WASHINGTON, D.C.—In an earnest discussion with Joe Biden’s pandemic response team, Dr. Fauci urged the nation to return to its roots and obey government orders without question as the founding fathers intended.
“Listen, it shouldn’t be this difficult,” said Dr. Fauci. “Americans are known as an obedient and subservient people, all the way back to the founding. We must urge our country to obey orders from unelected experts with complete trust just like Patrick Henry, George Washington, and John Adams did.”
According to unelected experts, this pandemic is the greatest threat faced by mankind in the history of mankind — even greater than the Black Death, the Third Reich, and microaggressions on college campuses.
“This is a wily and tricksey virus that seems to target family gatherings, joyful celebrations, and conservative activity while completely ignoring left-wing protestors,” said Fauci. “We know because of science. And all our sciency science is too sciency for all you non-science people, so you just have to trust us.”
According to very highly scientific studies from scientific scientists, Americans are evenly divided between people who think the government should be obeyed without question and people who are murderous psychopaths.
“There’s really no middle ground on this,” said Fauci.
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Nobody trusts or believes you Fauci , so save us all your B/S crap.
““Listen, it shouldn’t be this difficult,” said Dr. Fauci. “Americans are known as an obedient and subservient people, all the way back to the founding. We must urge our country to obey orders from unelected experts with complete trust just like Patrick Henry, George Washington, and John Adams did.””
WHAT ???!!!
Could someone tell me which world this guy grew up in. From this statement I wonder how he was ever smart enough to become a doctor. It is no wonder President Trump had “problems” with him!!
This is satire.
Are you really certain about that?? I have listened fairly closely to what he has said; and this is not very far from reality. He is however smart enough to have never actually made this exact statement
Fauci actually said (regarding the virus) “Now is the time to do what you are told”. The BB satire reflects that pretty well.
We are adults and he wants us to act like little children. Nope. Share the data, make recommendations if you like, and everything else is just opinion, his included. Thinking adults are far preferable to sheep, except when wool is needed.
It’s good satire (made easy by already laughable things actually said by the objects of that satire).
Another wonderfully jovial morning.
Zerohedge has an article on work at home people becoming more racist. Not kidding. A study sez so.
And Biden’s mirage of cabinet picks has one leftist group howling already.
Hard not to split my sides.
Thank God we still have gravity.
What if millions of Americans were to suddenly revoke their consent to be governed by this criminal, illegitimate government ?
Ever notice that little turds like him or Robert Reich seem to float to the top of the bowl. Flushing is what they need .
Ahhhh.. NO!
Americans have Never been obedient and subservient people…
We Americans are a F You kind of people