WASHINGTON, D.C. — In the morning after a tragic cargo ship accident and bridge collapse in Baltimore, Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg called an emergency press conference to announce he is taking three more months of maternity leave.
“It has come to my attention that the twin babies I purchased at the baby store require more undivided attention,” said Buttigieg. “I will be taking some much-needed time off to care for my children, and that is in no way related to the tragic bridge collapse that apparently happened somewhere. Right now, I need to be a mother to my children. Please respect my family’s privacy during this time.”
Buttigieg then refused to take questions before jumping into a waiting helicopter and flying out of sight.
According to sources, Buttigieg still has 38 months of paid maternity leave available should he need it.
At publishing time, Buttigieg had issued an update, saying he would be extending his leave through the end of December.
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It’s so not funny what the former U.S.A. has become.
(The Bee uses the most magnificent sarcasm to pillory the putrid politicians that pretend to perform anything positive beyond pillaging posterity.)
I just figured it was true.
A reasonable assumption!
It will be.
Guaranteed.
The BEE is our Cassandra.
The Bee is just another establishment mouth piece Auntie, it is used to mock and demoralise you, constantly nudging the overton window to further extremes, while you just shake your head and laugh.
Still humor is needed, even the sarcasm kind.
I can no longer distinguish the BEE from reality.
Excellent alliteration, btw.
Give the guy a break.
Its hard work lactating man milk for his homo love child.
And pillow biting full time
So gross. Point taken though.
This twit is such a slut … I hope his husband doesn’t find out just who knocked him up this time …
That’s Mr. Booty Juice according to Owen Shroyer.
Born in 1956 , grew up in the 60’s / 70’s when the National Enquirer was at every grocery store checkout with amazing headlines like “ Bat Boy discovered “ or some other crazy thing. Now , in 2024 the daily headlines make Bat Boy seem like nothing , we have insane
people running the country ! Read Romans Ch. 1 and 2 Tim ch. 3 and see if it rings true !
Actually Bat Boy was in the NE’s sister pub, “The Weekly World News”, edited by Ed Anger.
You forgot the “The Baseball Player With Three Arms” marries the “Three Breasted Woman”.
I keep a couple old copies on the commmode tank for educational use.
Anybody want to dig up the newspaper clip from the past where a young Buttgag is implicated in the torture and killing of multiple dogs?
That kind of mind is who the manipulators recruit for a career in politics. He’s their boy.
Buttplug’s expression doesn’t seem to be as joyous as the one who is plugging his butt. Hmm.
He complains that anything over 4 inches hurts.
Don’t ask…you don’t want to know how he got pregnant…
He gives birth to buttnuggets.
they’re doing this to piss you off. and distract you. and it appears too be working
We have had one crisis after another in our transportation infrastructure and function. Does this ***hole do anything? Does he even show up for work? What exactly does he do for a living? Has he taken more maternity leave?
Neither he nor any of his buddies know what work is.
Could be good “friends” with Richard Grenell.
Word on da streets is triplets due JuLy 4th, one asian , the other two Siamese twins from Zimbabwe, all fluent in Spanish from their robot programmer