The Hate Machine

Guest Post by CJ Hopkins

I think something’s wrong with my Hate Machine.

I’ve got it turned up to 10, but I’m still not feeling it.

The hate. The murderous, self-righteous hate. The mindlessly fanatical hate.

I set the dial to “Palestinians.” Nothing. No reaction whatsoever. So, I set it to “Israelis.” Again, nothing. I just can’t seem to get my hate up. It’s embarrassing. Maybe there are some pills that would help.

Seriously, this is interfering with both my social and professional life. I need to get my hate up somehow. I’ve tried everything I could possibly think of.

I tried reading nothing but news about Israel’s ongoing liquidation of Gaza. I stared at pictures of dead and horribly mutilated Palestinian children. Thousands of them. Killed. Torn to pieces. Residential neighborhoods reduced to rubble. Whole families crushed under tons of concrete.

I told myself, over and over, that they were “terrorists.” Or the children of “terrorists.” Or that they had “voted for terrorists.” Or they were “anti-Semites.” “Human animals.” “The Children of Darkness.”

It didn’t work.

I tried reading nothing but news about the Hamas attack on October 7. The murder of families. The wanton slaughter. I stared at the pictures of the blood-smeared bedrooms. The footage of the executions. I read the messages that people sent to their loved ones before they were shot to death.

I told myself, over and over, that they were “fascists,” “occupiers,” “colonizers,” “Zionazis.” I told myself that they deserved what they got.

Nothing. No arousal whatsoever.

I checked the connections on my Hate Machine. They all seemed fine. So, I tried rebooting it. Twice. Nope. That didn’t work either.

So, finally, I called the Hate Corporation, but I couldn’t get through to a Hate representative, because of “an unusually high volume of callers.”

So, apparently, I’m not the only one with this dysfunction.

That was kind of reassuring. Because, frankly, I’ve been feeling so left out. All the really cool people are grooving on hate. Seriously, check the Internet. It’s like a 24-hour Roman orgy of hate, in which I’m unable to participate, apparently.

I’m sorry for whining. It’s unseemly, I know. And I am fairly sure my inability to achieve and maintain a satisfactory tumescence or protuberance of hate is not my Hate Machine’s fault. I have the latest model, with all the new features.

And other people’s Hate Machines are working just fine.

How is yours doing?

Are you feeling the hate? Are those you hate the embodiment of Evil? They are liars, aren’t they? Liars and murderers. Genociders. Nazis. Subhuman scum. Everything they say is a lie. Everything they do, and are, is wicked. They cannot help it. They were born that way. They need to be wiped off the face of the Earth. They need to be eradicated, don’t they? They are never going to change their ways. Making peace with them is not an option. It’s us or them. They, the others, and all their issue, need to be defeated, vanquished, erased, exterminated.

This is no time for compassion or pity. They, the others, have no morals or ethics, or simple human empathy, so we can’t afford to have any either. None of them are innocent. None of them are civilians. All of them, men, women, and children, are soldiers in the Army of Evil! They’re murderers, so we have to be murderers! They are liars, so we need to become liars! Truth is for children! This is war! We need to kill and kill and kill, and celebrate killing, and swim in their blood, and defile their corpses … the others … our enemies!

Well, what do you know? It appears my Hate Machine is functioning properly after all! Yes, wow, that feels so much better! I guess I just needed to relax, let go, stop thinking so much about what’s right and wrong, and let my hate do what it wants.

Seriously, I’m not kidding, folks … I haven’t had a hate-on like this for years!

I’m ready to join that Roman Orgy of Hatred!

All I need to do now is pick a side.

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24 Comments
zappalives
zappalives
November 22, 2023 6:36 am

Try this simple weird trick CJ.
Turn the hate inward and feed the hate while starving the love.

Simplecarpenter
Simplecarpenter
  zappalives
November 22, 2023 11:05 pm

Brilliant article , reminds me of The Screwtape Letters , and your reply was like an addendum , a kind of “Screwtape Proposes A Toast” if you will . Muh , whatever ,its probably just that my hate machine isn’t functioning as designed either .

Hal P
Hal P
November 22, 2023 6:42 am

I also don’t care.

Not our fight.

The Central Scrutinizer
The Central Scrutinizer
November 22, 2023 7:11 am

You gotta admire any idiot that thinks “caring” is going to change so much as a single outcome.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  The Central Scrutinizer
November 22, 2023 7:17 am

Welcome to the matriarchy, pal.

