Taliban Opens Chain Of U.S. Army Surplus Stores

Via The Babylon Bee

KABUL—Now that Allah has seen fit to bless the Taliban with bountiful weapons and equipment from the U.S. Military, terrorists around Afghanistan have built an already thriving chain of U.S. Army Surplus stores.

“We need weapons to kill and subjugate the Afghan people under Sharia Law, but there’s just too much gear here!” said local Taliban leader Bob Muhammed. “There’s, like, billions of dollars and 20 years worth of weaponry around here, and now I can build a thriving business out of selling my wares to other terrorist folk who happen to pass through! Allah be praised!”

Although the merchandise will not be available to the general public (for obvious reasons), Muhammed’s Army Surplus will feature a full selection of deadly weaponry, ammunition, combat boots, MREs, helmets, hashish, and whatever else a soldier of Allah may need.

If successful, Bob Muhammed hopes to open more stores in Iraq and Syria.

The U.S. Government has taken note as new store locations open up for future drone pilot target practice.

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25 Comments
MrLiberty
MrLiberty
August 28, 2021 1:11 pm

Can we all agree that what the entire administration has done is treasonous yet?

Harrington Richardson: Have Lamp Posts-Will Travel
Harrington Richardson: Have Lamp Posts-Will Travel
  MrLiberty
August 28, 2021 1:37 pm

Absolutely. I want to know who thought abandoning $83 Billion of modern equipment was a good idea and hang them in front of a firing squad.
The goat humpers are parading around with M4’s with Trijicon ACOG scopes, considered by those issued them to have been the finest combat optic ever. I see others with M-16A2,3 or 4’s mounting various new night vision scopes. Now the jihadis have rifles with increased range and accuracy with world class optics and the ability to carry two or three times as much ammo for the same weight of the replaced AK’s. Gatling guns in .30 caliber and 20mm. Dozens of ground attack planes, dozens of Blackhawks and even a handful of C-130’s. 75,000 various vehicles. Not a single guy with the smarts to pop a couple of thermite grenades on the way out the door?
Our BS detectors won’t stop ringing.

TN Patriot
TN Patriot

” I want to know who thought abandoning $83 Billion of modern equipment was a good idea”

Many of them are soon to be VP’s at various weapons contractors earning high 6 figures a year. All of this stuff has to be replaced, you know.

Ghost
Ghost
  TN Patriot
August 28, 2021 2:03 pm

Because it is ALWAYS about the money. Just like with Fauci and his wife at the NIH.

If you control the patents, you control the “science.”

Iska Waran
Iska Waran
  MrLiberty
August 28, 2021 1:42 pm

I still come down on the side of just severely retarded. Look at Milley and Austin. Midwits at best. Milley has a laughable chestful of medals for first class retardery and Austin went to Asia dressed like a beekeeper. Acting President for Foreign Affairs Jake Sullivan is clever and sociopathic enough (thankfully) to know that we needed out of Afghanistan no matter the casualties, but not clever enough to have engineered our departing from Bagram or retrieving/destroying our weaponry.

TN Patriot
TN Patriot
  Iska Waran
August 28, 2021 1:48 pm

This equipment was left for the 300,000 strong Afghan army so they could defend the country. As soon as they started folding, we should have put a quick stop to any further retreats.

GNL
GNL
  TN Patriot
August 28, 2021 3:32 pm

Now THAT makes a lot more sense.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  TN Patriot
August 28, 2021 8:41 pm

Our military knew the Afghan army was a joke from the start. Couldn’t trust half of them. A few were disciplined but not enough to be any sort of force. They are tribal and of course would fold back into the Islam way. Big shock there. This had nothing to do with leaving it for the Afghan army because they were mostly of no use before they even started. All that equipment was a nice gift to the Taliban and China. China will be like little kids on Christmas morning with all the tech, equipment, and dreams of riches from all the mining opportunities there. Our gov sold us out..plain and simple.

Ghost
Ghost
  MrLiberty
August 28, 2021 2:01 pm

I think it is beyond treason.

I think Joe Biden was trying to buy himself a seat on the committee of 300 train the lowercase mark mentions, along with others.

He sold the country out to his “controllers” because he knows they plan to collapse the nation and he wanted to have a seat at the table.

It was intentional.

Biden IS the enemy now.

NormanFranklin
NormanFranklin
  Ghost
August 28, 2021 3:52 pm

Kens right Maggie. Biden is nothing but a bag holder. A treasonous piece of shit bag holder but a bag holder nonetheless. Along with the other 535 steaming piles, the blame rests squarely on their narrow shoulders.

I know you are just a bit older than me. I remember vividly our ignominious exit from Vietnam. This seems almost identical. And yet here we are, not having learned an efffing thing. Everyone in our national .Guv along with every command officer O-6 and above should be made to resign/retire. If they fail to do it with good grace they should be forced to fall on their swords. Such a death blow to our empire should bring some small level of accountability.

I say anybody over Sixty shouldn’t even be allowed in Government. The deep state exists for its own enrichment. The praetorian guard protection the deep state from accountability is almost entirely made up of boomers. No offense boomers, just sayin.

Ken31
Ken31
  MrLiberty
August 28, 2021 3:19 pm

No. And here is why. The entire 20 year war was a fucking sham. This is why it was always going to be difficult to get out. There was never any real control or security. Just the illusion of it. They would have had to do a major campaign just to set the conditions for an orderly withdrawal.

The lie was going to get exposed one way or another. Trump was too much a coward to let it happen during his term, but he probably improved the situation by negotiating an exit.

