In the midst of heavy winter blizzards, digging yourself out of the drifts can be both an inconvenient chore and a dangerous task linked to fatigue and heart attacks. Here are some safety tips to keep in mind while shoveling snow:
- Before heading outside to shovel, do your best to reverse the 40 years of poor health choices that have put you at high risk for getting a heart attack.
- Taking a few minutes to stretch before shoveling is a great way to unnecessarily prolong an already unpleasant chore.
- Bending from the back can damage your spine; always damage your knees instead.
- Prevent snow from sticking to your shovel by coating both sides in a layer of butter.
- Throw the snow over whichever shoulder you’d like; no need for superstition.
- Pace yourself and take a five-minute break for every 500,000 snowflakes you shovel.
- Be sure to wear a frostbite whistle at all times.
- Stay hydrated by shoveling every third load of snow directly into your mouth.
- As much as possible, try living in a condo building.
- If all else fails, pay a real man to do it for you.
Neighbors Come Together To Watch BMW Owner Struggle In Snow
EVANSTON, IL—Putting aside their own responsibilities and quickly gathering at their neighbor’s driveway, Foster Street residents reportedly came together Monday to watch a BMW owner struggle to free his car from the snow. “I threw on a coat and headed outside as soon as I saw that his car was really stuck,” said neighborhood resident David Rinaldi, who immediately stopped what he was doing to join other locals and passersby who had assembled for a better view of the frustrated driver revving the luxury vehicle’s engine and spinning the tires in vain. “His car wasn’t going anywhere, so I knew I should come out and get a good look at him barely moving back and forth as his BMW made loud screeching noises.” Rinaldi confirmed that the BMW owner had done the same for him in the past.
“Prevent snow from sticking to your shovel by coating both sides in a layer of butter.”
——– from the article
Doesn’t work, obviously. Neither do various oils, WD-40, etc.
Here’s what does work. Rub the shovel with a nice heavy coat of paraffin wax (or, if you don’t have any, car wax) ….. snow just slides right off.
what is this “snow?”
Having lived in Minnesota for over 30 years….
Work hard and get yourself a home with a 2- 3 car heated garage. I keep mine at 55, and it has a floor drain. Buy the best snow blower you can. I have a Honda – 2 stage – has treads. It was $1,400 in 1993 – now the same model sells for $3,200!
If I had to park on the street – I’d have a shit box car.
Own a well trained and physically fit teenage boy.
HSF –
The linky to your farm’s website doesn’t lead to your farm anymore. How can we find you? It’s almost time to order some more maple syrup!!
Please advise.
Put gasoline in a garden sprayer, and just burn that shit off. If boredom overtakes you, try smoking.
Stucky does not like snow on his property….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ip23xCdAozY
Fucking Hilarious. Pretty much covers it, though.
My dad went apeshit (not as badly) last year when the street plow blocked the driveway with snow, after I shoveled it. He even called city hall and told them to come back and clear the goddamned driveway because he’s too goddamned old to do it and that his son (me) already left the fucking premises. Mom told me. Wish I could have been there.
I’ve not seen a snowflake all year except for pictures on TBP.
Snow seems to be rare here in the last few years. A heated garage. Then just drive through the snow on the driveway. Unless its that high. There are plenty of people who can use some cash. Find one who will shovel out your driveway. I have my wife and kids trained.
I hate that when you have everything cleaned up and then the plow leaves a big berm at the end of the drive.If you leave it o long it turns into ice and is hard to get rid of.
Our regular plow guy is having health issues and had to retire (from pushing snow with a truck, yes he is large, yes he is my bro-in-law), so we got a new guy.
When bro-in-law first started plowing our drive, he plowed the snow across the street into the neighbors big front yard (no sidewalks in front, don’t use the front, sits back 75 feet from the road). Within a couple weeks my neighbor came freaking out about it. That was ten years ago.
Last night we get a late-night knock at the door, it’s the neighbor again, seems the new plowguy was pushing snow into his yard again.
He says, “well, it looks like this is a habit and I checked with the city it is illegal to push your snow or leaves into neighbors yards.”
Oh goody.
Old people crack me up. No harm to his yard, it is snow for goodness sake and his yard is full of snow, but my GOD if we don’t STOP IT the law will be involved.
Sidenote: why are so many people so inconsiderate now? This country is full of whine ass, litigious, babies that sit on their asses with their phones in arms reach to call and cause trouble for people, WHY would you ASK for it? We have a HUGE yard with plenty of space to pile snow, I hate that I have to nag a guy to pull his head from his ass.