Woman Donates Last Dollar To Warren Campaign In Final Bad Financial Decision

Via The Babylon Bee

PORTSMOUTH, NH—Kymberly Brady, whose bank account was completely empty, realized she only had one dollar left in her wallet when she was at an Elizabeth Warren campaign event. “But I was just so inspired by her words,” said Brady, who often made rash decisions based on emotion. “I really felt like she could get rid of my debt and turn everything around for me.” Thus she made her last bad financial decision, which left her completely broke, by donating that dollar to Elizabeth Warren.

Brady is yet another victim of the great but not super-duper extra great economy and especially of her own decisions, picking up a ton of student debt in a major for which there aren’t any jobs. She has barely managed to subsist after college thanks to her low pay and also thanks to living in a place that is well out of her price range and constantly indulging in things like $30 avocado toast delivered through GrubHub because she “deserved it.” All of this has now culminated in her final dollar ending up in the failing presidential campaign of Elizabeth Warren to support Warren’s completely unworkable plans that would never pass Congress in the extremely unlikely event that Warren ever became president.

Warren seemed surprised by the dollar. “That’s all you have?” Warren said before snatching it. Brady then tried to hug Warren, but Warren’s handlers yelled, “No touching!”

“I really feel like things are going to turn around now,” said Brady after the event, though she then realized she had no way to get home. Eventually, she decided she could just put Uber on a credit card.

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4 Comments
MrLiberty
MrLiberty
February 13, 2020 12:58 pm

“Every election is a sort of advance auction sale of stolen goods.” – H. L. Mencken

Among the candidates, she is certainly planning on STEALING more than most to buy votes and pander. So one could understand the desire to see her win (and yes, I know the BEE is satire), especially among those who have nothing, do nothing, and think that everyone else is supposed to support that kind of lifestyle.

oldtimer505
oldtimer505
February 13, 2020 1:55 pm

She stood a better chance at winning the super ball lottery. Or living to the ripe old age of 200yrs old. Which ever came first.

KaD
KaD
February 13, 2020 7:40 pm

Newly-Elected Muslim Democrat State Lawmaker Gets Just 3 Months Jail For Stealing More Than $500K From Nonprofit Founded To Serve Mentally Ill And Poor

bob
bob
February 14, 2020 6:47 am

sociopaths and the people who love them.