The GOP Is Changing, And That’s Good

Guest Post by Kurt Schlichter

Do you remember your stupid high school government teacher, that insipid left-leaning strange-o in the bad sport jacket who taught you that conservatives don’t want to change and liberals want change and blah blah blah? Good gosh, there’s nothing worse than the unionized hacks infesting our schools and filling empty skulls with nonsense. But enough about public education. The truth is that today’s conservatives do want change, and change is coming to our party. The new Republican Party is, as that desiccated old pervert masquerading as our president likes to say, not your father’s Republican Party. Thank goodness, because my father’s Republican Party was too often a bunch of sissy corporate lackeys who never met a war they didn’t want somebody else’s kids to fight.

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Clowns Debate Who Will Be Elected Next King Of The Clowns

Via The Babylon Bee

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WASHINGTON, D.C. — According to reports, a group of clowns has gathered at the Capitol Building to debate over who should be the next king over all the clowns.

“Ok guys, quit clowning around!” said Clown Dan Crenshaw as he attempted to calm down the other clowns. “It’s time to get down to clown business and figure out which clown should be Top Clown! Stop laughing guys, this is serious!”

Crenshaw then “honked” a giant red nose on his face and made a sad face.

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All This ‘True Conservative’ Talk About ‘Principles’ Is Just Another Lie

Guest Post by Kurt Schlichter

After two years of lectures about “principles” and “the Rule of law” by the establishment-loving hacks furious that normal Americans rejected them and elected Donald Trump, their performance last week demonstrated that their high-minded dedication to conservatism is all a fraud. It’s not about “principles” or “the Rule of Law.” It’s only about holding on to power – theirs.

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