a decade for couples past their 30th anniversary.
Sad you called the truth, but 89 for newley Weds seems low, and 89 per decade seems very optimistic
married 57 yrs. no records here and only participate thanks to tadalafil!
58 sildenifil
“89 times a decade for couples past their 30th anniversary.” That much? How about past 50th?
In the first year, each time put a penny in a jar, after the year, take out a penny and it will never get emptied.
Jared’s appeal to Santa to join his elves went poorly.
This is Pfizer’s new mRNA spinach.
That package clearly said jimson weed:
Dangerous shit, that.
I’ve always suspected as much from spinach.
Missed it by that much… sorry about that chief.
Wonder what would of happened if he did actual hit that tiny ramp in front of a two story wall.?
Would of …….. try would have cletus.
Opps..
I’ll self apply the required 40 lashes.
Is that enough?
This is very bad for you.
Soon to be Chairman of the Joint Chiefs …
Biden’s new recruit, for disposal of nuclear waste, no doubt.
Wearing no clothes, save for the kink collar,
so luggage theft shouldn’t torpedo this one.
Unless it’s a high end make up kit that won’t fit in the overhead.
Diversity.
Inclusion.
gross
Fetterman’s Bump
All grown up, so brave or some $hit
I think I told this one before here, but when I was 18 I went to the mall with a couple of friends and for a lark we lined up to see Santa. I sat on his lap, and my buddies knelt next to him. Santa said, “Any of you fuckers got a mickey?” (That’s a 12-ounce bottle of booze.) I laughed so hard I nearly pissed myself.
Holy shit. Even KISS has embraced the trans-goth movement.
everyone thinks Elvira is hot too but she’s been a lesbo with a girlfriend for years. sure looked hot back in the 60’s in Playboy though?