The Central Scrutinizer
The Central Scrutinizer
  Anonymous
November 22, 2023 8:36 am

Way to kick me in my feelz when I’m down!

Simplecarpenter
Simplecarpenter
  The Central Scrutinizer
November 22, 2023 11:08 pm

So when you take out the garbage for “Mrs Central Scrutinizer ” do you find you cant perform that neccesary task without working up a good thoroughgoing resentment first ?

m
m
  The Central Scrutinizer
November 22, 2023 7:39 am

And you gotta admire those idiots who think “forcing” is going to change a single thing towards a long-term better.

The Central Scrutinizer
The Central Scrutinizer
  m
November 22, 2023 8:38 am

Death solves all problems. No man, no problem.

m
m
  The Central Scrutinizer
November 22, 2023 9:46 am

That works both ways, ya know. Enjoy.

Simplecarpenter
Simplecarpenter
  The Central Scrutinizer
November 22, 2023 11:11 pm

It does , and you will know , if you possess the proper discernment , when to be and when not to be the facilitator of that particular condition for someone . No need to get emotionally triggered over it .

Anonymous
Anonymous
  The Central Scrutinizer
December 11, 2023 5:27 pm

I generally do not down vote ya Nr scrutinizer, but here I gotta part company with you. Giving a fuck about other people is precisely the fulcrum point in all of this business . Maybe tough love is a counter intuitive notion but people need ,so that they may understand ,to reap what they have sown . Otherwise you are just subsidizing / enabling / creating moral hazards. Care enough to leave folks to there own devices in other word . Redneck comedy tour , kid getting ready to stick fork in electrical outlet mom wanting to intervene , dad seeing the potential for a” teachable moment “lol .

A9racer
A9racer
November 22, 2023 7:29 am

I had a talk with God about it. He set me straight. I have invited people over for Thanksgiving that I don’t particularly care for. But they are welcome to our table. Some need fellowship. Some just need a human connection. And all of them need my wife’s cooking.
My mother won’t be here because she hates my brothers girlfriend. She will miss her grand and great-grandchildren because she cannot get past one woman. I am glad my heart is not filled with hate.
I was a wild child, a terrible young adult, not the best father and an insufferable asshole most of my life. But as I have gotten older, I realize things I thought were important are nothing to me or anyone else. I can’t make up for some of the stuff I have done. But I can see the good in people as well as the evil as it was in me. I want to bring that good out in myself and be a better husband, father, brother, grandpa.
So, if you can and you know someone who really needs it, please show some compassion this Thanksgiving with an invite. Some of those I invited were certainly surprised. And we will damn sure be talking politics and religion!
Take care, all you TBPers, you Friday Failers, you critical thinkers and even the insufferable assholes on here.
Give Thanks for all we have while we still have it.

Stay aware and be prepared,
A9racer

Ben Lurken
Ben Lurken
  A9racer
November 22, 2023 8:15 am

report back.

The Central Scrutinizer
The Central Scrutinizer
  A9racer
November 22, 2023 8:45 am

One size never fit all. And it never will.

A9racer
A9racer
  The Central Scrutinizer
November 22, 2023 9:27 am

“So, if you can…”

Simplecarpenter
Simplecarpenter
  A9racer
November 22, 2023 11:14 pm

Bravo Sir , and right back at you . From a member of the insufferable asshole contingent to you .

The bone is already gnawing the dog
The bone is already gnawing the dog
November 22, 2023 8:39 am

Don’t vote for the system’s candidate and never believe that the “government” wants your best.
See “Cismogenesis”

The bone is already gnawing the dog
The bone is already gnawing the dog
November 22, 2023 8:49 am

His “Hate Machine” has the compass pointing north. It’s very well adjusted.
Is there a book capable of naming the Time Lords with perfect accuracy?

Gaping sphincter
Gaping sphincter
November 22, 2023 11:41 am

Wow ten articles down and not one mention of JFK’s assassination anniversary.

Anonymous
Anonymous
November 22, 2023 11:51 am

Turn your hate machine up to Democrat politician and let me know how you feel…

Anonymous
Anonymous
November 22, 2023 12:12 pm

I don’t know, mine is pretty consistently directed at my own government these days.

Jdog
Jdog
November 22, 2023 2:35 pm

Genocide Joe, and the Democrats deserve the hate for the evil they have done, and the evil they are as people……

Simplecarpenter
Simplecarpenter
  Jdog
November 22, 2023 11:18 pm

Suppose we could just unburden ourselves of them, as we ought to, minus the need to fester our hearts in resentment . would we really be any the less for it ?