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It is my sincere desire to provide readers of this site with the best unbiased information available, and a forum where it can be discussed openly, as our Founders intended. But it is not easy nor inexpensive to do so, especially when those who wish to prevent us from making the truth known, attack us without mercy on all fronts on a daily basis. So each time you visit the site, I would ask that you consider the value that you receive and have received from The Burning Platform and the community of which you are a vital part. I can't do it all alone, and I need your help and support to keep it alive. Please consider contributing an amount commensurate to the value that you receive from this site and community, or even by becoming a sustaining supporter through periodic contributions. [Burning Platform LLC - PO Box 1520 Kulpsville, PA 19443] or Paypal
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To donate via Stripe, click here.
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Use promo code ILMF2, and save up to 66% on all MyPillow purchases. (The Burning Platform benefits when you use this promo code.)
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Don’t think she had a chance of catching the wagon, and no way she fits down that hole. Just might have to wright that kid off
Yep, nobody really did like whinny Cindy Brady.
There’s another Cindy Brady?
Write – spelling police.
Try to find one or more humans that could balance well enough on that …
Goat yoga.
Fun gene.
Goats got it.
…..and Billy just stands there thinking….the kids these days.
Is that a pun?
Counting has stopped with Trump leading; let the cheating begin.
HUD project?
Nope: Chinese lockdown.
It’s the new way to keep those scary “unvaxed” safe, or some other gov bullshit
Short people are gonna have bad headaches.
I think the repairman watched too many Red Green episodes.
For that job, Red Green would have used the big dollar black duct tape.
100 MPH tape, black, one each.
But plug Pete keeping all the infrastructure up to code
Duct tape on a power pole? NO WAY!
Zip ties. Yeah, zip ties. The big ones.
Baling wire!
Would’ve been better if Fauci had been taped there before the collision.
Looks like something my 1st wife would do.
Congratulations, you are officially a “non-person.” Welcome to the new digital world. You said the wrong pronouns and now even the sink won’t recognize your existence. Oops…just realized it wasn’t an automatic faucet. But those automated ones often don’t work. Just wait until they are hooked to the “internet of things.”
I finally figured out my pronouns. Male/Man and I don’t work for the postal service.
After the Indians wiped out their main food source, the bison moose, only mass genocide by paleface settlers saved them from starvation. (That should earn me some thumbs down.)
good try Bob but we won’t fall for it………………….this time?
“Bison glasses idiot, that’s a Moose”
Thanks Captain Obvious. BTW I think of you often Bob.
Don’t stop Carol.
Bob secretly had a crush on you.
oh, now I understand. that’s why Bob always sings the old song: oh Carol, I am but a fool?
Feed it!
It’s a white fence that identifies as a brown fence to get in on the coming reparations.
Another lighter one trying to impersonate a darker one.
Gimps are welcome at our semi-accessible offices.
We try…not harder, but we do try.
Doing one as I type. GO TEAM!
Good luck! Last at bat I produced a grape!
I think I have a super bowel, what with my 200 decibel farts, but, for some reason, my wife disagrees.
If that is an indication of the contents of the cake?…I’ll pass.
Halftime is over and we are starting the turd quarter.
Joe Tadpole throws a no-hitter!
You sure his name isn’t “Newt?” Newt Hunter, Newt Kimball, Newt Randall?
Expensive playtime … at least by the looks of that magazine (.50 BMG?) …
Yep
I 9nce shot my brother in law’s .4570. He specifically told me NOT to lose the brass.
Brent won’t be cheating on Vicky anymore.
That was all for Barbie, she has yet to tag Brent who is now actively running nakid across the field.
I hope she gave him a 200 yard head start, to make it sporting.
Robby displays a little of the nerve that earned him his first wheelchair.
At least he’s wearing a helmet this time…
Why we eat them instead of worship them.
Damn you all, I just wanted to cool off and have a drink!
Wtf?
“The Ring” for nigs
You could almost see that horse chuckle …
I don’t give a shit about convention; that deserves a medal.
So what if the foundry burned down. I still say it was a good idea to put Fauci in there.
Now turn that into a firework and you’ll make millions.
Just when I thought I’d seen it all…
Crosby rules!
YourAvergeJoe was surprised after giving his wife the ultimatum–me or the cat. Now they’re never apart while YAJ sleeps in a back alley.
Poor Joe, he lives not to far from me, he can stay in one of the outbuildings if needed
Derp derp derp!
A better way to eat soft boiled eggs. Ingenious.
NO good way to eat soft boiled eggs.
Damn, that’s what I want! Always knew I would need a sword cane some day, but yeah f the outer cover
No one teases Ekaterina about her cane twice.
Tough neighbourhood?
Thawing out the Iditarod squad.
Kool cat.
Pissed of cat that knows what is going on. I feel him
Good advice to live by
Sounds like politician.
Is that Robert Da Zero?
my boss once made me apologize for my apology
I was forced to apologize by my boss and friend of 12 yrs, at that time, to a nigger for something I didn’t do. My apology was very similar to this and then I quit in front of the whole crew of cowards that would not defend me. I learned that day that money and morality didn’t walk the same path with my ex-friend.