If the operations in Afghanistan were sincere and genuine, this failure wouldn’t have been possible, but it wasn’t. It was always a big show for nefarious purposes.

Biden deserves a lot of personal responsibility (as Senator and VP) but the operation being a clusterfuck was inevitable. If you can’t see the incompetence’s being ubiquitous from your entry level job to your highest level “experts”, you aren’t paying attention at all. Nothing can save this system. It isn’t worth saving.

NormanFranklin
NormanFranklin
  Ken31
August 28, 2021 4:23 pm

I would be in the market for some stingers or RPGs. Just kidding glow niggerz, talking bout warcraft.

'Reality' Doug
'Reality' Doug
  Ken31
August 28, 2021 9:15 pm

Nothing can save this system. It isn’t worth saving.

You folks disgusted with Biden should be disgusted with you naive selves.

TN Patriot
TN Patriot
August 28, 2021 1:50 pm

How much of this equipment will find its way around the world to be used for “friendly fire” events at our military installations and even here in the states?

Ghost
Ghost
  TN Patriot
August 28, 2021 2:09 pm

I expect to see a lot of the small artillery coming across the border soon.

If not already.

TN Patriot
TN Patriot
  Ghost
August 28, 2021 2:29 pm

I have no doubt they will use the equipment to infiltrate the US military.

Suppose the national guard is called out due to a disaster. Would anyone question someone wearing BDU’s, carrying an M-4 with Trijicon scope and helmet with NVG’s? They would be able to go anywhere other soldiers went and become a suicide bomber at the appropriate moment.

I wonder how many manpads were left behind to be used to bring down aircraft taking off or on final approach?

Iska Waran
Iska Waran
  TN Patriot
August 29, 2021 1:39 am

I guess there’s a positive side to being banned from air travel without a vaccine passport.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  TN Patriot
August 28, 2021 11:21 pm

It’s a nice excuse to blame the Taliban for all terrorism in the future.

Stucky
Stucky
  Anonymous
August 29, 2021 7:47 am

I prefer we keep blaming da Joo for everything.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Stucky
August 29, 2021 5:57 pm

Well, they are behind most of the terrorism, after all.

'Reality' Doug
'Reality' Doug
  TN Patriot
August 29, 2021 12:19 pm

Fast and Furious III

lamont cranston
lamont cranston
August 28, 2021 5:54 pm

Betcha Bob won’t ask for a background check.

BTW, Ol’ Leon Panetta sez today we need to re-invade…will do if he parachutes into Kabul & lead the offensive

Ned Kelly
Ned Kelly
August 28, 2021 9:39 pm

If the Taliwackers run short of guns just go see Trudeau…

“We the lawful firearm owners of Canada would like to call on The Right Honorable Justin Trudeau, as a show of solidarity and understanding in relation to the May 1, 2020 “assault style” rifle ban to hereby relinquish and consider as banned the 1960 Mercedes Benz 300SL owned by Mr. Trudeau and passed down to Mr. Trudeau by his late father Mr. Pierre Trudeau. We feel that Mr. Trudeau should surrender this vehicle for the following reasons: 1. The maximum speed limit anywhere in Canada is 120 KM/h (74.57 Mph), a Mercedes Benz 300SL can achieve 257 KM/h (160 Mph) far in excess of the legal limit. We believe that no one needs a race car to go buy milk. 2. This vehicle looks like it will go very fast and looks like it was made to serve no other purpose than to participate in illegal street racing. Street racing has cost many lives in Canada and there is no place in Canada for a vehicle who’s only purpose is to street race. 3. Drinking and driving as well as impaired driving under the influence of drugs is a major issue in Canada and in particular the use of race car style vehicles has been shown to be a major factor on Canada’s roads. We understand that Mr. Trudeau may have a reluctance to surrender his privately owned property and may site such reasons as: • I’m a lawful driver • I have a driver’s license • My vehicle is registered • Only criminals drive over the speed limit • Only criminals drink and drive • Only criminals drive under the influence of drugs • Only criminals street race • The appearance of my vehicle has nothing to do with its operational capabilities • My vehicle is very expensive • My vehicle was lawfully acquired • My vehicle is a family heirloom • Confiscation of my vehicle will not stop street racing, drinking and driving or driving under the influence of drugs. We, the lawful firearms owner’s of Canada understand and appreciate Mr. Trudeau’s possible concerns and as such, we believe that there should be options for Mr. Trudeau, these can include: • A buy back program (we call on the Canadian government to buy back Mr’ Trudeau’s Mercedes Benz 300 SL and offer him a price to be decided by a low level bureaucrat who knows nothing about vehicles, perhaps someone from Fisheries and Oceans) • Surrender without compensation. • Grandfathering (no use, transport, sale of the vehicle to be permitted, the vehicle must remain locked in a sea can at all times until Mr. Trudeau passes or decides to surrender the vehicle with no compensation). • Deactivation (The engine compartment to be encased in concrete, door and trunk welded shut “Boots” applied to all wheels and welded closed.) We thank Mr. Trudeau and fully believe that he will want to participate in the banning and confiscation of his beloved family heirloom for the safety of all Canadians and as a show of solidarity with the lawful firearms owners whom he lords over.”

Anonymous
Anonymous
August 28, 2021 11:20 pm

2025: Taliban sends Military Advisors to America, helping white people throw off the evil ZOG and live as free men again.

TampaRed
TampaRed
August 28, 2021 11:37 pm

the left never gives up or stops covering 4 it’s people–
“2 blows america is dealing 2 the taliban ”

https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2021/08/two-blows-america-dealing-taliban/619903/