WTF Story of My Day

Submitted by aka.attrition

Source 1: https://www.wired.com/2009/07/military-researchers-develop-corpse-eating-robots/

Source 2: https://www.mysterious-times.com/2018/05/17/military-researchers-develop-corpse-eating-robots/

Military Researchers Develop Corpse-Eating Robots

MILITARY RESEARCHERS DEVELOP CORPSE-EATING ROBOTS

From the file marked “Evidently, many scientists have never seen even one scary sci-fi movie”: The Defense Department is funding research into battlefield robots that power themselves by eating human corpses. What could possibly go wrong?

Since they apparently don’t own TVs or DVD players, researchers at Robotic Technology say the robots will collect organic matter, which “could” include human corpses, to use for fuel. But if you picked up anything on flesh-eating robots over the years you know they’ll ignore that tasty soybean field and make a chow line right to the nearest dead body. And, if the machines can’t find enough dead people to eat, they can always make new ones.

Researchers seem to get a kick out of ensuring the demise of the human species, so the project is called the Energetically Autonomous Tactical Robot, or EATR. Wired.com readers looking to save time and trouble are invited to begin marinating themselves in a mix of 10W30 and Heinz 57 Sauce immediately.

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30 Comments
Just Thinking
Just Thinking
November 4, 2022 7:08 am

I would like to suggest the first prototypes be field tested in Davos.

Sometime in May would work.

TN Patriot
TN Patriot
  Just Thinking
November 4, 2022 9:13 am

There is an upcoming meeting in Egypt that would be a good place to test them, as well.

Red River D
Red River D
  TN Patriot
November 4, 2022 10:58 am

Fuck em.

Robots gotta eat.

Same as buzzards.

!!!

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Red River D
November 4, 2022 11:09 am

Soylent green is . . . robot food?

Aunt Acid
Aunt Acid
  Anonymous
November 4, 2022 4:19 pm

For finicky robots the only choice is S-oil-ent red.

PSBindy
PSBindy
  Anonymous
November 4, 2022 5:45 pm

Robot food? Not quite. Robot poop.

musket
musket
  Just Thinking
November 4, 2022 4:14 pm

Outstanding observation……

Aunt Acid
Aunt Acid
  Just Thinking
November 4, 2022 4:18 pm

To celebrate the new year perhaps even earlier.

The Central Scrutinizer
The Central Scrutinizer
November 4, 2022 7:28 am

But have they programmed the AI with the proper LBGTQXYZ+ pronouns?

Just Thinking
Just Thinking
  The Central Scrutinizer
November 4, 2022 8:22 am

That’s funny!

My first thought was of my old cat Vinny.

He would eat everything but the digestive tract of all of his conquests.

Just a gut pile on the garage floor, with some odd fur or feathers.

Even these bots might shy away from the alphabet crowd.

God only knows what you’d find in there.

ILuvCO2
ILuvCO2
  Just Thinking
November 4, 2022 8:33 am

Gerbils?

Anonymous
Anonymous
  ILuvCO2
November 4, 2022 9:30 am

Hammers.

Aunt Acid
Aunt Acid
  Anonymous
November 4, 2022 4:20 pm

Paul Piglosi’s keys?

flash
flash
November 4, 2022 8:03 am

I’d love to see them released on the cadavers controlling Congress.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  flash
November 4, 2022 6:18 pm

Same!

I was thinking that this’d make the next Jan. 6th more entertaining….

Anonymous
Anonymous
November 4, 2022 9:30 am

Democrat voters beware!

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Anonymous
November 4, 2022 12:08 pm

Nah, they’re already dead . . . or Dominion algorithms.

TN Patriot
TN Patriot
  Anonymous
November 4, 2022 2:29 pm

Just because they are consumed by a robot does not mean they will not continue to vote straight line dem ticket

AKJOHN
AKJOHN
  TN Patriot
November 4, 2022 4:22 pm

The Democratic motto. The best voters are dead voters as they always do what we say.

World War Zeke
World War Zeke
November 4, 2022 10:17 am

Self-cleaning dystopia.

“Come with me if you want to eat. “

Anonymous
Anonymous
  World War Zeke
November 4, 2022 12:08 pm

Will Whirr For Food

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
November 4, 2022 12:42 pm

You think the GOP is going to defend anything the military wants. LOL.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
  MrLiberty
November 4, 2022 7:21 pm

Sorry, defund, not defend. Damn spellchecker.

AKJOHN
AKJOHN
November 4, 2022 1:01 pm

What sick people come up with this stuff.

aka.attrition
aka.attrition
  AKJOHN
November 4, 2022 1:03 pm

People who only ask “could we” rather than “should we” …

Anonymous
Anonymous
  aka.attrition
November 4, 2022 2:21 pm

Yuval Noah Harari

mark
mark
  Anonymous
November 4, 2022 3:58 pm

Ahhhh….One of the Ashkenazic fudge pack’in Name Stealers….

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Secret History of Khazarian Mafia and its evil plan to hijack the whole world now revealed for first time.

By Preston James, Ph.D – March 10, 2022

The Hidden History of the Incredibly Evil Khazarian Mafia

comment image

LOST SOULS ARE ON THE VERGE OF MERGING WITH SATAN

Anthony Aaron
Anthony Aaron
  AKJOHN
November 4, 2022 4:01 pm

I worked in the weapons & tactics section of Marine Corps Base Camp Pendleton in the mid-’60s … and was involved in testing and evaluating top secret weapons platforms that had either recently been adopted or were about to be adopted.

I learned back then that there are some really, really sick minds out there … designing all sorts of weaponry that would make We The People cringe if they knew about even 25% of it …

musket
musket
November 4, 2022 4:15 pm

Good old DARPA…….wasting time and resources on the worst ideas on the planet.

Jason Calley
Jason Calley
November 4, 2022 6:16 pm

What’s the problem? OUR robots will be good robots. I bet they will have a flag decal on their shiny steel shoulder. Our good robots will only eat bad people corpses. You know, corpses like Nazi corpses, and Taliban corpses. Every Memorial Day our church will honor our brave veteran robots who have protected us from the other robots, the bad robots.