What a motivational non sequitur.
Fighting for something and living for something are mutually exclusive.
I consider if I am near a fresh pair of underwear and weigh the odds of this one being liquid or gaseous.
Consider first if there’s a round in the chamber
With spring comes new life as flowering plants once again bring colour and joy. The birds and butterflies return. Baseball begins anew. And Suds shits his drawers.
Tha’s pretty phockin’ cold, you old hoser.
I greeted you a good mornin’ on this here thread,
right outta the gate,
and you mock me, for mistakenly thinking it was just flatulence?
Usually, I can still clutch my mud until I find a privvy. Yet still,
Sharts occasionally happen to most all of us. Fess up.
Must be the hops they use when brewing Molson or Labatt’s.
A curse be upon ye for such cruel mockery…
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the hairs of your nether-regions, o humorous one.
You’re gonna need an ocean,
of Calamine lotion.
Be scratching like a hound,
The minute you try to fool around.
Poison Iveee,
Poor Mrs..B.P.
Late at night while she’s sleepin’,
Ol Bobby comes a creepin’ a-round-round, round, round.
okay Mr. Happy, but the birds will crap on you and the honeybees will sting you. and don’t forget the mosquitoes and ticks?
Did you know that 99% of new fridges are taller than 67 inches? Neither did I till our fridge died and we learned that modern fridges are not only much shittier, they’re much bigger. So my choices are tearing out a cupboard or Samsung, which makes the least reliable appliances on the planet. And starving Africans think they have problems.
Had a Samsung French door. Piece of shit. Went back to Westinghouse side by side. Annoying, but better than the Korean crap.
Have an Amana we bought in 1984. Replaced a thermostat on ’99, still ticking every day.
Head to a West Va hills porch for all of your appliance needs. Fridge, washer, dryer all in working condition. May require some touch up paint.
Parents bought a new (turquoise) Frigidaire when we moved into a new house in 1963. It went to the grandparents in Oregon many years later. Was still running in 97 when the house was sold after grandma passed.
The old 1954 Hotpoint lasted over 50 years, the compressor finally failed, the motor still ran so a reed valve must have finally broken. Almost silent operation was a big plus, defrosting was done the old fashioned way though. Bring back R-12 and R-22 !!!
Hotpoint is not only good quality but at a good price. Had a washer & dryer that lasted for decades. Sold them at a garage sale, still working great, when the ex-wife bought new modern nice pieces of crap. I had to replace the tub bearing in the washer exactly 2 weeks after the 1 year warranty ran out. A month later had to replace the heating element in the dryer. I bet those Hotpoints are still going like a champ.
I kept the old fridge I got in college.
It doesn’t look so pretty, but it has the latch where you can still lock someone inside it until they suffocate.
And it keeps them cold until you figure out what to do with them.
Definitely makes it a keeper.
Fortunately, our current chimp is term limited out.
Bad news is that SheeJack has tossed her wig in the ring.
Say it ain’t so, Joe!
On the other hand, more humor material for FF. Houston’s goin’ down the shithole anyway…
Sheejack wears a wig? An acornhead I suppose.
does always look like the same worm head?
The Russians picked off the first 669 within 2 days, but number 670 will surely turn the tide!
Damn straight,cause 671 will be there to draw fire
go on the net and find the new picture of Puties latest recruits. all over 60y.o. and grisley!
Tuk-tuk technical?
It’s a frickin olive drab golf cart!
Ladies, I have a few dozens rolls of crap dap downstairs, and I’m willing to trade.
Don’t think id give up the donut
This must be the girl with the donuts.
Using a swing is suppose to be like riding a bike. You never forget.
Probably a shot reaction, perfectly normal, nothing to see here
Awww. A trio of chinklets!
Hello! Mr. Wonka? Yes, it is me, Kai Lee. I have, uh, “acquired” three more employees for your chocolate factory.
TWFYSU
After returning with just the jacket, Cheryl and Pat lost their babysitting gig.
That bitch is high strung.
Neighbor’s dog loves watching soccer.
Closing time at the beer tent of Oktoberfest?
Her name’s gotta be Gerta or Bertha, right, frau?
Wait.
I see blue and yellow on the tent ceiling.
Maybe there’s no more men around to drink in the beer tent in UKR.
That bad man Putin’ on the Blitz.
She’ll take you down to funkytown.
Slick, I love ingenuity making life easier.
All that was missing was the match.
Flames on the nigs would have been epic
FAFO. Petrol edition.
For the win.
$10 bucks and a few gallons of octane is a really cheap non registering defensive weapon.
The first 2 aholes got it hard in the face. That’s gonna sting.
Hopefully a sufficient distance far enough away for the fuel to atomize into the cabin air, one of the choir boys complains about what happened to them as being being unfairly victimizing and proceeds to ight up a joint.
And poof. Van-gone
Hot dogs for the pups tonight!
This robs the kid of their greatest joy in swinging: kicking Daddy in the butt.
Kicking in the nuts seems to be what they shoot for